One's Company
by Kelly376
Summary: Edward is a good looking guy. But it's difficult to get a date, because it means he has to open his mouth. He's accepted that he's a loser, but then he meets Bella... Rated M, primarily for language. Now with corresponding BPOV chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**Alright, guys! Here it is. Check it out, and I'll see you at the end.**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer is the genius. I just get to play with her characters.**

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I was going to be on the line by myself. Again.

Well, maybe not entirely by myself, but between needing to cut hours, and those convenient California labor laws, it made it pretty damn difficult to _not_ get a meal break violation unless you just sucked it up and allowed the only other person on the clock take their 30-minute break. Every once in a while I didn't mind, because I know that things happen, but this was getting ridiculous. Eric just had no sense of writing a schedule that actually worked with corporate demands _and_ that helped maintain everyone's sanity. _Prick_.

"Angela, it's fine, just take your break and don't worry about it. If the entire street decides they want coffee, I don't want you to come up here. Relax."

In any case, it's not as if I couldn't handle it. I had been at this location for 5 years now. I could handle almost anything.

There was probably a lull of five full seconds before the entire street _did_ decide they wanted coffee. And not just regular drip. Ohhhh, no. They all wanted lattes.

For a lesser man, it would have been chaos. For me, however, it was absolutely controlled. I infrequently addressed the line that I would be with them momentarily and apologized for any inconvenience, then continued to make small talk with the person I was simultaneously steaming milk for and ringing up at the register. This is where I shined. In all the time I'd been here, when the going got tough, I got going. The only kind of complaints I got were people leaving the line in a huff, but I didn't want to serve them anyway. Those people would have their undies in a bundle any which way you played it, but they would always come back to make your life hell another day. It didn't bother me. For the most part, when you know what you're doing, people see it, and understand. That's what I loved about customer service. I rarely had to reduce myself to satisfying a snobby customer because they threatened to report me or someone on my shift.

Finally, it died down and I served the last customer her quadruple-large 8-pump caramel latte (Ew.) and slid on to the floor against the cupboards. I pulled off my glasses to remove the beaded sweat from the bridge of my nose, and then replaced them.

About a minute passed before I saw the reflection from the door opening, and I popped up from behind the counter, ready for my next round of customers.

But it wasn't just any customer that I sent jumping 10 feet up into the air.

"Oh!" She said, her face immediately flushing and cupping her throat with her hand.

"I'm so sorry, Bella! I didn't mean to scare you. I guess we're just... popping up like daisies around here today." I used my favorite line to break the ice, and remind myself to remain calm. I ran my hand over my buzzed haircut. There was no reason to get worked up over just talking to her. I wasn't cocky, but my work was my domain. What I meant about being able to handle anything was pretty much true. This was the one place that I was almost entirely comfortable, because I knew my job so well, and could therefore be confident in my demeanor. My social skills, on the other hand, were another story, and I knew it all too well.

"It's alright, Edward, I think I've just got to come to terms with the fact that you're a morning person, and I'm... not."

"I really am sorry. Large Hazelnut Americano with half steamed milk, no foam?" I rattled off her drink that I had made so many times before.

"Mmmm... You're amazing." I tried _really_ hard to remember she was talking about my ability to memorize and make her drink perfectly, and not what I wanted it to mean. Which became more and more difficult each time she came in.

"Well, I do try." Thankful to have something to do and not be stuck trying to come up with something to say right away.

I moved over and started steaming the milk while I put her drink into the system, only charging her for the hazelnut flavoring and two shots of espresso. I wasted more milk than that in an hour just from replacing it so that it didn't burn.

"So... uhh... which class dragged you out of bed so early?"

As she began to explain that she actually really _did_ enjoy her Archaeology 350 class, just wished they offered it at midnight rather than nine in the morning, I watched her face. She was such a passionate person, and it really showed up when she discussed her major. By now I knew that she lived with her dad, Charlie, who was the Chief of Police, she was an Anthropology major with an emphasis in Archaeology and originally minored in Psychology, but then switched to Sociology, she vehemently chastised anyone who would dare make a racist joke in front of her, she was allergic to pet dander but always desperately wanted a Yorkshire Terrier, and she absolutely terrified me. Because I wanted her, like she wanted her Yorkie. But maybe that was a bad parallel. Yes. Definitely bad, but the sentiment is still there... just less... demeaning to Bella.

_Moving on, Idiot... _

"...and so then the _next_ slide he put up was of..." She continued to talk about her professor's last lecture about the new tomb they discovered in the Valley of the Kings.

She had come in all semester on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays between 7:15 and 7:40 in the morning and order the same drink, and was always animated whenever I'd ask her about a class that she was taking, unless it was something like math.

"Oh, damnit!" I ran over to the steamer and pulled the container away with a towel as the foam dripped all over the bar, the floor, and now my non-slip shoes that I had already needed to replace, because of the holes worn in the sides. _Warm, milky feet._ _Yummy_. Good thing I made a habit out of bringing an extra pair of socks to work.

"I'm sorry, Bella, I'm gonna have to start the milk over. I've burned it by now... which means I... dead espresso... Ugh. Wonderful."

"It's okay, I've got time. Don't even worry about it."

Bella always surprised me. Even the really nice customers I got would say something like, "Oh, I'll just take what you have there," in an effort to make my life easier. But I didn't _want_ to make my life easier, I wanted to make their coffee correctly, because I took pride in my work. It's what made my life livable, when I actually got something right. Somehow, right away, Bella understood that, and never questioned when I said I had to remake something.

"I wonder how I'm ever going to make proper coffee out on a dig. I wonder if they have mini power generators."

I laughed out loud at that, and it immediately lifted my mood. I don't think I had ever heard anyone make so many random comments as Bella over the entire time I had known them, and I had only known Bella for three months.

Three glorious months.

Three months knowing that I would never be able to do anything about the way I felt about her.

I finished her drink and set it in front of her.

"It's on me today." And gave her debit card back to her before she had a chance to argue, "It's the least I can do for wasting your time because of my inattentiveness."

"Aw, Edward, don't say that, I don't mind, really. But thank you, very much." She took a sip of her drink and her eyes brightened even more, then she closed them and took another sip. "Oh my gosh. Have I told you lately that you're amazing?"

Aaaaand there it was, again. This time, I couldn't stop myself from turning beet red. Right at that moment, Angela came back from her 30 minute break, and Alice walked in, ready to relieve me from my post.

"Um... you did, actually." I said, now witnessed by two other people I didn't really care to involve in our bubble. I ran my hand over my head again. It was a nervous habit I just couldn't break myself of.

"Well, it's as true now as it was then." She turned around and headed for the door. "Have a good day, Edward! Bye, Angela! Bye, Alice!"

"Bye, Bella! See you on Friday!" Angela and Alice both called back just as Bella walked out the door. I continued to stand there like a bright red goofball with milk on my feet, and I still hadn't cleaned the bar from my spill.

My two co-workers looked at me with raised eyebrows at my stance. Finally, I mumbled something about steamed milk that I didn't even understand myself, cleaned my area, and walked into the back room to clock out.

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**So let me know what you think! Questions? Concerns? Threats? Leave a comment! Woot! **

**Or… not-so-"woot" if you want to threaten me. **

**The next chapter should be up next week.  
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	2. Chapter 2

**Ren suggested that I rename this "Milky Feet". Well, I told her "Probably not, but I'll mention that in my next a/n."**

**I'm so glad you guys liked the first chapter! I got 4 reviews and several more followers and people who "favorited" this story within the first few hours of posting it. This is my first fic, so I was really surprised at how well it was received.**

**So I'm looking at my story traffic, and so far the countries represented are the US (61), the UK (11), Canada (6), Austraila (5), Germany (4), Poland (3), India (2), Romania (2), Belgium (1), Netherlands (1), Ireland (1), Israel (1), Spain (1), Finland (1). That's 100 of you, so thanks! Lots of you are solos out there, so give a shout out in the comments so we can say "hi!" **

**Today you're going to learn a little bit more about why Edward is the way he is, and it's not without cause. Okay, shhhhhh… (channeling Jana) …I'm reading.**

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I stood, leaning my forehead against my arm on the lockers, when Alice caught up with me.

"Morning, Edward?" I didn't know why her greeting sounded like a question.

I just let out a low grunt in response.

"Hey, are you okay? You seemed a little upset. It's really okay, we all burn milk and make a mess. Don't worry about it." I was actually beating myself up over the fact that I'm such a screw-up around girls, namely, Bella, but Alice addressed a point I hadn't even thought about until now.

"No, Alice, I don't. I _don't_ burn milk. I think I did that once when I first got here, and I never did it again. I don't know what's with me this morning." I pinched the bridge of my nose, pushing my glasses out of the way.

What was then meant to be a swift motion of yanking my change of clothes out of my locker and slamming it shut, ended up somehow with me pinching both my right pinky and left index finger, and it hurt like a mother. I can definitely say, though, it's nothing like smashing your middle finger under a huge box of milk jugs on the metro shelf in the walk-in refrigerator.

_Thank God you're off. You'd probably do that, today, too._

Alice just stood there looking at me with a mix of pity and confusion, not really knowing what else to say, so I decided to let her off the hook.

"I'm going to class. I'll see you tomorrow."

I felt bad for leaving, visibly upset and not filling her in on what was going on, but I knew this was something I'd have to deal with on my own, so I just got in my car and headed to school.

Despite what I told Alice, I knew why I was klutzy this morning, and it was because of Bella. She always clouded my mind, whether it was by her intoxicating strawberry shampoo, her soft hands when she would casually brush against mine while handing me her payment, her big, expressive brown eyes, or just _her_. More often than not, it was all of the above. And if something was missing, I'd wonder why I wasn't thinking about it, and successfully nip that in the bud, right there.

What I was going to do about the whole situation, though, I hadn't the foggiest idea. I couldn't talk to any of my friends. If there was any doubt about my dorkiness, there was definitely none about any of theirs. Don't get me wrong, my friends were awesome, but they all had the same problem I did, so it just became a huge whine-fest. And after experiencing a couple of those, I was sure my penis would fall off and reveal my girlie parts.

I couldn't talk to Alice about it. Even though we were pals, she had Jasper, she was happy, and she wasn't me. She couldn't possibly understand, even if I had hours to explain to her. Hell, I didn't even understand it very well. We also worked together, and that would be _highly_ embarrassing to cross that line. It would feel like high school all over again.

There were simply no other options, and that depressed me. Not a slit-your-wrists-depression, but enough to where I had the feeling I wouldn't have the ability to concentrate on anything, except me being a whiny bitch, all day.

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I was right. Halfway through my first class, and all I had done was write down the class number and the date on the top of my notebook paper. Maybe I had also drawn a perfect outline of Bella's profile… maybe.

_Maybe you should be writing "Edward Swan" on your paper, too. _

I glanced around the dark classroom, and then up at my professor. She was explaining the difference between eukaryotic and prokaryotic cells, with slides and a laser pen, aside from the obvious presence or lack of nucleus. I knew the difference. I hated having to take pointless junior high-level GE courses, and I had quite a few left because I avoided them like Ebola.

"Hey, can I borrow a pen? Mine ran out of ink." The girl whispered next to me. I gave her the one in my hand. It wasn't like I was using it, anyway. Except, of course, to act like a 15-year-old girl.

_Oh, and don't forget they're having a sale on tampons at the drug store._

"Thanks." She smiled lightly at me and then went back to her note-taking.

Girls in the beginning of any class would notice me. Not excessively, but I usually got to my classes early, chose a seat in the back, and would quickly be surrounded by the opposite sex. My downfall, however, would be when they would talk to me, and I had to respond. Each time, they would turn around to face the front of the room, and never address me without given cause, again. There were three trending scenarios, and I had mastered all of their variations.

_--Scene 1: _

_Girl: Hey, I'm [insert girl's name here]. And you are? (twists her hair around her finger)_

_Stupid Edward: Uh… I'm Edward. (stares at her twisting her hair)_

_Girl: What is it? (still trying to be flirtatious)_

_Stupid Edward: Well, you have very pretty blonde hair, but why do you dye the roots dark?_

This actually happened in high school. For the most part, after this little incident, I kept my mouth shut when it came to complimenting girls aside from "You look very nice," after maybe a prompt from her, or if it was the topic of conversation and I was somehow oddly involved.

_--Scene 2: _

_Girl: "Hey, there. This looks like it's going to be a pretty hard class. Do you want to trade numbers so we can study together?"_

_Stupid Edward: "Uh… do you ask all the guys in your classes that?"_

This was in my very first class, of my very first semester. I didn't _know_ it was a relatively normal thing to just randomly ask for people's numbers to study together! I could tell by the obvious way she looked at me that she found me somewhat attractive, and that's really all I could focus on, so the next thing that came out of my mouth had absolutely no filter at all. I recognized my mistake the second I said it, but it didn't matter, because I had completely insulted her. Maybe that meant that she really _didn't_ ask out of pure intentions, and she _was_ a complete slutbag, but that didn't make me any less of an ass for saying it.

_--Scene 3: _

_(Teacher explains guidelines of the class and goes over syllabus.)_

_Girl: "So this class seems like it's gonna be pretty brutal, huh?"_

_Stupid Edward: "Not really."_

The last scenario actually happened with the lovely girl who now has my pen. She didn't throw me death stares, or look at me like I was from Neptune, but she seemed to feel sorry for me. I guess they all finally figured that I wasn't a jerk, I was just completely, and utterly, inept at communicating. A few short necessary conversations later, and their suspicions were confirmed.

Intro to Biology was not a hard course. When I downloaded and skimmed the professor's syllabus from the Internet, I had the sudden urge to bang my head repeatedly against the wall for an undetermined length of time. In fact, if it had the ability to earn me an A, I would rather have done that instead of sitting through the entire semester in this room. The main problem was that I couldn't miss any classes. She made attendance part of her grade. She also graded our notes. She _graded our notes_. Not in-depth, but just made sure we had all of the key words on them and that it was more than a page long. I would not be getting credit for notes today, and I didn't care.

I spent the remainder of class staring at the profile of Bella I might have drawn on my paper. When everyone started gathering their things and the lights came back on, I quickly ripped it out of my notebook and threw the crumpled ball in the trash.

I had never been so messed up over a girl before. Of course, I knew this wasn't just any girl, but that was beside the point. What made this different was that I had never been so frustrated with _myself_.

By now, I had accepted my life. There were things I knew I was good at (e.g. work, video games and getting to class on time), and others I was not (e.g. talking to girls, ice skating and matching socks in the dark). Like I said, for the most part, this stopped bothering me a long time ago.

Well, it bothers me now.

And I still didn't know what I was going to do about it.

_Price check on pantyhose, aisle 9. Price check on pantyhose. Aisle 9._

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_**See? Up until college, he really **_**did**_** try to be outgoing, but it just came off as creepy and/or pathetic. So by now, he's given up. Well… up until now. Which is why there is a story for me to write about this incarnation of Edward and Bella. *grin***

**Okay, enough of me going on and on. Time for you to review! Yaaaay!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Well, you have all been amazing at spreading the word, apparently. I have WAY more hits than I ever expected with just the first two chapters guess what… there are only 8 comments. *sigh* This is your way of communicating with me, guys! How am I supposed to know if I'm a totally lame writer if you guys don't boost my ego with saying how awesome you think I am? Um… that was a rhetorical question, don't answer it.**

**Thank you so much to my betas, Sparks, Jana and Cora. Cora, your comments are never harsh. But at least now you said that you understand why I felt like I had to apologize all the time when I first started correcting Seeing Red for you. haha.**

**[Whispers: Shout out for Cora's fic Seeing Red. It's an alternate ending to New Moon, that totally kicks ass, and you should read it. Just follow www[.]fanfiction[.]net[/]~wolvesrmyhomeboys]**

**Ok, I'll bug you more down at the end. ;)

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I dropped my bag on the floor and fell face down on my couch. I completed all of my homework and half of the outline for my paper due next week during my four-hour break between classes. I didn't really mind. Work and school was all I had, my few friends were more into video games on their spare time anyway, and it gave me time to relax and complete what I needed to do and still have lunch. My tiredness was obviously not from physical strain.

I chose to do what I always did when I was down on myself, and that was flip on my Xbox 360 and play Halo 3 until I just couldn't focus my eyes anymore, or I felt hungry enough to eat an entire cow. It had been my habit for the last couple years now (playing until I had to fill my basic needs, not eating large quantities of beef). I knew every level of the game inside and out, and I pretty much stuck to being the Arbiter for ninety-nine percent of my plays.

From about the time I was 7, I would play a game until I got sick of it. When the Internet exploded, I added playing multiplayer online until I got sick of that. I'd sell it, and buy another one. I rarely had more than one game at a time, because I liked learning a game so well that I could pretty much guarantee success, with very few interruptions. When Halo 3 came out, there was enough variation and modifications from the last two versions that I just hadn't grown tired of it yet. I usually enjoyed just choosing a playlist and letting the "matchmaking" system line me up with random people who fell close to my rank. I had made quite a few friends over the last couple years, and we would discuss strategy and the fact that we could spot n00bs using their big brother or sister's account. It wasn't a problem, we would just annihilate them, and continue on our way. Most everyone had respect for n00bs—we remembered what it was like to suck in the beginning—but not when they tried to take respect they hadn't earned yet.

Once it was fully loaded and I had chosen all my new preferences, I had a weird feeling, but tried to ignore it. I began a round with a new group of people, but I just couldn't concentrate on what I had to do next. I hit the controller to whip around to see what was behind me, but then the screen zoomed out and showed my killer leaping victoriously at my demise.

_What the hell have you done?_

Apparently I was still in a funk, because I had died within 2 minutes of beginning the round. I threw my controller against the wall, successfully breaking it, and snapped off the console without properly shutting it down. I'd worry about buying another controller later. Right now, I was hungry, tired, and I still had laundry to do.

vvv

I ate my piece of mushroom pizza in silence and looked out the window of the parlor while taking a swig of my Sprite. I was very grateful that both the Laundromat and pizza were available directly across the street from my apartment building, and right next door to each other.

Randomly, I saw Bella walking down the sidewalk, arm-in-arm and laughing with a big, dark curly-haired giant with dimples. She noticed me sitting inside, but obviously not my deer-caught-in-headlights look. She smiled, waved, and continued down the street.

Bella had never mentioned dating anyone, but it's not like we were best buddies, and it just never came up. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how completely impossible it would be for someone like Bella to not be dating someone. If she wasn't, I was sure she had boatloads of guys coming up to her left and right.

If I had thought it was impossible for me to be any lower than I already was, I was incredibly mistaken. Because the hole that was already in my abdomen threatened to consume my stomach all together, and I was no longer hungry.

_I've run out of girlie metaphors for you. You're just pathetic._

And I was so aware of it.

I waited until Bella was out of sight, went next door to take out my almost-dry clothes, stuffed them in my hamper, and made my way back to my apartment.

Not wanting to wake up to the funk of mildew, I dumped my clothes out on to the floor in front of my television, and stalked off to my room like a 5-year-old with a temper tantrum. I had put myself through so much today, unnecessarily, and it only took a couple minutes to drift off.

vvv

My brain was apparently more tired than my body was, and then I think halfway through the night it flip-flopped, because I basically spent an entire eight hours telling myself that I needed to go back to sleep. From the times I recall, I woke up at 10:10 p.m., 10:48 p.m., 11:53 p.m., 12:05 a.m., 1:45 a.m., 3:57 a.m., 4:31 a.m., 5:05 a.m., 5:35 a.m., and then a final time at 5:49 a.m.. The last one frustrated me a bit, because by then I had (sort of) slept the whole night, and I never actually slept after that, I just kept my eyes closed for eleven minutes.

Now, I'm a college student. I'm used to getting not-so-perfect sleep. But when I actually have the time for it and I just can't, it'll put me in a slightly bad mood. Please note the sarcasm.

I normally didn't have work on Thursdays, but I was picking up the rest of Eric's shift so that he could go to his sister's boyfriend's grandmother's birthday or something. Which is a brunch.

_Convenient._

I had a few hours to be at work, so I decided to put my uniform in my car and go for a jog. I had been left with only my thoughts for way too long, so I made sure to bring my mp3 player to keep me distracted.

My normal jog didn't normally wind me—it was just a way to boost my heart rate a little—but by the time I got back to my apartment, I was pooped. I might have overdone it a bit with the pent-up anxiety.

I still had a while, so I took a long, hot shower, futilely trying to scrub off the coffee that was now permanently embedded in my pores. I eventually gave up. The coffee smell was so strong, I even had to change the shampoo that I used originally, to something that wouldn't combat with it. It was my mom's idea, but I must say that I had less headaches after I did. Who knew?

I was totally useless just sitting in my house trying to kill time. But I also didn't want to sort through and fold all of my clothes that were still lying out on the living room floor, so I decided I'd just head to work early. Eric would be so pleased. _Prick_.

I already had my clothes in my car, and I brought a book to kill some time. It was one I was reading early for the Intro to Sociology that I was going to take the next semester.

vvv

"Oh my gosh."

I looked up, startled, to see Bella sitting across from me, at my table.

"You're taking Engel for Intro, aren't you?" Her eyes flashed between me and the book I was reading.

"Uh… no… but I am next semester. W-why?" I was just responding to a question, couldn't I get it out without sounding like a bumbling fool?

"Well, the book you're reading is great, but the class is brutal. Let me know if you need help with it. I'll definitely be able to give you a few pointers on how to get through it. Even Mrs. Ramirez, the prof I'm T.A.-ing for now, agrees that his classes are unnecessarily difficult. Especially for an introductory class, which will totally turn off anyone to Sociology, if they have only a moderate interest in the subject."

I stared blankly at her for a few moments and then finally mumbled, "Yeah… the… book is really good so far." I just _couldn't_ get anything else to come out.

Bella giggled and kept talking. "Sorry, I guess I'm a little more talkative when I've had more sleep." Then she looked around when she heard her drink being called.

"Large hazelnut… half… steamed milk, half water with two shots of espresso?" Jessica called out at the bar in her high-pitched "projecting" voice. Bella got up out of the chair to go get her coffee, and promptly took off the lid… something that I had never, ever seen her do. She looked down in her cup, rolled her eyes, took a deep breath, and walked to the condiments table.

I watched her, and I was very confused as to what she was doing, until I saw her grab two wooden stirrers and started to spoon-out the foam that Jessica had put on the top of her drink. But Jessica was good at her job, and Bella came in all the time, so I didn't understand why she would have messed it up.

I went over to Bella, now in work-mode, and asked her what the problem was. She had successfully removed almost all of the foam, but now her cup was about a fifth short.

"Bella, let me remake that for you." I tried to take the cup, but she replaced the lid.

"No… thank you, but it's fine. She made it right, I just really, really hate foam. It's my own thing, don't worry about it."

As she finished her sentence, she put her hand on my forearm. A spark of electricity passed through us, Bella jumped, squeezed the cup that was in her left hand, and it exploded all over her, me and the table.

She closed her eyes, took another deep breath through her nose. She raised her chin, looked at me with a fake grin on her face, and then handed me the cup.

"I'm sorry. Thank you." She said mechanically.

I, on the other hand, gave her a very genuine smile and walked briskly around the counter and tossed the cup into the trash. I put on an apron, and started to steam the milk and brew the espresso. Jessica had the strangest look on her face, like she had smelled something horrible, and then walked into the back room.

I glanced over at Bella, and realized she was covered with coffee.

_Wet Bella._

_This cannot be happening._

_Don't burn the milk again, Dipwad._

Again, thank God for the job I had to focus on.

"Ugh. This day CANNOT get any worse." She said fairly harshly, trying to blot the moisture off with a couple zillion napkins. Then she looked up at me with an apologetic smile. "Sorry, I guess I'm just in a bad mood today."

That caught me off guard. "You seemed to be in a pretty good mood about 5 minutes ago."

I realized how presumptuous that came off _after_ I had said it, but I was truly confused. She had been chatty and chipper when she was talking to me about my class.

"Well… I guess the anticipation of coffee and the discussion about an awesome subject is the formula to make me forget the crappy morning I had."

"I'm sorry, do you want to talk about it?" I said, as I handed the replacement drink to her. I couldn't imagine what might have happened that would put her in such a state. I don't think I'd ever seen her in a poor mood. I may not be able to speak two coherent sentences together, but I could at least listen. In fact, I would listen to her talk all day, if it wasn't so stalkerish.

"Well—" She glanced at her phone, and her eyes almost bugged out of her head. "Oh, shoot! I was wrong. This day can ABSOLUTELY get worse! I'm going to be late for class. I'm so sorry! I'll see you tomorrow, Edward!"

Well, she didn't say I was awesome, but the thought of seeing her the next day did the same flip-floppy thing in my stomach.

_Remember Dimple-Faced Sasquatch, Genius?_

_Flip-floppy feeling's gone. Replaced by gaping hole.

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**So… Thoughts? Concerns? Threats? I like all of them in comment form, even the threats. 'Cause then I can e-mail you back and tell you to shove it up your ass. LOL. Not really, I wouldn't do that. (Shut up, Jana.)**

**OH! I also just remembered. If you haven't seen my profile, it does mention that I'm a grammar freak. I usually go over these so many times that I catch everything, but if I am missing something that's so obvious it's silly, please let me know. Woot! *puts up the "rock on" symbol and headbangs***


	4. Chapter 4

**This chapter is in memory of Edward, the Spider. He was just chillin' on my wall, and freaked me out a bit, so I killed it with my shoe. Jana informed me that he was probably the Edward of spiders, and that there are hundreds of girlie spider cries going out. She also says they've probably raised a flag in his honor. I told her that, despite his well-built frame, I don't invite spiders to tea like she does. If they're in my room, they die.**

******If there are any doubts about anything that you read in my chapters, please read the a/n at the beginning and end. I know I'm kinda long-winded… but I try to keep it entertaining… so… sorry? :-P**

**The interaction between Alice and Edward in this chapter is actually what inspired this story, so I'll be interested to hear your thoughts about it.**

**Just so you know, Edward will be in and out of "funky town" for a while. I just don't want you to be expecting a sudden recovery from years and years of self-deprecation. He's got issues like everybody, and they can't be fixed overnight. This fic is a little more realistic than most, I'd like to think. I love fantasy as much as the next girl (we read Twilight—come on), but there's a time and a place for realism, along with a bit of hilarity added to it. I mean, who doesn't enjoy Edward talking about his man-bits? Maybe Cora, but in this situation, it doesn't count. So hah.**

"**Shut up, Kelly."**

**Shutting.

* * *

**

Eric handed me a clipboard with three sheets of paper, completely full with two columns of checkboxes.

"Edward, I need you to finish this by the end of your shift."

"What is it?" It _looked_ like our semi-annual store maintenance checklist.

"It's the semi-annual store maintenance checklist, and it was supposed to be done yesterday."

_Right._

"Then why am I only hearing about it now? Eric, I don't have access to this information, and you know that it changes every year. You need to assign someone to do it." I was getting more and more upset that this guy had ever successfully interviewed for a management position.

"That's why I'm _assigning_ you. I'm outtie!" My mouth fell open as I watched him prance out of the back door.

So I now had 5 hours to complete something that should be done over the course of a week.

Okay. It was nine. I had Jessica on with me right now, and she could handle the line by herself unless it got really bad. Then Alice was on for the mid shift at ten. Jessica got off at eleven. That would give me a whole hour where I could have one of them switch off between helping me and going out on the line, and I could just focus. I had until two. Technically I could stay longer and I'd be able to finish this at a more leisurely pace—even though there'd be nothing leisurely about it—but I already didn't want to be here today, especially covering for Eric. Along with doing something that he should have given me two weeks ago so I could actually complete it, and still do my job.

_You could do it. Just get a pair of latex gloves, and you can stick him in the dumpster out back. No one would ever know._

No matter how much I loved entertaining the idea of homicide, it didn't take away from the fact that I had a job to do now. So I just started doing it.

vvv

Everything was going pretty smoothly, and I was actually getting through the list fairly quickly. It all came back to me, once I got started and I had something coherent to work with.

_And someone to daydream about…_

Alice arrived, Jessica offered to help me a bit, and at eleven I sent Jessica home. For the next few hours I just kept going, and then suddenly realized I had taken no breaks. Once I recognized it, my legs suddenly felt like Jell-O, and I had to take a ten that ended far too quickly.

_Okay… next on the list is…_

Table legs. _What?_ I didn't remember that one. The description next to it was, "Ensure that legs for all tables, countertops, etc., are sturdy and overall presentable." Well, okay then.

I started with the back room, and ran my hand lightly up and down each one and made sure they were sturdy, although I felt pretty silly.

_You'd notice if table legs were breaking off. This is dumb. Go to the next item._

But I was nothing, if not thorough, with everything in my life. This was not going to be an exception.

It was relatively monotonous, and my mind automatically started to drift to Bella… again. I wondered what it would be like to hold her. When she had touched my arm earlier, I didn't know where that jolt of electricity came from, but it wasn't exactly dry weather, and we never kept the heater on because of all the machinery. It was also much more pleasant than a static electric shock, which—shockingly (pun, very much intended)—confused me further. Rather than dwelling on the fact that I apparently knew nothing about anything, I walked out on to the front line and did the same thing with the stainless steel countertops.

I heard a quiet gasp behind me, coming from the lobby, and I turned around to see Alice gaping at me, holding the broom mid-sweep.

"What?" She continued to look at me like I had just sprouted a third eye on my face, but didn't respond. "Alice, please. I have work to do. If you're not going to talk to me…"

I stopped, because she looked like she had decided to say something. I felt my forehead, just making sure there was nothing there. She opened and closed her mouth a couple times. I had never seen her speechless before, so it made me maddeningly curious. Finally, she spoke.

"I want to help you."

_Well, that wasn't at all cryptic._

"You want to help me… with… what exactly?" Maybe she understood that if I didn't complete this checklist by the end of my shift, then Eric would write me up again. Prick. However, it didn't seem like it. I was a social outcast, not stupid.

Then she blurted it out all at once.

"_Edward-I-want-to-take-you-out-and-completely-replace-your-wardrobe-and-glasses-and-teach-you-how-to-act-around-girls._"

I blinked at her. "Come again?"

She took a breath to regain her composure. "Edward, I want to tell you right now: You are no where close to my type, and I don't want you to think I'm coming on to you, because, believe me, I'm very happy with Jasper… but do you know how sexy it was when you handled the legs of that table? It looked like you were feeling up a woman." I blinked again. That actually made sense, because I was thinking about Bella. "And now that I think about it, there are a lot of things you do, naturally, that would be a real turn-on for a good number of girls."

Now it was my turn to gape like an idiot. I wanted to say something—anything—but it just came out as a very unmanly squeak. She started again.

"Why do you think so many flirt with you at the register? I've even seen a couple give you their numbers. It's not that you don't have it in you, it's that you think about it too much. Now I can see that if I help you around that hurdle—to see that all you need to do is be comfortable with yourself—there is no reason that you couldn't get any girl you wanted."

My mind went straight to Bella. _Right. Like it hasn't been there all day._ But then my realistic side told me that there was no way that was ever going to happen, and I should just get back to work. I now only had 15 minutes to get through 30 items.

Alice saw me looking at the checklist. I still hadn't responded to her rambling, but she could see my indecision.

"Look… I'll help you get through this list if you let me come over today after we turn over the daypart to Lauren and Mike."

I snorted. Being a shift lead, I should probably have called-off Lauren (she would be more than happy about that) and finished her shift myself. Why Eric ever thought scheduling them together would be a good idea, I'll never know. All they did was flirt, and nothing was going to get done. But the curious—I should really say "stupid"—side of me wanted to see if this idea of Alice's would actually work.

"A-alright. I'll leave the clipboard right here, we'll just go down the list and check off each thing as we complete it."

"Excellent." She stated, as she came over and began with the next item on the sheet.

She looked very pleased with herself.

And I was starting to get nervous.

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**One thing I am not doing in this fic is being sneaky. There is no hidden agenda. Edward doesn't see everything, so, obviously, he wouldn't have a clue what was going on. This is also what's causing him to take so long to grow a pair and just man-up to Bella. There are too many "ifs" and he's gone too long with not trusting himself with anything.**

**To put your mind at ease, this is not a makeover story. Remember, in real life, not everyone knows everything. That leads to a bit of suspense for the character, too, not just the reader, but in real life, lots of suspense comes to naught. So keeping with the "realistic" side of it, I'll also try to put those questions at ease as soon as possible.**

**If you have any concerns at all, I will definitely answer questions that I don't think will give anything away, either way, but I don't have a problem saying that I'm a HEA girl, and I always will be. I don't think I could put myself through so much angst and not have him get the girl in the end. 'Cause those stories bug me. No offense to those people who write them...**

**...Shutting.**

**So… reviews are like crack, and I respond to all of them. Ready to feed my addiction? Yessssssssss…**


	5. Chapter 5

**So two people have asked me if Edward is going to date anyone else. The answer is "no." Some of you may be saying "Noooo, don't give anything away!" Others of you would tell those people "Shut up, she's telling us secret information! Aaaah!"**

**But if you haven't noticed by now, Edward is completely sprung on Bella. With the kind of guy Edward is, he wouldn't want to date anyone else, because he knows it wouldn't go anywhere, and he would feel super horrible about wasting a girl's time like that. And no, Alice is not going to try to set him up with anyone. She doesn't know him well enough to be comfortable doing that, but she does know him well enough to know that he _definitely_ wouldn't appreciate being put in a situation like that.**

**Side note: Vic Reeves is a British comedian. I've seen a couple of his sketches, but the main reason I mention him is specifically because his horn-rimmed glasses are absolutely hideous, and I couldn't imagine looking good on anyone. Cora was like, "Who in the world is Vic Reeves?" So I figured I had to mention it. Look him up!**

**Thanks betas (Sparks, Jana and Cora)… I need all three of you so that my chapters aren't totally demented. Whenever I consider things that I change due to a beta edit, it reminds me of the line in The Goblet of Fire where Harry says, "How could anyone possibly figure that out? It's completely mental." That line cracks me up, every… single… time.**

**Don't ask. I'm lame. Just read. *shakes head*

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**

I drove Alice over to my apartment after Lauren and Mike clocked in. I tried to ignore the responsibility I still felt for Eric's stupid mistake of scheduling them together. Alice turned on the radio and sang along with every song, the entire ten-minute drive. It would have been entertaining if my nerves weren't already shot from the day.

I stuck the key in the lock and opened the door, letting Alice go in ahead of me, and closed it behind me.

"Okay, yeah, this is nothing like how I pictured your apartment… Except, maybe, those." She pointed, amused at the pile of wrinkled clothes that I refused to fold that morning. "Otherwise, everything seems pretty clean. I guess that makes sense. My room was total disaster area when I lived at home, but now that I'm moved out, I'm as neat as a pin." She added, nonchalantly.

I nodded, but just leaned up against the frame of the front door. This was her show, I realized, and I really didn't know what she wanted me to do. Not that I would necessarily do it. Part of my qualms with changing my actions was that I really didn't want to become a lemming. I wanted people to appreciate me for who I was. But I guess I didn't know who that was, which meant I just remained stagnant, and weird.

_Why didn't you think about all this _before_?_

"Well, are you going to give me the grand tour?" Alice tore me from my self-deprecation, and started bouncing on the balls of her feet. It actually frightened me. She worked at a coffee shop, she never drank coffee, yet she still had all of this energy.

"Uh, sure. Well, this is the living room, obviously." I pointed to the pile of clothes on my right. I motioned to the kitchen on the left, then through the doors and into the hallway, I showed her the bathroom on the right, and my room straight ahead.

"Oooh… the Man Cave… can I go in? You don't mind, do you?" She seemed genuinely intrigued as to how my "Man Cave" would look.

"Go ahead." I sighed deeply, still having no idea what the heck she had planned.

Looking around at my bare walls, basic flannel comforter on my bed and my desk light, there wasn't much else to see except the pictures that I had on top of my chest-of-drawers. It was funny to see her have to reach up to the top, where I towered.

"Take off your glasses." I was slightly stunned at her command, but obeyed. Holding a picture, she walked up to me, took my glasses in her hand, and looked me up and down. "You are _really _attractive Edward. But these glasses?" She wrinkled her nose. "No. They _don't_ look good on Vic Reeves, and they _don't_ look good on you. Do you have contacts?"

"Well, I do have one pair, but they irritate my eyes too much." I answered honestly.

"Keep these for emergencies until we can get you a new pair," she handed back my glasses, "but try to get used to contacts. They don't distract from your features, and I've seen it happen too many times where your glasses fog-up at work. It's a hassle that you can definitely forgo."

I just nodded. It wasn't too bad so far, but I was still waiting for her to say that I needed a new wardrobe, and lightly calculated how much money I had put away for emergencies.

_This is demeaning, and silly._

_But if it helps you get a shot with Bella…_

_Is she worth it, if you have to change yourself?_

I would see how it went. Everyone had their breaking point. I knew I'd probably be able to recognize that.

She walked back over to my pictures, and gave a little gasp. The second one today. She whipped around to look at me, and then looked back at the photo she had in her hand. I recognized the frame. It was the one of me and my parents two years prior when we went backpacking. Never wanted to try that again. My mom overloaded us with so much junk, we could barely make it back up the ravine. And she was a trooper, but she insisted that we bring a gallon each of filtered water for the twenty-minute hike—that turned into a two-hour hike because of all the stops we had to make for when one of us would get winded—both ways. Just in case.

"Why in the HELL did you chop all of your hair off?" She demanded. I laughed nervously as I realized I had started to run my hand over my head, and stopped.

"Well, as you can see, I have this nervous habit of running my hand through my hair. Or… _over_ my hair, now. It was just becoming a pain. It would get dirty really fast, and I could never tame it. It just went every which way, so I decided to solve both problems and buzz it."

"Well, don't. Edward, you have sex hair. Do you understand how many men would give their left testicle for a head of hair that you have naturally?" She didn't wait for me to answer. "Tell you what… let it start growing out, and if it becomes a problem and you don't like it, then I can recommend some product you can put in it." I groaned. "Well, I'm hungry, and you have a pizzeria across the street. Let's go!"

vvv

I ordered a large Hawaiian pizza for the both of us. While we were waiting, I told Alice about my experiences with communicating with people—girls, in particular—and she just sat there and listened intently. She was working on the last of her half when she spoke (Girl can put food away, that's for sure).

"I wanted to apologize." Alice said after she swallowed a bite of her pizza.

"For what?" I automatically responded with a full mouth.

"For assuming that you had bad clothes and implying that you're a loser." She winced at the memory, and I could tell she was really bothered by it.

I waited to clear my mouth before I answered, this time.

"Alice, don't even worry about it. I'm fully aware that I completely fail at a lot of things. I guess I just don't know what to do to change that. I think I just gave up around my first semester of college so I wouldn't embarrass myself anymore." I don't think I had ever been so candid with someone before, and it was scary as hell, but refreshing at the same time.

"No, that's not it." She looked at me pensively.

"Are you saying that I'm lying to you?" I was slightly offended. Okay, I was a _lot_ offended.

"No! I'm sorry, I didn't mean that the way it came out. All I meant was that, from what you've told me, it just seems like you assume that people expect you to _get it_ the first time. What you need to realize is that no one _gets it_ the first time. Sure, some people come off like they know what they're doing, but mainly it's just because they don't let what other people say determine how they're going to act. I wouldn't take that to the extreme and not consider your audience, but you just need to stop caring if you're going to look like an idiot, and laugh at yourself. How do you think any of us get through life?"

I listened to her, like she listened to me. And I heard her, but I knew all of this.

"Look… I know you're trying to help, but I already understand the concept. I just can't say anything that sounds remotely sane when I'm under pressure. I—" But she interrupted me.

"No, Edward, it's exactly that. The last thing I want is you thinking that I'm trying to belittle you, but all you really need is practice. Be around normal people. And people who _don't_ intimidate you." I snorted at that. "You think I'm kidding, but I'm not. Listen… come out with us tomorrow night. Angela, Ben, Jasper and I go to this cute little jazz bar about 20 minutes away from the store, and we'd love for you to come with us."

"Are… you sure they won't mind?" I was a little worried about being the odd man out.

But she looked at me with such anticipation, I didn't want to turn her down.

"Absolutely not. I actually mentioned that I was planning on inviting you last week." There was hesitation in her voice, "…And you can bring someone along if you'd like." She tacked-on at the end, even though she knew it was completely unnecessary.

I just smirked at her, and she laughed at me.

Well, at the very least I had made a closer friend out of all this madness. We were a strange pair, but we got along surprisingly well. It made me feel quite a bit better, knowing that I had someone to tell things to, who actually tried to understand.

vvv

The next morning, I watched as Angela took Bella's order at the register. Then, while waiting for her coffee, she came and stood in front of the bar, grinning.

"I'm moving out!" She exclaimed, and I grinned right back at her. I couldn't help it. Bella's enthusiasm was intoxicating, just like the rest of her. "The only problem is that it's in the opposite direction of school, which means that I won't be able to come in as often as I'd like… Which means I'll be caffeine deprived, which means that I'll fail all of my classes, which means I'll end up moving back with my dad and being a bum for the rest of my life." She took a deep breath and continued. "Wow, this moving out thing might not be such a great idea." She said with a look of mock irritation on her face.

"I'm sure you won't fail all your classes, Bella." I replied, quietly. I was still reeling from the fact that I wouldn't be able to see her as often as I was used to. It just made me… really sad.

_Pansy._

_Shut up._

"No? Just some of them?" She looked at me expectantly, but couldn't hide the smirk on her face.

"Hello, Bella!" Alice skipped in and gave both of us a glowing smile. "Edward, you can peace-out early if you want! I've got this!"

I almost told her that it was fine, that she should just go in the back and relax until I was off. But then my brain actually started functioning.

_You and Bella are leaving at the same time. You are about to turn down an opportunity to walk her out to her car... Finish her drink and hurry the hell up!_

Bella raised her brow at my hesitation. I desperately wanted to ask her to wait for me, but I was actually just counting on the fact that I didn't have anything to grab, and hopefully catch her out the door.

"Thanks, Alice!"

I quickly handed Bella her drink, and ran in the back room. I threw my apron on the hook, and tried to catch Bella before she left.

My heart sank. There was no sign of her in the lobby, or walking outside. But I heard Angela speak, and then the musical laugh that followed, and saw she had waited for me.

She waited for me.

_Yes. And you're standing here like a statue because…_

At that point, she saw me. "Ready to go?"

I think my heart stopped.

I almost ran to her side as she started walking toward the door. When we reached it, I opened it for her and she passed so close to me, all I could think about was the scent of her strawberry shampoo, and almost forgot to keep following her.

_Think of something to say. Hurry. Don't say anything stupid. Stop THINKING about what you can say, and just say SOMETHING!_

"Uh… wha…"_ WITHOUT stuttering. Or hyperventilating. You need breath to speak, as well as brain function._

"Did you say something?"

"W-when does your class start?" _Brilliant. Now you're going to come off like a stalker. Someone who wants to know when they'll start looking for a body._

"Oh, my Sociology 115 class starts at ten today. It's an entire three hours, though, so I try to get there early so I can mentally prepare myself. Rushing to class is never a good idea for me. One time I had to go stand outside because I sprinted to class and was completely out of breath for a full 5 minutes. It was really embarrassing. Including the holes in my jeans from falling. _That_ was a fun day." She rolled her eyes at the memory.

_Wow. She responded and _didn't_ think you were weird._

It took me a second to realize we had stopped in front of her truck. Which also made me realize I was staring. Again. Would I ever be able to just _be_ around Bella, without having to completely berate myself for my actions?

_Probably not. If she doesn't say something—_

"Thank you for walking me to my car, Edward. I hope you have a good day at school!" She said as she was climbing into the cab.

"Oh, I'm not going to school today." I blurted out.

_Yeah. Let her know you sprinted out here just to walk her to her car, why don't you?_

"Oh…"

_Yeah. So much for not screwing things up. Captain Awkward strikes again! *Doot-do-do-doooo!*_

"Well, I'll see you later, then, Bella. I hope you like your new place." I quickly ended our conversation to stop myself from saying anything else incriminating.

"Thanks. I'll see you later!"

She closed the door, turned on the engine, and began to back out of her parking spot. I could hear the faint sounds of the radio, but couldn't distinguish what it was.

_Note to self: search for Bella on any networking site she has registered with, and find out what music she likes._

_Because asking her yourself would be completely out of the question, and much less creepy. Creeper._

I went to my car, but then noticed I left my phone in my locker.

Walking back in, I saw Alice flitting around the bar, keeping up with each drink as it was being ordered. I was good, but Alice made it look easy. I also saw Angela, still at the register, and she kept eyeing me as I walked toward the back room.

"I left my phone." I said, suddenly feeling the need to defend myself.

"Uh huh." She winked at me, then raised her eyebrow in a knowing look, her mouth partly open, and trying to hold back a smile.

I winked back, sarcastically, and narrowed my eyes at her. She wouldn't win this round of I-know-something-and-I'm-not-going-to-let-you-defend-yourself. She went back to helping the next customer, so I just rolled my eyes and went to grab my phone.

When I was almost out the door when they both yelled, "See you tonight, Edward!"

I remembered that I had promised Alice I'd go out with the four of them to the jazz club tonight.

_So it's going to be Alice, and Angela, and their boyfriends. Aaaaand… you. Yeah. Have fun with that.

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_

**I hope this isn't too much of a cliffie for you guys. Not that it would matter much, since I just might have to post chapter 6 later today. You're all so spoiled… *sigh* Tonight both Cora and I have insomnia, and I woke up to quite a few edited chapters in my Inbox! Woohoo! Oh, and you can also thank her for the extra long chapter. This is almost a full 6 pages, and I usually only give you 3. Looks like the next one is gonna be like that, too. And she looks at reviews, too, so you can address her in the comments and give her your eternal gratitude.**

**Just remember that it's getting to a point to be really difficult to write, so enjoy it while it lasts, but PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don't cut out on me! You've all been so wonderful at reviewing and keeping up on the chapters, just please trust me that this does actually take up a majority of my thoughts during the day, and I will never abandon you.**

**Also, fair warning, Edward has a lot of growing up to do. It's going to be a few chapters before he and Bella are actually able to spend more than 5 minutes together, but pleeeease just trust me and wait for it. Thanks!**

**So… any speculations? Don't worry, if you've commented, you know that I'll tell you if you're completely off. Just let me know if you want to keep speculating and not correct you. Hahahaha.**

**Reviews? Yesssssss……**


	6. Chapter 6

**Cora and Jana, from the very beginning, always said that Edward was never as socially inept as I wanted to portray. When in reality, he's just so good at his job, it doesn't come out there so much when he's working. I am SOOOO glad that I've apparently succeeded in proving that he really does just over-think everything, and says it all the wrong way. Hahahaha.**

**It occurred to me that the other employees at this coffee shop are not getting very much face-time. Well, Edward, Alice and Angela are the main morning crew. Jessica works mornings with Alice and Eric, but not Edward, and even when she does have to open, it's only a few hours. Basically, the three of them are the reliable ones, and Eric doesn't want to get up early more than he has to, so he tries to keep them happy. He's a prick, not dense. Hahaha.

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My phone rang when Alice called me at 8 p.m., asking me if I was ready to go.

"_We have a standing reservation at 9:00, Edward. I'm going to pick you up, so you need to be ready by 8:30."_

"I am ready—" I was cut off by a knock at my door. "Hold on a minute, Alice, there's someone here."

I opened the door to see Alice standing there, closing her phone and looking me up and down.

"Yeah… _no_. You are not going out like that."

"Alice, if you were going to come over here, why did you call?"

"Don't ask questions. Come with me."

She took my hand and dragged me back to my room, and went immediately to my closet.

"Now, let's see…" She started "doot-doo-ing" the _Jeopardy!_ theme song. I didn't know what was wrong with what I was wearing—just some jeans and a button-up shirt. It wasn't like I was trying to go in pajamas. By her second round of the melody I thought I was going to implode, but then she shouted, "EUREKA!"

She had in her hands a black long-sleeve silk dress shirt and a pair of black slacks that my mother bought for me, but I never had reason to wear. Laying on top of them, she had a deep green tie that I had for the same reason.

"Where exactly are we going again?" I started to get nervous. I had never gone to a jazz café before, so I really didn't know what to expect, and the attire was only adding to my paranoia.

"Calm down, Edward, it's totally relaxed. Some people even go in jeans and sweatshirts, but we're regulars there, and we like to dress up a bit. Not too much, just enough." It was only then that I noticed what Alice was wearing. It wasn't too horribly dressy, just a pair of black, stretchy pants that went down to her ankles, some sort of drapey yellow top that I couldn't even begin to describe, and three-inch heels.

"You look very nice, Alice." I smiled at her.

"Easy, Tiger, I don't want to have to sick Jasper on you." She said with a wide grin that told me she was completely joking. "Thank you for the compliment. Get changed." She gave me a wink, and skipped out of the room.

I changed into my costume, and walked out into the living room, to see Alice looking through my movies. She addressed me while still looking in the cabinet.

"You've got a good selection here, Edward. We're going to have to come over some time and have a movie night." Then she turned, and a wide grin slowly spread across her face. "I… am a genius."

"Thanks, Genius, they're _my_ clothes on _me_." It really didn't bother me that she was taking credit, but annoying each other was apparently our new thing. I guessed that this is what having a sibling felt like. I think I rather enjoyed it.

"Oh, don't bother me with trifles. And that tie brings out your eyes, just as I predicted." Another wide grin spread across her face as she marched over to the island in my miniscule kitchen, grabbed my wallet, phone and keys, and held out her arm for me to hook elbows. "Shall we, Handsome?"

I just let out a big sigh, put my arm in hers, and locked the door behind us.

_Who knows? Tonight might be interesting._

vvv

Considering that I had no idea what to expect when I agreed to go along tonight, it actually seemed like I was going to have a lot of fun. I never listened to a lot of jazz, but I always appreciated live music. I only played a little classical piano, and I could read music if I worked at it, but after tonight I'd probably want to go home and plunk around on my keyboard.

The room was large and square, and there were four round couches surrounding each table. It was dim, lit mostly by the small lamps at each table. In the far right corner there was a stage, and the first set had already begun by the time we sat down. Apart from the medium-sized table in the middle, there were four rolling tables that sat between the four couches, completing the circle, and gave the feeling of a very private room. There was a bar along most of the left wall that hit the door that led to the kitchen in the back, and in the center of the right wall there was a fireplace that we were seated by. There was enough heat coming from the fire and the number of bodies in the room, that the doors in the front and the back were left open, which allowed for a nice breeze. It was a very comfortable contrast to the standing temperature. Most everyone kept their jackets or wraps on, and seemed completely at ease.

Apparently on Friday nights there was a two-item minimum per set, but Alice said that if I didn't want to get anything there was no need, that they always bought enough to cover my two items, so it wasn't a big deal.

I was the odd man out, yes. And I was relatively uncomfortable, yes. But it didn't stay that way. The place was designed to make you feel right at home, and it worked. I found myself leaning back on the couch and taking off my coat—I was sitting right next to the fireplace—and decided to have a wonderful-looking fruit tart for dessert, since I had already eaten my leftover Hawaiian pizza for dinner.

We had been there about an hour. I had finished my dessert and was drinking my Sprite when I noticed a vaguely familiar face across the room. I couldn't quite place it, but I think he heard something, because he suddenly looked up and smiled. _Dimples_. I looked in the direction of his gaze, expecting to see Bella, but noticed a blonde bombshell in a deep purple cocktail dress walking right toward him.

She sat down right in the crook of his arm and he gave her a soft kiss on the forehead. They never said anything, only watched the gentlemen performing on stage.

I was very confused. I didn't know whether to be relieved, because apparently the guy was dating _this_ girl and not Bella; upset, because he could possibly be dating _both_; or angry that he _dumped_ Bella and has, in his eyes, moved on to greener pastures. I decided I couldn't be any of those, because I didn't have any information about anything at all, so I just stuck with "confused."

The evening progressed and Alice and Angela had tried to include me in the conversations they had. But I never said much, so they eventually gave up. I didn't mind. I was used to being out of the loop, and they let me come with them and invade their space, so I didn't want to make them feel like they had to baby sit me. I just kept a slight smile on my face, or closed my eyes to listen to the music, and they didn't seem to mind me just being there.

By the time I had about four refills of my Sprite, I decided that it was time for me to go home. I thanked Alice and Angela for inviting me, and I shook Jasper and Ben's hands, and I headed out to my car. I turned to the jazz station on the radio. Not half as good as what I had just experienced, but it would do.

_And Angela didn't mention anything about Bella. You'll have to thank her later for that._

vvv_  
_

The first half of the week passed, and Bella didn't come in. She had said she wouldn't be able to, but each morning I still hoped that she would find the time. She may have found another coffee shop on campus that could make her drink as well as I could… _Naah_. That little fact brightened my spirits a bit.

I left on Wednesday, after I got off of work, to go home for Thanksgiving. My parents lived about an hour northeast of my apartment, a little further from the hustle and bustle of the larger cities. It was quiet, like the country, without the smell of cows. Not that you could smell much in forty degree weather, anyway.

I pulled up the long suburb street lined with bare Maple, Elm, and Birch trees around five in the evening. The city hired people who definitely knew how to make a place beautiful by planting deciduous foliage. We rarely ever got snow, but we did feel the seasons when the leaves would turn, and fall off to paint the streets in hues from red to yellow. Being here during the winter almost made me wish that I hadn't moved out and gone to the college I did. Almost.

Before I even got out of my car, my mom came running out of the house with her farm animal oven mitts still on, and her apron that said, "Kiss my ass. I'M the cook!" I laughed every single time I saw her put that on. Esme was very… motherly, and even slightly conservative, but she still had her wild side. She didn't actually wear it around me until I was in high school because she didn't want to be a bad influence. But rather than washing my mouth out with soap the first time she heard me use profanity, she just gaped at me and laughed.

"Oh, Honey, I missed you so much! You never call me, what in the hell is wrong with you?" She said, as she whacked me lightly with one of her mitts. I think it was a horse. Or a pig, I couldn't really tell. She bought them at a garage sale. I don't ask questions about these things anymore.

She barraged me with questions about my job, school, my social life, what video game I was currently playing, and how much longer I thought I'd take to graduate.

"One at a time, Mom, let's go inside." I looked down at her feet and realized she had only her fuzzy socks on. I rolled my eyes, grabbed my overnight bag, and followed her into the house.

I took a deep breath and it just smelled like the holidays at the Cullen home. Fireplace, cinnamon, cookies, ham, and Jasmine candles. Star Jasmine were my mother's favorite flowers, and for the longest time she couldn't find the scent. She even had _me_ searching through any candle section at every store I happened to be at when I was in high school. Then, one day, she came across a small shop that sold candles and a bunch of other girlie things, and almost bought their entire shipment (actually, she may have attempted it). Now she and the owner are good friends, and she makes sure to keep them in stock for her.

"So Sweetie… How are things? I never hear from you, you really must tell me everything."

I told her how I'd started to hang out with a couple of girls from work, but before she could get too excited, I explained that they both had boyfriends, and they were just really nice. I tiptoed around talking about Bella, even though it was always there, ready to come out, and I was pretty sure she noticed. She was always way too observant when it came to things like that. I told her about the schedule I was hoping to have next semester, and how I wanted to change my shifts around so that I wouldn't be stuck working all weekend. Not that it mattered until now, but I'd like to have the opportunity for a social life, if one ever decided to grace me with its presence.

"So… who is she?" She said with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

_Damnit._

"What are you talking about?" _That's right, play it cool. You don't have to admit anything, because you didn't _say_ anything._

"Edward, please. I have known you your entire life. In fact, I've known you longer than _you_ have, so don't try to pull a fast one on me by telling me that we both don't know exactly what I'm talking about." _And cue "the look"._

"Bella." I sighed, and hung my head, defeated.

"Well, Honey, don't look so downtrodden. Tell me all about it."

So I did. I even got as far as slipping about smelling Bella's hair, and at that, she just laughed out loud. Having that out of the way, I even went as far as telling her about Alice's plan to get me socialized.

"I like this Alice person. You're going to need to introduce me some time." She said, matter-of-factly.

"I'm sure she'd love that. You two would get along very well. You both love shopping." I rolled my eyes at the thought.

"And um… I'm gonna want to meet this Bella sometime, too." She had her eyebrow raised again.

"I don't know, Mom. I haven't even grown a pair to…" I almost choked on my own saliva at the thought. "…to ask her out. And what if I never do? Or what if I do, and she says 'no'? Or what if she laughs at me? Or—"

"Oh, Edward, cut it out. Everyone can see that you're a good catch. Anything that comes between you and Bella is going to entirely depend on you just making a move. And from what you tell me about her, she's not going to laugh at you or say 'no.' At the very least, she'll give you a chance. Who knows, you may not end up liking _her_. Ever thought of that?"

I gave out a loud guffaw. Me, not like Bella?

_Right._

"Exactly." She stated, satisfied she'd made her point. "So what makes you think that she won't like you if you guys already get along so well?"

No one could ever accuse Esme of mincing words. She got to the chase, always treated me like an equal when it counted, and I appreciated her, so much, for that. It was nice to know that when it came down to it, she wouldn't tell me that everything was going to be butterflies and rainbows, and all I had to do was "follow my heart." I think I heard her say once that that was a "flying bowl of monkey shit." I think that also still falls under the category of being one of the funniest things I had heard anyone say, and it came from my mother.

It was then that I heard the door opening, and my dad walked in.

"Look, Carlisle, the Prodigal is home." She said as she walked into the foyer and kissed him soundly. I couldn't understand how I had become so awkward with relaxed parents such as these.

"How's it going, Edward? Long time no see. You never call, what the hell is up with that?" He said with his arms still around his wife. I was definitely planning on calling them more often, if this was the reception I was going to get.

We had dinner, and I ended up repeating the story to Carlisle, with Esme interjecting her own commentary this time. He pretty much ended up telling me the same thing as she did, but he added something.

"Edward… did you know that I was painfully shy growing up?" He looked at the ham on the end of his fork before placing it in his mouth.

"Um… no?" Carlisle had always been the model of assertiveness and not the least bit shy, at least that I had witnessed.

"I was. All the way up until college, actually. Even through my undergraduate studies I usually kept to myself, and didn't get out much. I focused on my work, and that was pretty much it."

"Well, what happened?" I prompted. Esme just looked lovingly between us with a small smile on her face, and then went back to eating.

"I got into medical school. I was thrown into a tank of sharks, and if I hadn't come out on top, then I wouldn't have come out. I was in one of my practicals that we had to simulate an emergency operation, and the adrenaline pumping through me could have either overtaken me and marked my end as a surgeon, or work as a catalyst to push me forward. So rather than trying to work through the nerves I was facing, I allowed the hormone to do what it is meant to do in our bodies: heighten senses, and assist the ability to focus more clearly on whatever is going on. That's why med school's so difficult: if you can't handle the pressure, then people die. So I started yelling at the mock nurses and telling them exactly what I needed, and I completed my task. I already knew what I had to do, it was just a matter of doing what I had to… to just do it."

I just sat there for a few minutes, taking in what he had said. People weren't going to die because of my lack of wit, but I knew what he meant. It took him a traumatic experience to get over his hurdle. I still wasn't exactly sure how I could apply this to my life, but I'd keep it in mind.

_Yeah. _Definitely_ be sure to call them more often.

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_

**So let me know what you thought about Carlisle and Esme. We have a bit more interaction with them in the next chapter, so don't fret, Lovelies!**

**Oh, and if you want some serious entertainment, check out www[.]popsuede[.]com. This guy does lolcatz for Twilight and other movies. I don't normally enjoy them this much, but he puts some really nice effort into it, and it cracked me up. Enjoy!**

**I love all of your comments, and I really do reply to all of them. So if you have a question, or even if you just want to say "hi!" then go ahead and drop a line. Let us know you're out there! And seriously, you all should be reading the comments after reading each chapter, too. Some of them are quite funny. It's a good way to make friends, too!**

**So… whoever comments gets an Esme apron! Woohoo!**


	7. Chapter 7

**So thanks to Onion (Sparks), who always has wonderful things to say about everything, even the unedited versions of this mess of a story. Thank you so much to Crack Spider (Jana), to whom I am her bitch. But I'm the Devil! And she is my minion, so go figure… it's a complicated relationship. And to Cora, whom I have no nickname for. Although that should change.**

**And tonight, you can thank Ren for not having me wait until tomorrow morning to post this. Everyone say "Thank you, Ren!"

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**

Esme ended up dragging me shopping at the ungodly hour of 5 a.m. for Black Friday. Let's just say that I was glad my mommy was there to protect me. Those people are crazy, and I literally feared for my life more than once. Carlisle just laughed when I opened the door and ran straight for him, whispering, "Don't let her take me out there again! It was madness! Madness, I tell you!"

While we were out, I bought a new controller for my Xbox. When I asked Esme if we could make a stop for me to buy a new pair of glasses, she decided she'd get them as part of my Christmas gift.

_Ah, the benefits of shopping with parents._

We had Thanksgiving leftovers that night while we discussed our Crappy Secret Santa that we did every year. It wasn't exactly secret, but it certainly was crappy. It became a tradition when I was in seventh grade. I thought it would be hilarious to get my mom a gag gift for Christmas, but it didn't occur to me to actually buy a real gift, in addition to it. So when she opened up the Almond Roca can and four springy snakes popped out instead, she decided to get me back the next year, and put rocks in PlayStation 2 packaging. I didn't even know she had done it until I took off all of the Styrofoam, but she wasn't as mean as I was: she had just hidden the console in the garage.

It slowly evolved each year until it became what it was then, which was one person grabbing a name at random, and then (since there were only three of us) that determined who the other two had. This year, I got Esme. I had a four weeks before Christmas to make a few trips to some different secondhand stores and obscure gift shops. I had no idea what I was going to get, but I wanted to make it good.

vvv

Despite having to beat through crowds with a stick, I felt quite a bit better after coming back from Thanksgiving weekend with my parents. They gave me a lot of good insight into their personalities, and therefore mine. It didn't mean that it would fix everything right away, but at least it gave me something else to think about.

But the remnant feeling from being with my parents slowly waned and dissipated.

Bella didn't show up all week. Apparently the whole "out of sight, out of mind" cliché didn't apply to me, because it only got worse as time progressed.

I was particularly irritable by Friday, and Alice noticed. It didn't help that Angela was still getting over being sick, so Jessica had to cover for her. But rather than burdening Alice with her, I just sent Jessica home when Alice came on, and I finished out Angela's shift until noon.

_You're getting angry over something that won't be helped. It's not everyone else's fault you're not getting any. Knock it off._

"Come out with us tonight. You seemed to be really comfortable last time, after a while. And Angela might not come tonight, so it'll be nice for Ben to have someone else there, so he doesn't feel like the third wheel with me and Jasper."

I eyed her suspiciously. She was trying to guilt me into coming. She sure didn't mind making me the fifth wheel when I went along with them, and Ben was far more outgoing than I was.

"No, I don't think so. I'll just bug everyone. I'm not in a good mood today."

"Suit yourself. But try to make an effort to not close yourself off to people who care about you, okay? If you're in a bad mood, your own brain isn't always the best place to stay camped out, you know?"

"Alright, Alice." I agreed, hoping that she'd just drop the subject.

Just then, a group of people walked in that successfully silenced that conversation. That kept us busy for a couple hours, and, thankfully, she didn't bring it up again.

vvv

I left once Eric got there to relieve me at noon and close for the night. He gave me grief for sending Jessica home early and staying myself, since she was clearly cheaper labor than me. This was not a regular occurrence, and he knew it. _Prick._ I just held the urge to roll my eyes at bay, and left without retorting.

I drove home in silence. I never did that. I always had some sort of music to listen to, whether it was classical, rock, oldies, indie, or now, jazz. Apparently my brain was loud enough to keep me completely mentally occupied the entire ride home. I didn't say coherent, just loud.

I noticed that the longer I was in a bad mood, the messier my apartment became. I walked in the door to my dirty dishes in the sink, my living room littered with Sprite cans, jerky packages and movie covers missing their DVDs. I made my way through the hallway and took a glance in my room. It basically looked like someone took the entire room and shook it up like a snow globe, except all the furniture was still upright.

_Man. You're out of it for a week, and your whole place blows up. What the heck?_

I took the entire afternoon just cleaning. It was around 7 p.m. when I could actually say that it was pretty much spotless. I had even cleaned all the grime out of the bathroom. I gathered all my laundry and dragged it across the street to the laundromat and then had a piece of pizza while I was waiting.

I got back to my apartment a couple hours later, and realized I had nothing left to do. I folded and hung my clothes right out of the dryer, and it only took me a few seconds to put everything away.

It was weird that playing _Halo_ wasn't the first thing that came to my mind.

I went to the couch and turned on the console, but while it was booting, I realized I didn't _want_ to play. Not right now, anyway.

vvv

I called Alice and met up with them at around 9:20. Angela was even feeling well enough to come along, and she greeted me with a small smile.

"I like your new glasses, Edward. They definitely suit your face better than your last pair." Alice said, as if it weren't her idea. Maybe she was saving me embarrassment from people knowing I was her pet project.

I had just put on what I wore the last time, since I didn't feel like playing dress up again, and this was a safe choice. Alice chastised me for committing a fashion faux pas, but I just ignored her. Yeah, it was a lot like having a little sister. Except I think she was older than I. Oh, well.

It wasn't entirely like last time. I only had a single piece of pizza earlier, so I ordered a grilled panini, that was absolutely wonderful, and a Sprite. The band was incredible, as I now came to expect from this venue, and we sat at the same table. It was nice coming along with regulars who received special treatment.

I looked over, and even Dimples was in the same spot he was before.

_Oh. Guess he's a regular, too._

Also, just like last time, he looked up from his drink and put it down on the table to his left. One thing that was not like last time was the party that he greeted. Arm-in-arm with the bombshell blonde from last time, was Bella. And she was absolutely exquisite.

_Woah._

She wore black shoes that hardly had any heel, but clicked anyway, a flowing skirt that landed right below her knee, and a dark blue sleeveless top. The neckline draped low, and fell between her breasts perfectly, but not low enough to reveal any actual cleavage. She had her hair up in a loose bun with the pieces that were cut too short hanging in waves around her perfect face.

I didn't realize I had stopped breathing until Alice noticed her, too.

"Oh, it's Bella! _Bella!_" She called out, and I almost strangled her. I hadn't seen Bella in weeks, and was not expecting her to be here.

Conveniently, I started to feel lightheaded and sick.

"Hey, guys, I'm really not feeling well. I think I must have eaten my panini too quickly. I'm just… gonna… go." Angela saw me and gave me a look that made me feel bad for _myself_. I got up and walked out as quickly as possible, praying to High Heaven that Bella didn't notice me.

I drove home in silence, again. I was so angry with my behavior. There was no reason for me to have panicked like that. I tried to convince myself that the reason I suddenly felt sick was really because of the panini, and _not_ that it was going to come up just because I was a pansy for seeing a girl. I didn't buy it for a second.

When I got home, I just stripped on the way to my room, leaving a trail of clothes on the floor, and fell asleep in my boxers and socks. I did _not_ sleep soundly.

* * *

**All together now, guys, "Awwww…"**

**When Jana wrote me back about this chapter, one of the things she said was, "I got all impatient with Edward being such a chicken... I mean, geeeeeez, she's looking hot, you're all prettied up, give it a f-ing go!" Hahahaha. Ah, my friends definitely keep my sides splitting.**

**Speaking of commenting, ("What are you talking about, Kelly, no one said anything—" "Shut up.") what do you think the relationship is between everyone? There are a lot of things happening behind the scenes that no one is actually seeing except me (and Cora knows a few things), so tell me what YOU think is going on! Speculation, maybe, about what they talked about after Edward ran from there like a bat outta hell. *taps chin, looking thoughtfully* Hmmm… I might just have to write some parallels to this.**

**So… time to tell me how much you hate me for cockblocking you again. Go ahead. I can take it. I think. *hides in the bathroom***


	8. Chapter 8

**Alright… I would have felt completely horrible just leaving you guys hanging after putting you through this for so long… So here's chapter 8, but I have to make an admission. I'm going to be perpetually working on this story, so have no fear, but I might be taking a little longer than usual to get each post out. I'm really putting a strain on my betas by just sending them chapter after chapter, and not giving them a damn break. So no sweat, it'll probably just be a few days between posts, rather than one a day. Man, I've spoiled you rotten!**

**One suggestion as to how to read this chapter: Bella does not have a hangover, nor is she drunk, but that's a pretty good description of how she's acting. This is how I get every once in a while when I'm so totally exhausted and haven't had my morning coffee. I have slurred speech, and I get giggly. Well, "giggly" as long as I don't have anything pressing to do. Anyway, just imagine her saying all this as if she was drunk. lol. What a way to preface the chapter, huh?

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**

I woke up and decided that what I had done was completely childish, and stupid. I mean, really, what could I have possibly done that would have made me look like more of an idiot than just leaving like that? I had even gone too far for me, and I had reached my breaking point.

_It's about time._

For a few minutes, I just laid in bed and tried to think through what happened. Well, one, I hadn't seen Bella in a while, and that was a huge part of it. But then I tried to think of other reasons, and nothing really stuck out. So… maybe that was it. Maybe Alice was right, and I just needed to get used to feeling comfortable. Despite pretty much being an ass all week from brooding over not seeing Bella, I was starting to feel a lot more comfortable in my own skin. More than I had in a long time… or ever.

Then I thought about what Carlisle had told me about letting the adrenaline do what it was supposed to do. Any time my heart started to race and my hands began to sweat, I took "flight" over "fight", always. And the primary reason for that, was because the "fight" response left me embarrassed. So what did Alice say I should do? Laugh at myself? I was sure it didn't mean breaking out into a fit of giggles every time I did something stupid. It was just learning how to make light of a situation when it really wasn't the end of the world.

_Even so, think you can do that?_

_Guess you'll find out soon enough._

vvv_  
_

"Morning, Eric." I said a generically friendly greeting before beginning my Saturday mid-shift. I was determined to get Saturdays off in the Spring, and actually make Eric work his whole 10-hour shift, rather than skipping out early, like he usually did.

I walked into the back room and saw Angela getting out our featured seasonal coffee flavorings, and I hesitated for a few moments.

"Good morning, Angela." I was rather timid in addressing her, since she was full witness to my embarrassing cop-out the night before, and unlike everyone else, knew the exact reason why.

"Good morning, Edward! I hope you're… _feeling _a bit better this morning, and that panini didn't bother you too horribly." She said it in a way that was giving me the option of whether or not I wanted to talk about the elephant in the room.

I just let it out.

"Oh, you _know_ what happened. I was a chicken. A complete chicken. She just walked into the room, and I choked. I didn't even talk to her. I didn't even get to tell her… how gorgeous she looked or… how she lit up the entire room as if she had simply flicked the light switch on. I just… I can't… _UGH_! I am just so ANGRY with myself!" I sat down at the desk and ran my hand over my head.

Angela just gave me a small smile and took the bottles to the front. She knew she'd have an entire shift to hear me complain, although I wasn't planning on it. I was already tired of complaining, it was just that I needed someone to verbalize my frustration to, momentarily. The rest of the day, hopefully, would be me figuring out what to do about it.

vvv

Angela and I had been working nonstop since Eric ended up leaving at eleven, an hour after I clocked in. It wasn't that we were bogged down with customers, it was that half of the good employees were out at a little jazz café_—Well, _some_ of them were leaving because they have no spine_—and that left the not-so-good employees—_cough-Mike-and-Lauren-cough_—to close on Friday night, leaving a large number of things left for the Saturday morning crew to fix.

By around one, we were both ready to take our half-hour breaks, so Angela insisted that I go first. I went to the back room and grabbed the book I was still reading for that Intro to Sociology class, and sat at one of the tables in the lobby.

At precisely the time I opened my book, Bella trudged through the door, looking like she hadn't slept very well, at all. _Well, that makes two of us._ It was a complete one-eighty from the previous evening, even though she still looked as beautiful as ever.

She didn't notice me, and I watched her drag her feet to the register, where Angela stood with a very amused look on her face. It was actually Angela's expression that stopped me from being too worried about what could possibly be wrong with Bella.

She mumbled her usual order, but Angela didn't even bother ringing it up. A free coffee now and then always does some emotional good, and we all knew it.

After receiving her drink and taking a couple sips, Bella turned around and saw me with my book in my hand. She continued to drag her feet on her way to sit by me, but this time with a contented smile on her face, holding her grey knit sweater closed with one hand, and her coffee close to her torso with the other.

"Hello. I'm Exhausted-and-Caffeine-Deprived. And you are?" She held out her hand in greeting, letting her sweater fall open to reveal a lavender form-fitting top.

I decided that then was the time to put New Edward into practice, so I took my time with my response to not stumble on the words.

"Uhh… On-a-Break-and-Reading. Nice to meet you, Exhausted." I took her hand, and the electric current that I had felt before was strong, but still bearable, and very pleasant. After a couple seconds I let go of her hand, and she sat down in the chair across from me. It seemed that almost-unconscious-Bella was a little less intimidating than bright-eyed-and-bushy-tailed-Bella, which helped a lot.

"Mmmm… It really _is_ a good book. I like the end. I think _you'll_ like it." She took another sip of her drink, while I was just contented in being totally entertained by her slurred speech. "You know… I haven't been in, because I have been sooooo busy with… school, and moving, and homework, and… moving… and… grading papers for Mrs. Ramirez, and moving, and… yes." She nodded her head a single time. "And you know what? _No one _else can make my coffee. I tried going to the place on campus, and they _suck_. Plus, it's a neeeeew person… eeeeeeeveryday. So then I have to explain it to them over and over, and they just don't understand. Why don't they understand? _You_ understand."

I was just silently chuckling and nodding in response until she came to her last statement.

"Oh. So _I_ can do it, therefore everyone should be able to. Is that what you're saying?" I looked at her in mock annoyance.

She didn't say anything, she just took her fist and gently nudged my shoulder, and kept drinking her coffee.

"You know, Edward, I think you should join my study group. By the looks of things you should be finished with that book by Monday, and we meet Monday and Wednesday. I'd really like to hear what you think about the ending, and I'm sure you have papers to do, and-or finals to study for."

I sat there, wide-eyed and stunned. That was completely unexpected.

"Or… you know… you don't _have_ to." She said, looking at me curiously. I didn't realize I had been sitting there for almost 8 seconds.

"Oh, no, I mean… Yes! I do… um… where?" I scrambled, not willing to miss this opportunity.

She took the receipt I used as a bookmark, and stood up. Still walking sluggishly, but not quite as much as before, she went to grab a pen from the counter, and came back. Writing down the address and time to meet, she stuck the receipt back into the book on the table, and handed me the pen.

"Okie dokie… Now that I've got my life-support for the day, I do believe I have to get home and continue unpacking boxes. Rose already has all of her shit put away, and she's getting on my case about it, now." Standing up, she let out a yawn, and rubbed her eye with the heel of her palm. She took a deep breath and pushed it out in a big huff. "Okay. I'll see you Monday, Edward. Oh, and I like your new glasses."

She smiled and started walking toward the door, when I finally let out a breathy, "Monday, Bella."

Fortunately for me, my break was over. I don't think I would have been able to concentrate on anything that required higher brain function at that point. My brain was working on Bella-overdrive, and I couldn't stop grinning like a complete imbecile.

I let Angela go on her break immediately after, and was grateful that I didn't have to deal with more than a few customers before she got back.

She just let me grin away, and took orders while I made drinks.

vvv

"Why didn't I know about this? Where was I?" Alice demanded.

"Not… here?" I teased her a bit. Alice was always in-the-know about everything, and she was just upset that this somehow flew under her radar.

She had come in the next morning, quite a bit earlier than usual for a Monday, claiming that she had figured out _exactly_ why I had left so suddenly on Friday, and questioned why I hadn't bothered to charge my phone, because she couldn't get a hold of me.

"Edward Cullen, I can't believe you didn't tell me about this. I thought we were friends! _Good_ friends! You can't just NOT tell good friends about things like this!"

"It all sort of just… happened, Alice, I don't know what to tell you. It's not like I'm going out on a date with her. She asked me to a study group. With other people. Hardly the setting if she really had any interest in me." I knew all of this: That Bella couldn't possibly be interested in me, and that she really was simply intrigued by what my response was going to be to the ending of that book. But it didn't remotely help with the grin that was now permanently etched on my face.

"Yeah, right. Edward, this is totally huge! You _have_ to ask her out. You two would be soooooo cute together!" She started bouncing up and down.

"Not helping, Alice. Believe me. If—" I was cut off by none other than Bella walking in the door.

Alice went into the back room and brought out Angela so that she could ring-up Bella's drink, as I started making it.

"So, Edward, did you finish it?" She asked in anticipation, and I nodded in response. "Well, then you'll have to tell me all about it tonight, ok?" She raised her eyebrows and smiled.

"Absolutely." I said, possibly with a little too much intensity. I still had so much difficulty when trying to gauge myself around her. It didn't help that I had an audience that just added to my self-consciousness.

As I was finishing her drink, Alice pulled Angela into the back room. I handed Bella her coffee, and she waved goodbye and walked out the door.

I followed the two girls into the back room, and caught them huddled close together, whispering and snickering about what I could only imagine to involve Bella and myself. It was strange thinking that way, knowing people saw us as something more than individuals. It made me giddy, there was no other way to explain it. I was connected with her through that, even though she didn't know it, and although it was slightly embarrassing being giggled about, that connection was so real, it was almost tangible.

I wasn't _with_ Bella, but at the very least she wanted to hang out, and that was a good enough consolation for me.

_For now.

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_

**Alright. Time to review. Believe me, the more reviews I get, the more motivation I have to write. That's not a threat, just the truth. So if you guys think it's lame, then don't say anything. If you like it, then please comment. I really love to hear from you guys! And let me know if you want to see everyone's clothes, and Esme's cooking apparel!**


	9. Chapter 9

**There is absolutely no way I can properly thank my betas for helping me through these next few chapters. Nights spent almost in hysterics because Edward and Bella were just either playing too nicely together, or making too much noise, or just being all-around pains-in-the-patoot.**

**Sparks, you just sit there and virtually pat my head and say "It's going to be okay!" and listen to me vent about all the bullshit that's going on in my head! It is a rather confusing place, too, which makes you not only awesome, but a very brave soul. :)**

**Cora, you rock my socks. You pretty much took all of the jumbled mess that were these next chapters, and said, "Oh, just do this, and this, and this, and voilà!" And everything fell into place, and I feel pretty dumb for just not waiting to talk to you about it instead of having a freaking panic attack. So yeah. Thanks. Hehehe.**

**(Oh, and she also basically wrote Alice's rant. We were chatting on the phone, and it all just came out so perfectly, I told her she had to.)**

**Jana, you're just plain awesome. You don't even like fan fiction, but you read mine and Cora's cause you kick major ass. And you have wonderful opinions. And we make awesome pumpkin pie. And we're totally going to the Eclipse premiere in June. And yeah.**

**There was totally something else I forgot to put in my long-ass a/n, but I'll put it in the next one.**

**Woohoo for majorly kick-butt betas!

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**

After she and Angela traded notes, Alice continued to lecture me about not keeping her in the loop.

"Seriously, Edward, how could you not tell me about Bella? When I originally asked to help you, I specifically said that I wanted to help you with girls. Lo and behold, there's a specific girl that you're interested in and you neglect to mention it? What am I, chopped liver? How am I supposed to help you if you don't keep me informed? All this time, we could have been working toward a specific goal! Just think of all the time we've wasted! By now, you two could have been in Vegas eloping or down in Jamaica vacationing together – at the very least you could know more about her than the way she likes her coffee!"

Angela had tried to rein her in, but I just brushed it off. I was way too excited about the evening to come, and I knew she didn't mean any harm by it. It was actually kind of entertaining.

It was nice having people that I could trust. And they were girls, on top of it, which was really interesting… you know… for me. The few real friends that I had through school moved away to go to different colleges. Anyone else I had acquired never really showed any interest in finding anything deep about each other. It wasn't like we needed to have sleepovers and paint each others' toenails, but the guys I infrequently hung out with all thought a "good time" consisted of playing video games and downloading porn.

vvv

I escaped my Biology Lab about a half hour early, which allowed me to avoid the between-class traffic, and make it home by 6:15 p.m.. I realized I had nothing to do except work on my paper for Intro to Bio. It was a mindless activity, but time-consuming. After writing for almost two solid hours, I was almost finished, and glanced at the clock.

_8:06. You're late!_

I quickly gathered my books and binder, and made my way to the address that Bella had written on my makeshift bookmark.

It actually wasn't far from the store, which made finding it fairly simple. I took the elevator to the fourth floor of the apartment building, turned the corner, and made the few steps down to 402. It was a very nice complex and had the feel of a hotel, with the hallways carpeted with rich fabric, and I suddenly wondered whose place it was. It couldn't have possibly been Bella's.

I knocked soundly three times, and the door was opened, almost immediately, by a football-type guy, about my height, with a quizzical look on his face.

"Yes? What can I do for you?" He said, crossing his arms.

"Um… is… Bella here? Uh… Bella invited me. Is this where the study group meets?" I would have felt horrible if I actually had knocked on the wrong door. She was kind of out of it when she gave me the information.

I heard a voice yell from inside, "Edward, come on in!" A second later, I saw Bella walking toward the door. "Tyler, this is Edward, the one that works at the coffee shop?"

"Oh!" His demeanor completely changed, and reached out to shake my hand with a smile on his face. "Sorry, Man. Bella, here, thought maybe you forgot." He moved to the side and let me walk in, while Bella made her way back to the stack of notes she was pouring through. I tried really hard not to stare at her ass. It only kind of worked.

"No, no, I didn't forget." Inside I was laughing hysterically at the thought, but just let out a low chuckle. "I just… lost track of time. You know… uh… riveting papers and such." I ran my hand over my head, and readjusted my glasses.

"Yeah, I feel ya." He patted me—well, "hit" me is more like it, being that I almost had the wind knocked out of me—on the back. "Trust me, we're all in the same boat. So just sit anywhere, make yourself comfortable. There's pizza, chicken wings, soda and beer in the kitchen, whatever you like. If you come regularly, we trade off bringing the food, but we can talk about that later."

I noticed that there were three other people sitting on the floor, but didn't really see them. There was a wide open spot right next to Bella, so I walked in her direction. I put my things down, and looked at what she was working on.

"So—" I was immediately cut-off by a vaguely familiar voice.

"Hi, Edward."

I turned around and saw a pair of blue eyes surrounded by long, strawberry-blonde curls.

If there was anyone I _didn't_ want to see, it was her. We had been in the same Intermediate Statistics class in the Spring. I would be shocked if she actually passed, with the amount of time she spent trying to hit on me. Although at first, her persistence was flattering—since it was in spite of my dorkiness that she did so persist—it became all too apparent to me that she was just shallow. I had seen her on campus openly making out with guys, and rarely were they every the same one.

"Oh, hello, Tanya." I had to be polite, I was in—I assumed, since he opened the door—Tyler's house, and we were his guests. She was, interestingly enough, the only girl I was not ever intimidated by, and I think it was because I didn't feel like I had to impress her.

"How did you do in Stats last semester?" I looked at her face, and it seemed sincere. That confused me. Maybe she had simply changed over the summer, but I still answered hesitantly.

"Um, I passed. I'm pretty good at the program, so it was fairly easy. I just used 'F1' for 'Help' a lot." I gave out a short laugh. It was true. Most people don't understand the value of a good "Help" search on computer programs. That's what it's freaking there for.

"Oh, I passed, too. Just barely." She smiled again.

She really did seem like a completely different Tanya than the one who made a pass at me almost every day, the previous semester. And I was the last person who should be judging anyone about changing themselves, so I decided that I would try to be nice, and pretend like none of it ever happened.

I turned to face Bella, who just had a strange look on her face, her eyes bouncing between Tanya and myself. The look wasn't angry, but it wasn't positive, either. More like she was confused about the interaction all together. I really didn't have that much experience reading her faces… although I was willing to try, for the rest of my life.

_Oh, brother. Don't count your chickens before they hatch, Shakespeare._

I heard Bella's stomach rumbling. I didn't eat before I came, and so I was ravenous, too.

"Bella, are you hungry? I can grab you a slice of pizza..."

"Um… It's fine. I can get it." She got up, and headed for the kitchen.

She actually seemed rather uncomfortable, and it didn't make sense. Had I done something? Did I take up the space she was planning on using for her work? Everyone else was deep in study-mode, and Tanya looked unconcerned as she went back to her own work.

Once I reached Bella, though, I didn't know what I was supposed to do, and suddenly I was nervous. _Well, you came in here because you were hungry, right? _This was the first time that Bella and I had actually been alone in a room that wasn't the store. My heart began to race at the thought, and my palms got sweaty faster than I thought possible.

She looked distracted. Like her actions were on auto-pilot, and her brain was somewhere else, entirely. Despite my nervousness, I was really starting to worry about her.

"Bella… are you okay?" I wracked my brain, trying to imagine what could have possibly happened between greeting me at the door and getting up to go to the kitchen, to make her demeanor change so quickly.

"I'm fine. Here." She handed me a paper plate and gave me a tight smile.

"Oh. O-okay." I said, lamely.

She put a slice of veggie pizza on her plate and took a can of lemon-lime Shasta, and walked back into the living room.

It occurred to me that I didn't know her that well, and that gave me limited options as to how to proceed without prying. A few moments later, Tanya came in and caught me totally zoned out.

"Hey, Kid, you okay?" She giggled lightly. For whatever reason, "Kid" was always her nickname for me, even though we were the same age. It didn't bother me much, it was just a bit condescending. "Don't worry about Bella, she's sort of been feeling off all evening." She came over, grabbed a plate and a reached for a slice of veggie pizza, brushing my arm with hers. "Everyone's coming in to get more food, it's making me hungry!" She laughed again, and then started to walk out of the kitchen. "You coming?"

I just put a slice of the cheese pizza on my plate and followed her out. Bella's head shot up when I came back in, but she just gave me the same uncomfortable look, and went back to her notes.

The rest of the night consisted of Tanya making random comments about the Stats class, and Bella almost ignoring me. Well, okay, she wasn't ignoring me, she just wasn't making conversation. Which would have been fine, since we were here under the pretense of studying anyway, but the silence almost seemed forced.

"It's getting late, we should—Oh, _damnit!_ Tyler, I'm sorry, could you give me a ride? I forgot that Rose wasn't going to be here tonight to take me home." She looked exhausted.

_Um… offering to give her a ride might be nice. _

_Yeah._

"Bella, I can take you… you know, if you want." I quickly said before Tyler had a chance to respond.

"Hey, Man, that would be great! I have to be here to kick the rest of these guys out, soon, anyhow."

She cringed a bit, even though I could tell she tried to hide it. I didn't realize I was such a poor alternative. It was disconcerting.

_Just a little._

"Yeah, alright, are you ready to go?" It was the longest sentence she'd said to me all night and she didn't even look me in the eye.

I started to quickly put all of my things into a manageable pile, and stood up.

"Sure, let's go."

* * *

**So I get a subscription from Allrecipes[.]com, and it's so awesome, because you can choose what newsletters to subscribe to… So I get the QuickTips, and Baking, and Cookies, and Holidays, and a bunch of other things that I get really excited about in cooking and such. And the other day I got this one about Food Gifts. You know, like munchable things that you can make, and cut up, and give as presents instead of buying expensive shit, because I'm cheap and I totally don't enjoy spending money on things. And that had absolutely nothing to do with the chapter, but I thought you'd appreciate it, anyway. :-D**

**Lemme know if you liked the chapter, okay? The more reviews I get, the more incentive I have for writing, because, believe it or not, it's getting SUPER hard to work through ExB's issues now. *sigh* Also… I've already told a few of you when I've responded to your comments, but I'll probably be making an announcement for the next chapter I post. Woohoo, comments! *runs to bake cookies in Esme apparel***

**Hopefully I will have chapter 10 up in a couple days, so please don't fret, Lovelies!**

**~(You can stop reading here unless you want to be entertained some more)~**

**If you haven't seen Prep & Landing, the new Disney Christmas short, I highly recommend it. Made me cry. But that's 'cause I'm a sap. Haha.**

**www[.]hulu[.]com[/]watch[/]113712[/]disney-prep-and-landing-prep-and-landing**


	10. Chapter 10

**Here is another chapter that was a complete mess until my betas came along and fixed them. *bows head in humble gratitude* It is completely different than its original draft, and for that, I am eternally grateful. 'Cause it was mush.**

**There are a good 70 of you who read the last chapter within 2 hours of me posting it, and another 25 of you within 2 more. You have NO idea how exciting that is to me! Seriously, I want to hear from all of you—if you like it, let me know what you like. What's your reaction? I wanna hear what parts you laugh at (Jana calls them "giggly" parts), and what parts make your jaw drop. Cora laughed SOOO hard when Edward just jet from the club with basically a "See ya." She said, "I had to read it again and I was like, 'Did he really just do that?' *guffaw*"**

**So yeah. It's the small things that make me happy. On to the chapter!

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**

We walked out to my Volvo, and I opened the door for her. She got in and said a quiet "Thank you."

I got in the driver's seat, and asked her where we were going.

"Oh, um… It's just a few miles down the road. Right where 4th ends at Pioneer."

"You're kidding." I gawked at her. There was no way that she had moved just around the block from me.

"Nooo… Why?" She furrowed her eyebrows in question.

"Just that I live in the apartments right across from the Laundromat."

"Oh." She responded, her face now mirroring mine.

The whole ride was silent. I don't know what she was thinking, but I was trying my best to _not _think about things like how her scent was quickly filling up the car, or how her face looked while it was softly glowing by the light from my dashboard.

When I pulled up to the street parking across from our apartments, I turned off the car and realized that I had no idea what I was supposed to do. It wasn't like we were on a date, but I did drive her home. Regardless of the scenario, I didn't want to make it completely platonic, because I actually wanted a chance with her.

_Adrenaline is… good. Yes. Good thing. Adrenaline is good things. Wait… what?_

_Well, better say something before she gets out._

I was still concerned about the way she had acted all evening, so I figured that would be a good place to start.

"I'm sorry you weren't feeling well tonight, Bella. But are you okay?" I unbuckled my seat belt and leaned my back against my door to face her.

"Who said I wasn't feeling well?"

"Oh, um… Tanya said that you had been kind of out of it all night."

"_Tanya _said _what_?" She suddenly looked like she wished she could shoot daggers from her eyes, but then quieted herself before she continued. "Well… um… do—" She stopped, probably trying to phrase whatever she was going to say before it came out. "How well do you know Tanya?"

I didn't _know _if this was Bella questioning Tanya's integrity, but it sure sounded like it to me. In this situation, I knew complete honesty was the best policy.

"Well, if you couldn't tell, we had a class together last semester." I was slightly embarrassed that I was going to tell Bella about another girl. "She kind of hit on me the whole time. It got rather tiresome, actually. I knew what kind of person she was, with a new guy every week… or hour, for that matter." I ran my hand over my head. "I was surprised to see her at your study group, that's for sure. But then, tonight, she was a completely different person. As if none of it actually happened. So I figured there was no reason to hold it against her if she really has changed."

A series of emotions played on her face, as if she was having an argument with herself.

"Just be careful, okay?" She said sharply. I couldn't tell if she was angry with me, or something else entirely. In fact, the suggestion didn't even make much sense within the context. "I'm sorry… um… I think I should go inside."

She began to unlock her seatbelt, and I quickly got out and reached her door, just as she had opened it. I closed the door behind her, and followed her to the gate.

The frustration I'd seen in Bella's eyes earlier had come back with a vengeance, and she was having a hard time finding the key for the lock. After a few seconds, she dropped them. She shut her eyes and took a deep breath to calm herself, but it didn't seem to work.

Without even thinking about what I was doing, I put my hand on her shoulder. She visibly relaxed as soon as I touched her, and I had to ignore the fact that my heart suddenly tried to beat its way out of my chest.

"Bella."

She swallowed, and her eyebrows knit together, but she didn't look at me. I held her shoulder a little more firmly and turned her to see more of her face. Her face was flushed, and I could feel her heart rate increase under my thumb.

"Bella?" I would have given anything to tell what she was thinking. Instead, I had to wait. I didn't know what to say, or what I was supposed to ask to get her to give me more than a few non-committal words in response.

_You are the last person who should be worrying about other people not talking enough._

"Edward, what if… I mean, um… How…" She swallowed again. Her breathing was labored, and I could see each puff of humidity hit the cold air. She was probably getting cold out here trying to ease my mind.

_You could try to do something about that, but that would actually require guts. Of which you have none._

_Focus!_

Bella remained silent for a few moments, and then said, "I really should be going inside. It's uh… getting pretty cold." She held my gaze while she took her left hand to place on mine, which was still on her shoulder. The electricity between us was still very palpable. She took another deep breath, except this time she really did seem to be calmed. She gave me a small smile, and finally said, "Goodnight, Edward." I let my hand fall to my side.

She reached down to pick up her keys, took a couple seconds to find the one to the gate, opened it, and walked inside. I watched her until she reached her apartment, and closed the door behind her.

I just stood there a few more moments and realized that almost nothing—well, okay, _nothing_—made any sense to me. I just had no idea what to do. We had seemingly ended on a positive note, but Bella was obviously upset, and she wouldn't give me any reason, whatsoever. Even the couple times she had started to explain (or so I thought), she would stop herself and replace it with nothing.

I had waited this long, already. I could stand being in the dark a little longer.

vvv

I spent all Tuesday morning finishing my Biology paper and deep-cleaning my car. But that didn't take me very long, and it was only 11:00 a.m.. I thought maybe I would visit Alice during her mid-shift, but then remembered that she opened Tuesdays and went straight to school afterward, so that idea went out the window.

I walked into my kitchen, and realized I desperately needed to take inventory of what resources I actually had available to me. Whenever I went to go cook for myself here, I found I was always missing something.

Since moving out, I missed my parents' kitchen. Over the years, they had acquired just about anything that you could ever use to manipulate any kind of food product. They even had an egg slicer. Not that we often needed to display perfectly portioned slices of boiled egg, but it was comforting knowing that it was there, because it meant they had everything else.

I took notes of what I needed to buy off the top of my head.

_Plastic spatula. Glass baking dishes. A frying pan _without _the lining scraped off from metal utensil abuse. A whisk. A ladle. A cast-iron skillet. And a Crock Pot would be handy._

A few of them were pretty big expenses. It wasn't urgent enough for me to go out and break my bank _today_, but at least I had a list going.

I went to the store and got myself a cart, and started on my normal route through the aisles. Normally I'd just look at everything and pick up things that looked interesting, or convenient, or necessary.

I got to the breakfast aisle, and froze. Bella was leaning against her cart, facing away from me, on her cell phone. Right next to the coffee section. She hadn't heard me.

_You can't eavesdrop on her conversation. That's unethical._

_Shut up! You're missing it!_

I felt like I was in a cartoon with a shoulder-Angel/-Demon scene.

"…I know what I told you, Rosalie, so please don't spout it back to me like I'm six…" She sighed, and looked up at the bags of coffee. "…I'm sorry… Look, I'm at the store. Can we talk about this later?… Why do you need soymilk? You're not lactose intolerant…" She straightened her posture and started to push her cart to the next aisle. "…Right, because you're such a health nut…"

I decided I should probably cut my shopping trip short. I finally felt comfortable saying that it wasn't because I just wanted to avoid her, I simply wanted to avoid revealing any incriminating evidence that would tell her I was listening in on her phone call.

I was also a little worried that Bella had stopped at the coffee section. I hadn't seen her put any in her cart, but coffee at home meant she wouldn't come into the store. Was she avoiding me?

_Yes. She was _thinking _about buying coffee, and therefore she is avoiding you. COME ON!_

I stopped myself from going down that road, because it would inevitably lead to me freaking out for no reason. I didn't have enough information about anything to come up with any plausible scenario, without making up stuff.

I walked quickly to an open checkout counter with whatever I had already, and went home.

vvv

Wednesday morning couldn't come quickly enough. When Alice finally came in, I told her what was bothering me.

"I don't know what to think anymore, Alice. I'm not good at this. I have absolutely no experience, and I don't know if I can do it." I was whining. I hated whining.

_You're making your inner monologue hurt._

_Is that even possible?_

_Apparently so, 'cause you're doing a hell of a job._

"It's not a big deal. Maybe she was just PMSing. One thing you'll have to learn, is that a girl's entitled to be a crazy lunatic every so often. You have no idea the shit we have to put up with from you guys." She looked up, daring me to question her omniscience. "Plus, you said that she was talking with her friend about something that she was, again, upset about. You don't know what's going on in her life, yet, Edward. There's no reason to flip out… or be narcissistic enough to think it was about you." The last comment she made was meant to be a joke, emphasized by the smirk she wore, but it stung. Because I knew that already.

_Ow._

"Oh, you know I didn't mean it like that, I was just kidding! Come on, she—" Alice stopped when she saw the door open. "Oh, hi, Bella!"

"Hello, Alice… Hello, Edward." She looked me directly in the eye, and my legs almost turned to Jell-O.

"H-hi, Bella." We stared long enough for me to see her cheeks turn a bright rosy color, and then she looked away, opening up her bag and spouting off her regular order.

"You're coming to Study Group tonight, right?" She looked back up at me with some doubt.

Hah. As if you would say "no". That's almost as funny as thinking you forgot on Monday.

"Of course." _Stop staring stop staring stop staring stop staring…_

"Edward, could you ring her up for me? I don't have a drawer yet." Alice said, breaking me out of the trance into which Bella had unwittingly placed me.

"Sure, Alice."

By the time I finished the transaction, Alice was finished with Bella's drink and handed it to her.

"Hey, Edward, you can go. Angela will be finished in the back in just a few minutes, and I can handle it until then."

I was thankful to Alice for her deliberate attempt to create an opportunity for me to walk Bella out to her car again, but I still hadn't actually passed the part of asking if I could. But before I could panic, Bella spoke.

"It's ok, Edward, take your time. I'll wait."

Thankfully my body moved faster than my brain, and I made a bee line for my locker. I almost forgot about my apron, but right before I walked out I quickly took it off and placed it on the hook.

In the front, Alice was rummaging through the cupboards. It made her look busy, but I knew better. She was simply trying to give us the little amount of privacy she could without embarrassing me.

_She's a saint. Remember to do something nice for her later._

Walking Bella to her car wasn't hardly as nerve-wracking as the first time, although I stood there like a gaping idiot—again—when we finally got to her truck. And she snapped me out of my daydream—again—and said that she had to be getting to school.

I went to the study group that night, not knowing what to expect. Bella had been completely normal when she came in that morning, so maybe whatever happened on Monday really didn't have anything to do with me, after all. It gave me a little bit of hope.

_I guess when you start out on the bottom, the only direction you can go is up._

_Or, you know, you could just stay where you are… just don't think about that part._

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**I was seriously considering just cutting the chapter off without the last section, but I was thinking, _You know, Kelly, they don't deserve that. Too much ridiculous angst for nothing. Just add the next section. You know you want to._ So MY inner monologue was your friend today. And chapter 11 is in the hands of my betas, and chapter 12 is in progress. So no worries, I'm working really hard!**

**Anyone interested in checking out holiday drinks, here's the email I got today from my Allrecipes[.]com subscription.**

**http[://]bit[.]ly[/]6NtWn4**

**Yay, time to review! *happy dance***


	11. Chapter 11

**You guys are funny. A few of you have mentioned me keeping this all angsty. You do realize it's not even been a month, and you've got eleven chapters out of me already, right? And they're not that long. Just keep that in mind. You all read New Moon, you can totally handle the little bit of anxiety that I dish-out for a self-conscious social recluse who basically plays video games up until recently. Believe me, if you want angst, I can give you angst. It would probably come in the form of a terminal illness.**

**Just remember what I said in the beginning—I'm an HEA gal. Everyone is happy in the end. So just enjoy the ride. And really, if you can't handle it, then chill the hell out for a while, and wait until my comments read "omgomgomg he did what?" There's the solution for that. lol.**

**For all 3 of my betas… they all have wonderful ideas. In fact, one of my betas (Cora) is a writer, too! I beta'd for her first, so she's returning the favor. Check out her story, Seeing Red. It's pretty awesome. www[.]fanfiction[.]net[/]~wolvesrmyhomeboys

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**

That night, I met the rest of the study group, since I was actually on time. Jane and Alec were twins, and pretty much kept to themselves. I guessed they came because it was a quiet setting away from the norm.

I also met Rosalie, Bella's friend-and-now-roommate, and Emmett, Rosalie's boyfriend, the guy I had also seen walking with Bella down the street before. That was certainly an interesting introduction.

vvv

_I knocked on Tyler's apartment door, but instead of Tyler answering, it was Dimples. My mouth just hung open, and I was sure I looked like a fish._

_"You must be Edward. It's so good to meet you, Man." He pulled me in and gave me a bear hug. He hugged me. Definitely wasn't expecting that one. Bella ran up and came to my rescue._

_"Oh, hey, Edward! The bear who is trying to strangle you…" She said as she slapped at the guy's arm, "…is Emmett. He is…" She ran back over to grab the blonde bombshell and yanked her to the door. "…Rosalie's boyfriend. Rosalie is my roommate, and best friend." She concluded, matter-of-factly._

_"It's… _nice _to meet you, Edward." Rosalie gave me a look somewhere between acceptance and intimidation. It definitely worked. She didn't look like she could do much damage until I got up close and noticed that she was very well-toned, and could probably kick my ass if she so pleased._

_"Likewise." I replied to both of them. Bella just beamed at me, and then ushered me to the living room and let me decide where I wanted to sit… as if I would sit anywhere else other than directly next to her._

vvv_  
_

Tanya would address me, but not very often, especially when Rosalie was around. The only reason I noticed this little fact was that whenever Rosalie would go into the kitchen, Tanya would say something. Not necessarily directed at me, but I caught the pattern about the fourth or fifth time it happened. That made me curious, but I didn't worry about it too much. For some reason Bella was irked by Tanya, but couldn't figure out exactly why. If she wanted to tell me, I would listen. I had no interest in Tanya, and we weren't what you'd call friends, so I would respectfully answer her questions, but nothing beyond that.

The next Monday I came to the study group, and Tyler informed us that we were welcome all week after six in the evening, and even to stay overnight, if we needed to. As long as we sent him a text or called ahead of time, he would make sure he'd have food for us, and all we had to do was bring a few bucks to compensate. I was really grateful for that. I had the entire week to study for one class, which was Advanced Statistics—because I had a simple practical for my Bio Lab, and an _obviously _difficult exam for Intro to Bio so I didn't even feel like I should bother with it—and I had every intention of blowing it out of the water.

vvv

The practical I had to take for my lab on Monday went off without a hitch. Tuesday night I left the group at a regular time, since my Bio exam was at ten the next morning—I like to be well-rested when I torture myself—but Wednesday I planned on pulling an all-nighter.

I had my laptop with my statistics program, and all of the notes I needed to last me a good 9 or 10 hours. It hadn't escaped my attention that Bella's two major exams were the next day, and she'd probably be staying, too. The butterflies in my stomach were doing drunken jumping jacks… at least that's what it felt like.

When I finally arrived at Tyler's, it was around 6:45, since I had to run some errands for the store.

_You work too much._

Those in attendance were Tyler (obviously), Bella, Emmett and Rosalie. Rosalie was the only one who didn't look like she wanted to rip her hair out. She said she would be staying the night, mainly for Emmett, who looked like he hadn't slept in a week.

We had all been pretty quiet, studying until the wee hours of the morning. I think it was around 4 a.m. that I finally lost consciousness.

vvv

Bella looked up at me from under her lashes. She had been throwing me glances for a couple of hours. I couldn't concentrate anymore, so I stopped trying, and just stared at her. I watched her closely, like I had wanted to since I had first seen her. I wanted to touch her face.

I leaned in and grazed her cheek with the back of my hand, and she leaned into it, closing her eyes. Her mouth parted slightly, and I smelled her breath, sweet with Bella and mint. I wanted to kiss her.

I started to move my body toward her, but she stopped me lightly with the tips of her fingers. She looked around the room. I guessed that everyone was gone. Tyler was probably in his room, and Rosalie and Emmett must have left. She smiled at me, but with a hint of lust. Slowly, she moved toward me, and nudged my shoulder to move me on to my back. It's a good thing, because my left arm couldn't hold up my head any longer.

She took my face in her hands, and leaned down to place a soft, slow kiss on my waiting lips. She tasted even better than she smelled. I hadn't known that was even possible. The kiss became more urgent, and all too soon she broke away, allowing us both to breathe. Her eyes were wild, and I could imagine mine were the same. She leaned down and started to attack my neck with her mouth. I sucked in a deep breath.

vvv

I woke up—almost hyperventilating—to a room that was dark, with the curtains pulled, and my left arm was asleep. _Brilliant_. But despite the lack of feeling in my _left _arm, my _right _arm was wrapped around something very warm… and smelled really good. My heart broke into a sprint when I glanced down and realized that I was spooning Bella, and my arm was holding tightly to her lower ribcage. Before I had a chance to panic, I noticed that no one else was awake.

_Whew. Okay. Just chill the hell out and move before she wakes up._

Moving as little as possible, I lifted my head with only the help of my neck and shoulder (since both arms were indisposed), and noticed Emmett drooling on his open textbook, and Rosalie curled up with a blanket on the recliner. I guessed that Tyler wouldn't pass up a chance to sleep in a comfy bed if it was available.

Although I enjoyed this position immensely, my arm was starting to wake up and hurt like hell, so I started to get up. Slowly pulling my arm away from Bella's warm body. I was cold when I finally stood, so I knew that Bella would be. I looked around and saw another blanket on the back of the couch. I had to make sure to step carefully over Emmett's huge form to not wake him up.

_Although he may appreciate knowing that he's drooled a lake on his notes by now._

_Leave that to someone else who's known him longer than a week._

My stomach started yelling at me. It was only 8:00 in the morning. Being awake for so many hours was doing a number on my eating habits. As I walked into the kitchen, I heard the toilet flush, and a few moments later Tyler came into the kitchen in his boxers. I am ashamed to admit I know what they look like. They were just so bright! They were white, with red chili peppers on them, and had "HOT STUFF" written around the waistband.

_Awkwaaaaard…_

He completely ignored me and headed toward the pantry, with his eyes half-closed. He was reaching for the Pop Tarts. I heard my mom chanting in my head that you need protein when it comes to test-taking days, and Tyler still seemed pretty out of it.

"Hey, how about you let me make everyone breakfast? I'm no professional chef, but it'll be better than that." I pointed at the box he had in his hand.

"Uh… sure, Man. I'm gonna go back to bed. Have at it."

Seeing the confused look on his face, my guess was that he probably couldn't remember why I was in his house, but wasn't coherent enough to actually care.

From the way his kitchen was stocked and prepped, I was sure someone probably came and did it for him. That would explain the college student in a high-class apartment with the carpeted hallways. I went to the refrigerator and found eggs and milk, and in the pantry there was nice, thick bread. He even had a spice rack next to the stove. I reached for the nutmeg, cinnamon and allspice.

_French toast it is…_

I had just about everything ready to go and was just waiting for the skillet to heat up, when Rosalie walked in and sat down at the island.

"Good morning, Edward. French toast, huh?" She didn't look like she had slept all night in a recliner. Of course, I'm sure Rosalie rarely ever had an off-day. She just came off as that type of person.

"Yup. I learned from the best. Mine isn't nearly as good as my dad's, but I'd like to think it's pretty damn close." I smiled and continued to whip the batter.

"So, do you like Bella?"

If I hadn't been standing right next to the island, the bowl would have flown from my hands, and landed with a crash on the floor. As it was, I only spilled some of the batter on the marble when it landed on the counter.

_Well, she doesn't mince words, does she?_

"Um… Well…" I didn't really know if I could skirt around the question and just not say anything.

"Spit it out, Emeril." She raised her perfectly-sculpted eyebrow, daring me to lie to her.

_What's so wrong with telling her? She just wants what's best for Bella, and isn't that what you want, too?_

I took a deep breath.

"Yes. I do. What, you couldn't tell?" _That's right, enrage the lioness. Then you die. Good job, Mr. Snarky._

"Oh, no, I could. But if you had said 'no,' it would have given me reason to chop off your dick and whip it up with those eggs for lying to me." She cocked her head to the side and gave me a sweet, toothy smile. Then, her demeanor changed slightly. "I do feel the need to inform you of something, though."

If that was all I was going to hear regarding the threat to my manhood, I'd take it.

"Just as long as… I… stay entirely intact, you can say whatever you want." I said with wide eyes, and she laughed lightly.

"Well, Bella told me about the conversation you two had the other night. And you should know that Tanya isn't exactly the sweet girl she's trying to come off as… I know that you had a class with her, and she seems different now, but I can tell you that she's not."

Well, that wasn't the topic I was expecting, but I thought I would set the record straight while I had the chance.

"I'll have you know that I have no interest in pursuing Tanya, ever. But I am grateful for the warning. And… for not telling anyone about our conversation?" I asked hopefully.

_She gave you an inch; take a mile._

"It's alright. You can trust me. And I'll get the syrup heated up." She gave me a wink, and headed toward the pantry, but stopped. "I'd like to add one more thing, if you don't mind." I just shook my head. "Don't sell yourself short."

I didn't say anything. I was beginning to learn that was okay; that a response wasn't always necessary. I didn't know exactly what she was referring to, but I wasn't about to ask her to elaborate.

We stayed quiet for a few minutes. Rosalie heated the syrup, took the butter out of the refrigerator, and the powdered sugar out of the pantry. By the time I had made the first four pieces, no one else was up yet, and Tyler was still locked in his room, so the two of us just ate in silence.

I looked around the kitchen another time, and I noticed the black espresso machine sitting at the edge of the counter, out of the way. It looked like it had never been used before.

_Well, there's no time like the present._

I looked around the pantry, and random cupboards I hadn't explored yet, but finally found the coffee in the freezer. I ground enough for everyone to have two shots.

"What'll it be, Rosalie? Looks like Tyler has a bunch of syrup up here in the cupboard, too."

"Ooh, I wasn't expecting fresh coffee, too. Let's see… A Cortado, please." She said with a smirk, testing my knowledge.

"Oh, so you've been to Spain?" I shot back immediately.

"No, Portugal. I fell in love with it: well, the drink and the country. The milk is just so much better over there—in Europe in general, anyway—which made a huge difference, but I'm sure you'll do a fantastic job with what you've got. Have you been?"

"To Portugal? No. I haven't been to too many places. I've been to… England, that's where my dad's parents were from; Bordeaux, France, that's where my mom's sister moved when she got married; and I've been to Mexico, when my parents and I went on a cruise a few years ago. They were all whirlwind trips: the first two, because I was visiting family, and the third because we basically had one day at each stop, and they were all tourist-y places. But I'd love to go back to Bordeaux, one day. It was beautiful."

As I was pouring the Cortado Rosalie just nodded, and Bella and Emmett trudged in. Bella had huge red marks all down her face from falling asleep on my spiral notebook. I wish I had noticed before. I would have moved her.

A thought passed through my mind then: I knew I could never get tired of seeing Bella in the morning.

"There's nothing better than waking up to the smell of coffee, huh, Bella?" Emmett said with a huge sleepy grin on his face. Bella elbowed him sharply in the gut, and got red in the face. I didn't quite understand the exchange, but it made me smile. I had been so worried about Emmett before I met him, but I could see how their relationship worked on a sibling level, like Alice and me.

"What can I make you, Emmett?" I said, as I started Bella's drink.

"Oh, that's alright. I'm not really a coffee person. Too bitter." He made a face like he had just chewed on an espresso bean.

"How about I make you something, anyway, and if you don't like it, we can just throw it out?" I offered. If bitterness was the only problem, I could definitely remedy that. I was curious if I could make a coffee drinker out of him.

"Be my guest, Eddie."

I internally cringed at that, but I didn't show it. I wasn't uptight—_Right_.—I just didn't… like nicknames.

I handed Bella her coffee, and both Rosalie and Emmett looked at her with raised eyebrows that made her cheeks turn a beautiful rose color.

"Bellie," Emmett began, "You and Eddie here didn't exchange a single word, and yet he hands you a cup of coffee without even asking you what you want? You must be pretty boring if you get the same thing every time."

I spoke without thinking.

"Bella's not boring, she just knows what she wants."

_And there goes the filter, folks!_

The raised eyebrows were now fixed on me, and Bella just looked down at her mug, her face redder than ever. Rosalie tried to cover up her laugh by coughing. I just went back to steaming more milk for Emmett's drink.

_This is one of those laugh-at-yourself moments._

What a better time to put that into practice than when it's absolutely necessary? I just smiled as I grabbed the caramel and mocha flavorings from the cupboard above the espresso machine. I put the same amount of syrup in his single mug that I would have normally put in three. I didn't think he would mind. I made a quick job of pouring the espresso shots in at the same time as the milk so that they'd mix. Plus, it made me look cooler when I could multitask. I got a large spoon from the drawer where I had found the silverware earlier, and removed any foam from the top. He didn't seem like the kind of guy who would appreciate anything foofooey, aside from the massive amounts of sugar he was about to consume.

I gingerly placed the mug down in front of him and looked him square in the eye, with a smirk on my face. Emmett eyed the mug, but then reached for it, and slowly brought it to his lips. After one sip, his eyes grew wide.

"Wow, Eddie, that's some good shit right there! I might have to come visit you with Bella, here, some time." He drank it as quickly as the steaming milk would allow and was finished before Rosalie had even taken her second sip. I was pretty sure I had created a monster.

Bella just grinned and went back to her coffee. I noticed that she hadn't said a word yet, but didn't really know what to do about that.

_Well, you could send her a post card… or you could talk to her…?_

"Did you sleep well, Bella? I'm sorry that you didn't have a pillow." I pointed at the slowly fading red marks that went from her left temple to her chin.

"What?" She asked, and I just pointed again, at her left cheek. She felt her face, and finally found the indentations. "Oh, great. I knew that probably wasn't the best place to put my head." Her eyes widened a second, and she exchanged a glance with Rosalie. Suddenly her coffee mug became very interesting. She stared at the design on it when she pulled it away from her full lips.

"Well, Eddie, are you going to make us some French toast? I'll take as many pieces as you guys don't eat." Emmett broke me out of staring again. It seemed I was depending on people to do that for me a lot. I ignored my inability to focus around Bella and chalked it up to another laugh-at-yourself moment.

_You're not leaving your skin any time soon. Might as well enjoy it!_

"Alright then. French toast, coming up!"

* * *

**So I have had two Edward dreams since I've been hooked on Twilight. Yes, only two. Pity me. But the first one I had was so pathetically short, because I woke up around 3 a.m., hyperventilating. You'd never, ever guess what he was doing. No, he wasn't pole dancing or kissing me until I had no brain cells left, he was just standing there. He was freaking standing there, and my body just started to flip out. I literally woke up, my heart was beating a million miles an hour, and my lips were chapped. You can laugh now. It's okay. I'm just sad that my imagination isn't better. Grr. So I figured Edward would share my hyper-sensitive physiological embarrassment.**

**Oh, and just so you guys are aware, I don't hate Canon Tanya (Tanya from the books). I actually quite like her character. She knows who she is, and although she comes on to Edward, it's not like she forces herself on him (too much). In any case… like most fics, Tanya is a convenient wrench in the gears, mainly because Bella flips out when she finds out about her. Doesn't mean that I think she's a bad character in the books. Got it? Good. *smile***

**Anyone want some super awesome laughs? Mitch Hedberg was a hilarious comedian before he passed away. http[://]bit[.]ly[/]e9IgW You can also find sketches of his on YouTube.**

**Oooooh… this is when you get to review and tell me how utterly awesome you think I am. (Yes, Kelli, that was for all of us cool-word lovers. You know I actually have an inside joke with that one?)**


	12. Chapter 12

***Sings to betas* Have I told you lately that I love you? Have I told you there's no one else above you? You fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness. Ease my troubles, that's what you do. *Puts mic back on stand, curtseys, and walks off stage***

***Walks back on stage and fidgets* Ahem… Hah… I didn't finish my a/n.**

**Just so you don't feel too bad for him in the last chapter, Edward didn't have to make everyone breakfast. He did that, because he's a nice guy, and he likes to cook and make people coffee. He gets satisfaction (and possibly a little self-worth) from people enjoying what he can do. There was nothing forced about it, it was a completely volunteered-for project.**

**Oh, and if I was in that scenario, I probably wouldn't put the syrup on my pancakes. Nope, I'd warm it up, and toss it on Edward and then go lick it off. Mmmm…**

**Ok, I'm finished fo' realz now. *runs back off stage*

* * *

**

Finals were, well, "finally" over. And for the first time ever, I was disappointed. Because I no longer had a study group that I could use as an excuse to see Bella—for more than 10 minutes—on a regular basis. She came in every morning, but then we both went home again for Christmas a week later.

The Crappy Secret Santa went quite well. I bought Esme an absolutely hideous black sweater that had faux animal-print Santa sleighs on them, with random beads and shiny things as decoration, and big, red hemming. She wore it the rest of the evening, and we were constantly laughing at her.

Carlisle gave me a big red tie that had a cartoon reindeer on it, with Christmas lights around the antlers that actually lit up when you pressed the button that also played "Rudolf, the Red-Nosed Reindeer". It would randomly go off if it hit something, and we would crack up all over again.

Esme gave Carlisle… a card. He opened it up and started to read the inside, and began laughing... _very_ hard. But as he continued, his laughing subsided and his eyes became the size of saucers. He looked across at her, his face beet red, and put away the card. I did _not _look at their faces at that point, I did _not _ask what was in the card, but I _did _suggest that we have dinner.

_Now._

I tried to pretend that he didn't start laughing again, and just walked briskly into the dining room and waited for them. I _reeeeeeally _didn't want to know what was on that card.

_Christmas with the Cullens… Always an interesting experience._

Once we were settled and eating, the inquiry began.

"So Edward, how is everything going with Bella?" Leave it to Esme to cut to the chase.

"Well, I went to her study group the last week of classes and finals. Thursday we pulled an all-nighter and I made Dad's French toast for everyone, and the guy had an espresso machine." I had hoped she would leave it at that, but it was in vain.

"Well, that's nice, Sweetie… but um… it's been a week since you've been out of school. Have you asked her out yet?" _Again with "the look." _I didn't know my mom could be as pushy as Alice when it came to me dating. I was starting to recognize a pattern.

_Yeah. You're chicken shit. That's the pattern._

"I've kind of been working on that part." I partially lied. I'd at least been thinking about it.

"Alright, well let me know when you work that out." She saw right through me, but wasn't going to grill me anymore.

vvv

The next morning I helped Carlisle with eggs Benedict. Since I was the sous chef in this scenario, I just had to keep whipping the Hollandaise sauce until he was ready for it. I was really thankful that both his and Esme's cooking skills were passed on to me. It just made life easier when you didn't have to depend on someone else to prepare meals for you.

After lunch, the two of them had planned on going after-Christmas shopping. That usually consisted of getting all the things they needed that they didn't qualify as good enough to be given as a gift that year, like a toaster oven.

"Carlisle, I'm ready!" Esme flitted through the living room where we were sitting, and then sprinted back upstairs for… something else, apparently.

"Well, your mother's ready… so I probably have time for a cup of tea." He said, completely deadpan, and walked into the kitchen. I couldn't help the rolling laughter that came out of me. My parents were perfect for each other. Lo and behold, he came out about 4 minutes later with a mug in his hand, and he sat back down in the recliner.

I was still doubled over and in tears by the time Esme came back down and asked what was so funny. I waived her off, because her ignorance of the subject just set me off again.

"Ready to go, Sweet Cheeks?" Carlisle said, innocently. He put his empty mug on a coaster on the coffee table, and I gathered myself enough to say "goodbye".

"We'll see you soon, okay?" Esme said, her eyes misting. "Call me on my cell phone when you get back."

"Sure, Mom. Love you, guys, I'll see you later."

I wanted to stay longer, but I had work in the morning. Once they were gone, I cleaned up a little. I chuckled again when I went to grab Carlisle's mug. After everything was pretty much in order, I packed my bag and headed back to my apartment.

vvv

"Edward, you just need to do it. Grow a pair, already!" Alice chided, as she was reorganizing the reach-in refrigerator.

"Be quiet, Alice, please? You're starting to sound like my mother." I snapped back.

"Well, your mother sounds like a smart woman. I think I want to meet her so we can compare notes." She said with an undercurrent of sarcasm.

"That's funny. She said almost the same thing." I smirked at the memory, despite my frustration.

I had been trying to psyche myself up all morning to ask Bella to go with me to Alice's New Year's party, but her mild insults weren't doing much good. My breathing was just becoming labored and I was starting to get lightheaded. This wasn't like going to the study group. This was basically asking Bella to spend the entire night with me, on New Year's Eve, as my date. I say "basically" because I didn't know whether Bella would take it as her just being invited to the party, or if _I _was inviting her to the party. I wasn't about to make that distinction, either, until it was absolutely necessary.

Plus, what would happen if she went as my date? What would I do? I had literally no experience in this. Would we dance? Would I hold her hand? Would I—_gulp—kiss_ her? Would she _let_ me do all of these things, even if I had the cojones to do it?

I was too shy in elementary school to ever talk to a girl I thought was pretty, even after I forgot that they had cooties. Junior high was more of the same, but it was because I still went to school with the girls that I wouldn't talk to before, and now _they _wouldn't talk to _me_. I never dated in high school. I was already labeled through my entire career as a grade school student that I was a loser, and I hung out with the losers. Even if anyone had been interested in me, I would have been too hard on myself to notice. I already explained my situation in college, and here I am, twenty-two, and I'd never even held a girl's hand. In fact, I'm pretty sure the other night, putting my hand on Bella's shoulder, was the first time I had ever intentionally touched a girl I wasn't related to.

_And you wonder why you're so sexually frustrated._

And then, suddenly, I didn't have time to think about it anymore, because Bella was right there, walking in the door.

_Aren't you glad that any time you're about to make an ass out of yourself, Bella's the only patron in the room?_

I was. _Very _glad.

"I, um… have _stuff_… to do. In… the back. Yes." Alice gave me the Glance of Death that said, "You will surely die if you do not ask Bella to my party," grinned widely at Bella, and then headed to the back room.

I turned around to face Bella, and she was just giggling at Alice's antics, probably not having any clue why she was acting that way.

"Um… Large hazelnut… um… your usual?" I was still trying to recover from my hyperventilation episode, and I just couldn't think of the words to say.

How many times have you said her drink, Man? A thousand? Alice is right. Grow a pair and ask the woman on a date.

"Of course!" She just smiled at me.

"Bella-do-you-want-to-go-to-Alice's-New-Year's-party?" I blurted out as fast as I could before I gave myself the opportunity to chicken out.

Her smile faded, and she actually looked… sad.

"Oh. Well… I'd like to, Edward, but… I'm going to my mom's for New Year's in Jacksonville."

I let out the breath I'd taken in anticipation, and consequently my heart dropped to my feet.

_Guess you… didn't have anything to worry about._

vvv_  
_

Alice's party was actually fun, despite the lack of desired company. She had completely decked out her apartment, which was small, but efficient. It looked like a tinsel factory had blown up. Alice, herself, was wearing a silver dress that I don't think anyone else would have been able to pull off. It was just so… shiny. She had silver ballet flats that matched, which made her look like a brunette Tinkerbell. I'd bet money that wasn't the first time anyone had thought that.

She had come over earlier and insisted I wear a tuxedo. She bought me a silver vest and tie set and said that they were a late Christmas present, so I just needed to suck it up and accept them.

_What was that phrase you heard last semester?_

_"What you cannot avoid, welcome." Chinese proverb._

_Right. The Chinese must have met Alice._

It was a pretty intimate party. It included Alice and Jasper, Angela and Ben, and about 6 more of their friends whose names I couldn't remember, for the life of me. The evening was spent drinking eggnog shakes—recipe, compliments of Esme—and watching Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve.

At 9 p.m., I wondered what Bella was doing in Florida. I wondered if someone had caught her eye and pulled her in for a sensuous kiss. Despite my timidity, I had wanted it so badly to be me. I stopped drinking, knowing that I'd probably want to leave once the ball dropped here. I certainly wasn't going to impose on Alice by crashing on her couch.

After midnight hit I made quick rounds of saying "goodbye" to everyone and exchanging "it was nice to meet you" with those I had just met.

On the drive back to my apartment, I decided I was sick and tired of my pansy-ass not making any decisions. I may have not been ready yet to ask Bella out alone, but I sure as hell could ask her to join us at the jazz club that Alice insisted we attend this Friday. If Bella came in, I would pluck up the courage and just do it.

I laid in bed for about an hour. I just couldn't stop thinking about her. I thought back to the dream I had, and I could almost feel her lips on mine. Finally, my body started to relax, and Bella starred in my dreams again that night.

* * *

**Alas, this is where the chapter must end. Again, I'm working tirelessly to get these chapters out as quickly as possible for you guys. You're lucky I basically have no life right now. lol.**

**BTW… What Carlisle said about Esme getting ready? My dad, verbatim. Yup. He's pretty hilarious when he wants to be. I just had to put it in here.**

**I think I pretty much want every single gadget from ThinkGeek[.]com. There is no possible way that it can get any better than a Coffee Cup Power Inverter for your car (bit[.]ly[/]2JHAF) or BuckyBalls (bit[.]ly[/]2CgvOx). Plus, I can figure out binary, and they have a freaking LED binary wristwatch! Oh, and I want the shirt that says, "There are 10 types of people in this world: Those who know binary, and those who don't". Hahahaha. If you don't get it, then ask someone who does.**

**Okay, so ready to comment and tell me what you think? Ready… steady… 123GO!**


	13. Chapter 13

**So this is an extra long chapter. There was just no way of splitting it up, but I'm sure you don't mind that, right?**

**Just in case you guys don't know, I respond to almost every comment I get. So if you've made a comment that's more than just "update soon" (which are totally welcome, there's just not much I can say in response… unless you want an "okay!" *thumbs up*), and you haven't checked your inbox, it's probably there. I even give little things away sometimes, so you never know what I'll be willing to reveal within the confines of a PM… dun dun dunnnnn!**

**Betas rock. Y'all should totally get one. Or three.

* * *

**

Bella finally came in Friday of the next week.

"So, Alice, how was your party?" She asked quietly.

"Well, it was fine, until Edward here picked up and left about 25 seconds after the ball dropped." Alice smacked my arm, and I recoiled dramatically.

"Oh." Her eyes brightened, and the drunken butterflies in my stomach started smacking into each other again. "Well, it sounds about like my night. My mom had a party, and once midnight hit, I downed my glass of champagne and just went up to go to sleep. The problem was, she and her friends stayed up until about 4 a.m., which means they kept me up. Renée and champagne generally don't mix well." She finished with a smirk and a nod.

_She didn't have a date. She didn't have a date. She didn't have a date._

_Shut up! That doesn't mean anything. She probably doesn't know anyone in Jacksonville._

_Regardless… she didn't have a date. Hah!_

It was getting much more difficult to control the hope that had sprouted in me. It gave me a lot more confidence in the leap I was about to take. Ok, so maybe it was a hop. But it was movement, and it was forward. That was the point.

_You're a girl._

"So… Bella… uh…" I ran my hand _through _my hair, since it was actually long enough to do that now. "We're all going out to the jazz club tonight… would you… like to, maybe… come with us?"

"Yes." She responded without hesitation. The drunken butterflies were moshing now. "Um… I mean… sure. I was… actually planning on going with Emmett and Rose, but I'm sure they won't mind."

"Oh, well, if you had plans already you don't have to change them." I quickly said. I didn't want her to feel like she _had _to do anything.

"No! I mean… I… trust me, they won't mind. I'm sure they're sick of me being their third wheel all the time, and…" She swallowed and looked down at her hands, as she blushed violently. "…I would love to go with you."

_*Cricket*_

_Wake up, Man…_

_*Cricket*_

_…DUDE!_

I finally snapped myself out of my shock-induced coma, and a wide grin slowly spread across my face. I couldn't help it. She had just said she would "love" to go with me. The word "love" actually came out of her mouth, with me in the same sentence, and it didn't have "not" in it!

"Okay… well, then… uh… I'll meet you in front of your gate at 8:45? Is… that okay?"

She raised her eyes to look at me, her cheeks still rosy against the rest of her porcelain face, and just nodded.

"Here, you go, Bella!" Alice handed Bella her finished coffee, grinning from ear to ear. I had completely forgotten we were on the same planet, let alone less than 4 feet away from each other.

Bella sucked in a quick breath, and her blush deepened as she shyly took the cup from Alice. I couldn't help but think that maybe Bella was just as affected as I had been.

_That would certainly be a first for you._

Bella's phone started vibrating and playing the ringtone of a song I'd never heard before. I only caught the lyrics "You don't really wanna mess with me tonight" before she looked at the Caller ID and quickly said, "Well, I guess I'll see you tonight… Edward…" and turned on her heel and speed-walked out of the door while answering her phone. I just stood there, stunned at what I had actually accomplished, still looking like a complete dufus with a shit-eating grin on my face.

"You know, it's not like I would have charged her today, but…" Alice paused, and then smiled at me. "…I wonder if she'll notice today that she forgot to pay."

She broke into a fit of giggles, and I just kept smiling. It slowly began to dawn on me that she had heard the entire exchange, and stayed silent the entire time. I turned to her, and couldn't help myself from giving her a huge hug, and spinning her around. I was absolutely elated.

"Thank you, Alice."

"Um… what are you thanking me for?" She laughed at my enthusiasm.

"For just… being a good friend." I tried to convey my sincerity by looking her dead in the eye.

"Well, you're welcome, Handsome. Now, let's get back to work."

vvv

Alice called Jasper, and they came back with me to my apartment after the two of us turned over the shift to Eric and Lauren. Alice had decided that she wanted to watch _Monty Python and the Holy Grail_, that she had found when she rummaged through my movie cabinet. Rather than just watching, though, we had the subtitles on from Shakespeare's _Henry IV_, Pt. 2: "Subtitles For People Who Don't Like the Film". It was thoroughly enjoyable.

"Alright, down to business." Alice clapped her hands together and jumped up from the couch once the movie was over. Jasper rolled his eyes and mumbled something like "good luck" while he reached for the DVD controller to look at the special features. Alice grabbed my hand and pulled me into my room, and went straight to my closet.

Well, this looks vaguely familiar.

"Well… Edward," she yelled from inside, her voice muffled by clothes, "this goes against about 10 rules of fashion, but it has been a month, after all, and I think I'm just going to have you wear what you did before. Your wardrobe isn't horrible, it's just limited. Why haven't I taken you shopping yet?" Her perplexed look and cocked head made me laugh.

"Because you… would like me to maintain my sanity?" This had to be a trick question.

"Edward, Edward, Edward…" She shook her head in disapproval. "I refuse to dignify that with a response. Instead, I will simply hand you your clothes, and leave you in peace." She headed into the living room to collect Jasper, and then yelled, "We'll see you tonight, Edward! Oh!" I heard her running back to my door and she poked her head in. "Good _luuuuck_! But you really don't need it." She winked at me, and then I heard my apartment door open and close.

That little reminder made the drunken moshing butterflies come back. It was about 4 p.m., and that meant I had four hours and forty-five minutes before I went to meet Bella.

I was going to go pick up Bella to go on a date.

Bella was going to go on a date with me.

It was a group date, but that wasn't the point.

_Exaaaaaactly!_

I didn't really know what to do with myself. It's not as if it took me hours and hours to get ready, so I had to find things to keep me busy. Taking a shower, cleaning the bathroom, doing my dishes… I even went to the store and got that Crock Pot.

Once I got back home from the store, it was 8:25. I put my purchase away, got dressed, and brushed my teeth twice. I even busted out the Listerine. It wasn't like I had any assumptions about the evening, but the last thing I wanted was to be put in _any _kind of situation and have bad breath. I looked at my phone.

_8:35. Damnit._

I couldn't think of a single thing to do, so I basically sat there and twiddled my thumbs.

_8:42. Close enough!_

I walked across the way to Bella's complex and waited at the gate. I didn't have to wait for long, because less than a minute later I saw her locking her front door.

I had no words. I thought she was incredible when I saw her dressed up at the club _before_. It wasn't quite cold enough for her to have her peacoat on, and it was draped over her arm. She was wearing about one-inch black heels, and a dress that clung to her body in _all _the right places. It was deep green, and was longer on the right side, that showcased her creamy left leg. Her long hair draped over her bare shoulders and collarbone.

I just stood there for a moment, completely unable to get any words to come out, but after a few seconds of staring, I finally found my voice.

"You look stunning, Bella."

"Thank you." She said as she blushed, and broke our eye contact. "You look good, too." She then had a smirk on her face, and looked back up at me. "We match." The expression slowly faded from her face as she lifted her hand and placed it in the center of my chest, and stared intently at the slight design on the dark green tie. I had no doubt she could feel my heart pounding out of my chest, but I simply stood there until she pulled her hand away and let it drop back down to her side. Without thinking, I held out my right hand to her, and she took it. My breathing hitched when she put her delicate palm in mine.

I hadn't done anything to put my foot in my mouth or look dumb yet. Then again, it had only been about 67 seconds. So rather than just stand there and tempt fate, I led Bella to my Volvo, and opened the door for her. As she sat down, the longer, right side of the dress pulled enough to reveal her knees. I hadn't realized that knees could be such a turn-on. And I was definitely turned on.

"Thank you." She responded quietly.

I nodded and tried to think of ways to stay focused as I walked around the front to get in the driver's seat. This was going to be a long night if I couldn't keep… _myself_… in check.

We were quiet for the first half of the drive.

"Do you know who's playing tonight?" I asked, simply trying to start conversation. I wouldn't know who she was talking about if she had known, anyway.

"Oh, um… I looked them up earlier today. I hadn't heard of any of them, so I don't remember their names, exactly. I guess they don't play together often, but they all have raving reviews. And apparently the singer is phenomenal."

"Well, I'm looking forward to it." I looked over to her while we were sitting at a red light.

"Yeah, me too." She glanced at me, and I could imagine her blush, but it was impossible to tell with the red of the streetlight shining on her face.

Once we pulled into the parking lot, I went to open Bella's door for her. She didn't look me in the eye, so I had the opportunity to stare a bit more. I just couldn't believe that she had agreed to come with me tonight. I walked with her around the building to the front entrance, and after they checked our IDs we walked straight to Alice and Angela's table.

"Bella, I'm so glad you could join us! Alice told us you were coming tonight." Angela's face was ecstatic. I just smirked at her. She had chosen her words very carefully.

I suddenly noticed that Bella was still standing beside me. Snapping out of my stupor, I quickly rolled away one of the tables and let her pass through the couches in front of me. I swallowed and tried to calm my breathing as I had view of her entire backside. I had noticed that her dress tied up behind her neck, but it didn't occur to me that her upper back would be bare. The tie at her neck left two sheer fabric ribbons trailing down between her shoulder blades, and ended at the small of her back, directly above her curvaceous behind. I sat down next to her on the couch and rolled the table back to its place.

I knew Alice had seen me ogling Bella. She was trying her very best to keep her laughter to herself, with the aide of her cocktail, and avoiding eye contact with me.

The musicians were about 20 minutes late getting started, but once they were underway, a waiter came to take our order.

"I'll have a Pinot noir, please." Bella said quickly. "And could I also have the Marinara and Basil over Penne, please?"

"Yes, Miss." The kid was clearly checking out Bella. I wanted to tell him to come back when his balls dropped, but he tore his eyes away when he noticed me glaring at him, so I cut him a little slack. A very little. "And for you, sir?"

"I'll also have the Marinara over Penne, and some water, thank you." I had considered having a glass of wine with Bella, but with my luck something would happen, and then I wouldn't be fit to drive anywhere. Not that one glass would do much harm, but better to be safe than sorry.

"So Bella, how did you do on your finals?" Alice started the conversation.

"Well, I had a lot of difficult ones this semester, and it felt like I just didn't have enough time to study for them all. My Intro to Music class didn't have a final, but it's the one that I know I could have totally passed, which sucked. I had two Sociology classes, which had a lot of overlapping information in them, which was nice, but still difficult. I had a paper to turn in for my Anthro class, and I'm pretty sure I bombed my Stats exam."

"Well, Edward here just finished Advanced Statistics, so if you do have to take it over again, I'm sure he'll be able to help you." Alice just smiled. Now it was my turn to blush like crazy. Of course Alice would mention something that I was good at, and Bella was not.

The waiter was actually very quick with Bella's wine and my water. I couldn't tell if it was because he was trying to gain his TIPS back from me, or he was just bored. In my head, I had already nicknamed him "Sport".

"Well, hopefully I'll pass it. I don't think I could handle another semester of Statistics. I just might die." Bella gulped down a mouthful of wine once it was in her hand.

Alice glanced behind Jasper, and noticed Rosalie and Emmett coming through the door.

"Oh, Bella, there are your friends, you should invite them to come sit with us! We have a whole empty couch."

Bella motioned to Rosalie, and she and Emmett came over to our table.

"Alice wanted to you know if you two wanted to sit with us, Rose." Bella explained.

"Um…" Rosalie exchanged glances with Emmett. "Sure, you guys don't mind?"

"Of course not! Have a seat!" Alice said, enthusiastically.

"Alright, well, let me just let the owner know they can seat people at our table." Rosalie smiled and headed toward the bar.

She quickly returned and joined Emmett on the couch closest to the fireplace.

"I always wondered about the crazy people who got stuck next to the fireplace, but this is actually pretty comfortable." Emmett shrugged out of his jacket, and helped Rosalie with her shawl.

Sport came over, and seemed a little irritated that we had yet another addition to our party. After Rosalie and Emmett ordered their food and drinks, we all settled into a generic conversation about how we all did on finals.

Emmett had a Theory of Religion class that he felt like he did pretty well on. Rosalie's final for Psych 102 was difficult, but she thought she at least passed it. Alice was working on her last required RTF class this semester that was 5 units, and it was only one of two classes she took, so she threatened her professor that if she didn't pass, she'd be sure to take it again with him, and make his life a living hell. She claimed that she did it in humor, but I didn't think she realized how seriously he probably took it. Angela was taking all filler classes, because she was late registering for that semester and all of the ones she wanted were already filled, even after wait-listing. Jasper and Ben both happened to be interning in their respective subjects.

By the time Sport came back with our food, Bella had finished her glass of Pinot, and she promptly ordered another one. I was surprised how much she could drink, so fast. She couldn't have been more than 115 pounds, and she polished it off pretty quickly.

"This looks _sooooo _good." Bella said as she started poking her penne with her fork. I saw Rosalie give her a strange look, but then went back to the conversation.

Again, Sport was pretty quick at bringing Bella her wine. She took a sip immediately to wash down the bite that was currently in her mouth.

Bella finished her plate before I did. She really wasn't saying much at all. I wasn't hungry enough to finish mine—the drunken moshing butterflies hadn't relented—so when Sport came back to take our plates, I just gave him mine with the rest of the dishes.

I leaned back on the couch, because sitting up straight just made me look rigid and nervous, and frankly, got tiring. Once I relaxed a little bit, I looked over just in time to notice Bella lean against my arm. By this time, the moshing butterflies had worked off all the alcohol in their system, but then beat around even harder, since they weren't hindered by it. A shiver went down my back as she leaned her head on my shoulder and took in a deep breath. I had to make a conscious effort to not look down Bella's dress, since it was now right in my line of vision.

I tried the whole deep-breath thing. It did nothing to calm my nerves, but only proved how nervous I really was by being audibly shaky. Thankfully, I was surrounded by people who basically knew what was going on, and they just ignored me.

We just sat like that for a long while, listening to the conversation evolve in front of us. Somehow it went from finals, to the band that was amazing, as Bella had predicted, to 3D light-projection shows that Emmett saw in the Netherlands this past year. It sounded pretty interesting, and he wrote down the website that we could find it at, if we wanted to look it up.

It was around 11:00 p.m. when I looked down at Bella, and noticed her eyes getting heavy.

"Bella, are you ready to leave?" I whispered so as not to disturb the conversation. She shivered a little bit, and I realized I probably was blocking enough of the heat from the fireplace that she could actually be cold.

"Um… yes, please." She looked up at me from under her eyelashes and gave me a small smile. I was positive she had no idea what she did to me when she looked at me like that.

I stepped out from between the couches and watched as Bella tripped over her heel and landed back on couch. I couldn't tell if it was clumsiness, or if she really had consumed enough wine to make her that tipsy.

"Whoops!" She giggled quietly and I offered her my hand for balance as she avoided the small table before I replaced it.

Rosalie eyed Bella protectively, and although I knew she believed I was relatively trustworthy, I thought I would offer an olive branch and go up to her. Leaving Bella for only a moment, I moved to where Rosalie was sitting, and offered her my hand.

"It was good seeing you again, Rosalie." I didn't want to say anything that would imply that I had anything in mind other than taking Bella straight home, so I shook her hand, and moved on to the rest of them. "Emmett, Ben, Jasper…" I nodded to them. "Alice and Angela, I'll see you at work on Monday." I left it at that, and began to lead Bella to the exit.

She stumbled a couple times, so she clung to my waist, which didn't do anything to help me with keeping myself in check, nor did the view I had, if I wanted to look anywhere but directly in front of me. The position allowed me to have my hand at the small of her back to keep her a bit more balanced. Right. But after stumbling a third time outside, she stopped, and slipped her shoes off and carried them the rest of the way. She let out a yawn.

"I apologize if I was boring company, Bella. I know I didn't talk much."

"Oh, no…" Another yawn, followed by a giggle. "…You weren't boring. Now, I was boring. But from not getting any sleep last night, to those two glasses of wine, I should have known it would make me extra sleepy and tipsy." Another giggle. Those giggles just might have been the end of me if we didn't reach my car soon.

I was finally opening her passenger door, and she bent over in front of me to move her jacket that she had left on her seat.

_Not… helping… groan._

Once she slid in, I closed her door and went around to mine. Before I opened my side I took a few seconds to calm myself.

I got in and immediately noticed that the entire car smelled like Bella. I was pretty sure her jacket had somehow spontaneously animated itself while we were in the club and jumped all over the cabin, making sure that every surface had her scent on it. I swallowed, and started the car. I realized I wasn't making conversation, but it was taking all of my higher brain function to not basically attack the woman right here in the parking lot.

The whole ride back was silent. I was sensing another pattern here. But by the time I parked across from our apartments, I saw the reason: she had actually nodded off. I really started to regress at that point. I couldn't imagine, no matter how affected Bella might have been from her wine, that she could fall asleep and that not have any reflection on me, as her date. I didn't blame her at all if she never came back in to the store.

I figured I'd probably never get the opportunity to see her like this again, so I just watched her for a few minutes. I could always lie and say we had just parked, if she woke up.

_You should probably add "Voyeur" to your list of accomplishments, now._

I wanted so badly to tell her everything. To tell her how long I had wanted her, and how deeply she affected me. More than that, I wanted her to feel the same thing, but that wasn't something I could control. At that point, if she had told me she wanted me in any capacity, I would have taken it. It was no longer a matter of "want", it was a matter of "need". I let myself get too deep without giving myself consent to do so, but that meant I was also beyond caring. I had never had so many conflicting emotions in me at once. I was nervous as hell because I hoped so much that she could even care a fraction about me as I felt about her, but I was calm because I had finally given in, completely. I was angry with myself for being so shy about confronting her, but I was glad that I had at least protected my heart enough if she decided she never wanted to see me again after tonight. I do know that if I ever told her how much I felt for her, though, that she could obliterate me with one word, or make me feel like I could do anything, if she returned the sentiment.

I decided it was time to wake her up. I brushed her soft shoulder, ever so lightly, with the back of my hand, then leaned over to whispered in her ear.

"Bella. Bella, it's time to get up."

"Mmmm…" She moaned, and leaned into my palm. "No… Let's just… stay right here." She sighed.

I was completely gone. I couldn't have helped it if I had wanted to, but turned my hand to cup her cheek. I wanted so badly to kiss her, but there were a number of things wrong with that scenario.

_They do it in movies._

_You're not in a fucking movie, Dumbass._

_So?_

_She's asleep, AND she's buzzed. You could never justify yourself._

_Maybe she'll kiss you back._

_This is NOT making it easier, SHUT-UP._

I didn't know how much more I could take. Her breathing evened out, and I pulled my hand away from her face to lean back against my door. I didn't know if I could take anymore if I tried that again. I tried my best to calm myself down.

_Dead bunnies…_

_…the video Red Asphalt…_

_…Esme and Carlisle…_

_And we have a winner! But be sure to come up with a better one later. Something less traumatizing, perhaps?_

Just a few seconds later, she sucked in a deep breath, and her eyes opened, and she turned to me.

"Oh my gosh…" Another giggle. "…I'm so sorry, Edward. I should have known better about that wine. I'm such horrible company."

I wanted to confess to her right then, while she was berating herself, but I held back. I just smiled, got out of the car, and went around to open her door. Her shoes were still off, and you never know if there are things like broken glass in the middle of the street.

"Um… Maybe you should put your shoes back on, Bella." I said, quietly.

"Oh. Yeah, that'd probably be a good idea, huh?" Another giggle. If I lasted through the next few minutes, I would be home free, and not have to constantly imagine my parents together to stay in check. I was really going to have to work on that one.

She was concentrating very hard on getting one of the buckles undone, but then dropped it on the ground. I kneeled on the ground to pick it up, and I loosened the buckle, put it on her right foot, and re-fastened it. I reached around in front of the seat and did the same with her left shoe. I looked up at her, and she was just staring at me, wide-eyed. I stood up, and held out my hand to help her out of the car.

She took my hand and stood, not breaking eye contact with me. I knew if I stayed there too long, my resolve would break. I turned and placed my left hand on the small of her back, when she sighed, and leaned into me, placing one arm around my back, and the other on my chest. The moshing butterflies were back with machetes, and were trying to kill me.

Once we were standing in front of her gate, she turned to stand in front of me. Before I could move, she got up on her tip toes, and pressed her lips to mine.

**Ooooooh… ouch! Kelly's gonna get shanked. Yeah, sorry. Had to happen. But please don't flip! I only first published this on November 28, and we've come so far already! I made sure I knew basically what was going to happen BEFORE I posted the first chapter, so that I COULD get the following chapters out in a timely manner. So… yay? *nods head vigorously***

**I've been thinking of the best way to let you know how this is going to work, so I figure instead of just saying "Okay, this is the last chapter! We're finished" I'd let you know NOW, that there are only a few more chapters left. Yes… sad day. The point of this fic is for them to get together… but just so that you don't flip out on me—you're probably already saying, "Uh… too late, Stupid!"—I'm going to be writing the Bella POV to this fic, and then a sequel. Bella's gonna have a lot of things to say about her behavior that really sucked in this fic, and then in the sequel we're going to meet the 'rents (which means more Carlisle and Esme goodness!) and beginning-of-relationship issues. Which basically means just lots of fluff… and maybe we'll throw a little citrus in there, but we'll see. LOL.**

**So yessss! You can tell me how much you hate me, it's okay. Hahahaha.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Please read this before you continue: **_This chapter has comments regarding racism. If you have any questions as to my personal opinions on the topic, I would greatly appreciate a PM, as opposed to a nasty comment assuming that I've said something that should offend you. I take the subject of racism VERY seriously, and I absolutely do not intend to offend anyone, so I'd be grateful it if you took my word on that. On that note, if you have any questions at all, I would be more than willing to discuss the subject with you in private. This is a very truncated dialogue, and I am not limiting my knowledge to one book and no experience._

**On that happy note, on to the chapter! Yaaay!**

My lips automatically moved with hers, and she pressed harder against me. She was so sweet. She tasted like Bella marinara. It was more mind-blowing than any dream I had ever had of her.

But then I froze. I tasted the wine on her lips, and although it tasted… well, amazing… I remembered why this wasn't a good idea. She wasn't quite drunk, but "really tipsy" is definitely not the memory I wanted to have for our first kiss. She noticed when my body locked up, and her eyes widened. She slowly backed away, breathing heavily, and her face turned redder than I had ever seen it. So much so, that the blush even spread down to her neck. Quickly, without saying anything, she reached into her bag, and found her keys. The gate shut behind her and she walked briskly, tripping once on her shoes, to her apartment. I was stuck, and I still couldn't find my voice to respond.

I have spent the large majority of my life being confused by women, but nothing compared to the feelings I had right then. I was… shocked, ecstatic, relieved, horny, wired, exhausted, and I was completely perplexed. I didn't know what had caused her to just walk back into her apartment without saying anything, but that wasn't the most prominent thing that was on my mind. My entire body was a live wire, and I just couldn't get past the fact that she had kissed me, with no warning.

I had been standing in the same spot for about a minute, with the same dumbfounded expression on my face. I absently considered that any people potentially watching the scene would be quite entertained by the whole thing. But I didn't really care.

I began walking toward my apartment, trying to keep my actions under control. To be perfectly honest, I felt like I could run a marathon. She kissed me. _She _kissed _me_.

Unlocking my apartment door, I immediately knew I couldn't go to sleep. My entire body was wide awake, and at attention. I decided to go for a run.

I quickly changed my clothes, grabbed my mp3 player, and started jogging my normal route. But no matter how loud the music was, or how fast I ran, I couldn't get Bella out of my head. There was a stretch of about a half mile where I had completely tuned out my music. Curious as to what I had missed, I flipped back through, and saw that it was "Hyperventilation" by Apocalyptica and "Pressure" by Staind. Not the hardest things in my collection, but you get the point.

I got back to my apartment around midnight, and although my body was a little more tired, my brain was still very active. I jumped in the shower to wash off the sweat from my run, and take care of the… problem… that I hadn't been able to reduce, even fractionally.

_What are you, sixteen?_

I did know _something_. I _felt _like I was sixteen, and I _felt _like a girl who needed to call her friends to let them know what happened. And because of that, I texted Alice: **Call me.**

I figured if she was asleep already, then she'd just call me in the morning. But if she was still awake, which I assumed, she—

My phone rang not even 20 seconds after I had sent the text.

"Oh my gosh, Edward, what happened? Spill!" She hadn't even waited for me to say anything.

"Well, 'Hello' to you, too, Alice."

"Don't you 'hello' me, Edward. Start talking."

I recounted our lack of conversation on the way back, and everything else that happened, but without my internal commentary or physical issues. She was absolutely giddy when I mentioned the part about putting on Bella's shoes.

"Oh… my… GOSH! You really did that, didn't you?"

"What are you flipping out about, Alice? I didn't want her to walk across the street in bare feet."

"Edward, that has got to be the single most romantic-slash-sexy gesture that I have ever heard with my own ears! Whatever. Please continue."

When I told her that Bella had kissed me out of nowhere, I could almost hear her eyes falling out of their sockets, when she gasped. But then I started getting into what happened after that, and something occurred to me. Bella didn't look… happy. And when I recalled more, she looked… what I could only describe as… "scared". I started to panic. I had been so consumed with the fact that she just planted one on me, I didn't even think to look past at what was happening. Did she regret it? Was she more drunk than I had thought? Was I that bad?

"…going on? Edward? Hello? Did I lose you?" Alice was trying to get my attention, for I didn't know how long.

"I'm sorry, Alice, I'm just freaking out a little bit." I quickly told her what I had been thinking about, and she just started giggling.

"Edward! Edward, stop, please. Stop. It's okay." She tried to calm me down, but she was still laughing at me, and it was starting to get on my nerves. "Edward, let me see if I have this. You put her shoes on for her. Walk her to her gate. She kisses you, and you freeze up and say nothing. Is that right?"

_Well, it sounds stupid when you put it like that._

_That's because you are stupid, Stupid!_

"Yeah, that pretty much covers it." I took my glasses off and pressed down on the bridge of my nose.

"Edward, she thinks you rejected her. She's thinking that she completely misread you, and you didn't say anything to refute that. Hon, she's embarrassed!"

I was silent for a few seconds, trying to comprehend how in the world Bella could think I didn't like her. Or that I didn't _want _to kiss her! And, oh, how I wanted to kiss her. Well, I wanted to do more than that, but first things first.

"Or," I retorted, "she just thinks that she made a stupid move and is still in the bathroom, rinsing with mouthwash, and scrubbing down with lye."

"She doesn't think that."

I took a deep breath. I wanted to believe her. But the realistic side of me said what I had been arguing the whole time: Bella knows she made a mistake, and I'd never get another opportunity to be with her.

"Edward, how about you just call her? I can guarantee you she won't mind."

"Um…" I didn't know how to tell Alice that we had yet to exchange numbers.

"Oh, for the love of Pete, Edward, you haven't asked for her number yet, have you? Hold on… Okay, you have a pen? You can tell her I gave it to you." She spouted off the number. "Now… you text me as soon as you call her. Do it now. If you don't, I'm going to call you every fifteen minutes until you do, and I don't care if it's three in the morning. I'm hanging up."

_Well, okay then._

I took a few more deep breaths and thought of what I could say. If she answered the phone, I didn't know if I could do it. But since Alice had threatened to harass me until I did, I just stopped thinking about it and dialed, and it rang three times.

**Hello, this is Bella's voi—**

I quickly hung up. If it went to voicemail, that meant she was probably asleep, and I'd have to leave a message. I'd have to call back, and I just prayed that I didn't wake her up. I thought briefly about what I was going to say, and then dialed again, and it rang.

**Hello, this is Bella's voicemail. I can't answer my phone at the moment, so please leave a message, and your phone number if I don't already have it. Thanks! _Please leave a message after the tone._ *beep***

"Uh, Hello, Bella. It's Edward. I um… I got your number from Alice, so I hope that's okay. If you could give me a call back when you have time, that would be great, but um… I understand if you're busy getting ready for school on Monday. So… if you don't have time, I guess I'll just… see you Monday night at Study Group. I was just calling to make sure you were okay, and I didn't get to say 'goodnight', so… Goodnight… Bella."

I flipped my phone shut, caught my breath, and then opened it again to text Alice.

**I did it. Happy?**

Ten seconds later…

**A: Ecstatic. I knew you had it in you. What'd you say?**

**E: Just to either call me back, or I'd see her on Monday if she didn't have time. And that I didn't get a chance to say 'gnite'.**

**A: Wow. And I didn't even tell you what to say. Impressive, Handsome. ;)**

**E: Sure. I still think she's probably already used a whole bottle of Listerine.**

**A: Only to be ready for you for next time! Haha. ;-***

**E: How does it feel to be so annoying?**

**A: Absolutely wonderful. Now go to bed. Don't you have to open?**

**E: Nope. I get weekends off now. It's a beautiful thing. :D**

**A: Good. Eric needs to get his rear in gear.**

**E: Pretty much. He's such a prick.**

**A: Hah! Right on. Well, I'll see you on Monday. Keep me posted if anything happens.**

**E: Will do. Night, Alice.**

**A: Later.**

vvv**  
**

Well… I had given Bella the option to either call me back or I'd just see her on Monday… and she took the latter. I was glued to my phone all weekend, and I didn't even get a text. But I figured I had done that to myself. If Alice was right, and Bella was embarrassed, then she would probably be nervous about calling me back. That also made me think that she might skip the study group all together, too, but I could at least hope that she wouldn't go that far out of her way to avoid me.

By Monday, I decided to give Bella a break. I never called her back, and she didn't contact me. She didn't come in to the store, either. I was aching inside, but I figured that if she wanted to forget about the whole thing, then I'd let her, no matter how much I couldn't. I had replayed it so many times, it was burned into my brain. I would just have to go on with my life, pretending like nothing happened. I would never want her to feel uncomfortable, if I could help it. I didn't know if I _could _do it, but I would try, for her.

That evening I got to Tyler's apartment a few minutes before eight, and Bella hadn't arrived yet. I brought the book she wanted to discuss before, in case it got really awkward and I needed an ice breaker.

I knocked, and Tyler almost immediately opened the door.

"Eddie, my man! Come on in. You're a few minutes early, so no one else is here yet. I'm ordering Chinese tonight, so it should be here in about a half hour. I never thanked you for making breakfast during finals. And you can make a mean espresso. I didn't know something that good could come out of that machine. You got a gift, Man."

"Um… You're welcome, and thank you." I just smirked. I was glad Tyler didn't seem to be informed of the situation with Bella. Not that he had a reason to be, but I chalked it up to my paranoia for why I made the observation.

There was another knock at the door, and Tyler went to go let in Bella and Rosalie. My heart sank into my stomach. The resolution I had made in trying to let Bella go went entirely out the window. I didn't even know if I truly had it to begin with.

Bella looked over at me standing in the living room. She had a shy smile, but then blushed and diverted her eyes. She briefly turned to whatever conversation that Tyler and Rosalie were having, but then all three made their way to put their things down on the floor. Rosalie quirked her eyebrow at me and took a seat in the recliner.

Bella sat across from me. It wasn't next to me, but it wasn't out in the hallway, either.

_Well, that's a good sign._

"Oh, I see you brought it." Bella spoke quietly, nodding to the book _Black Like Me_ on the floor by my left leg. Reading the title again reminded me of a question I had for her.

"So… how did you know that I was taking Intro, and not an African American Studies class, or something?" I tried my hand at a relatively neutral question, and for the most part, I kept my cool.

"Oh… well, I know you said in the beginning of the semester that you had lots of Intro classes left because you hate them—"

"You remembered that?" I didn't want to interrupt, but I couldn't stop the words from coming out.

She looked confused for a moment, and then blushed again. "Yeah I… I guess I did."

Bella had remembered what I said when I was first complaining to her about my Intro to Biology class at the beginning of the Fall semester. I didn't know whether I was reading into that or not, but it hit me like a ton of bricks anyway. I pushed it to the side, and tried changing the subject.

"So you said that you thought I'd like the ending, and I really did. At first I thought he was only going to be sympathetic toward African Americans, but then he turns it around and explains that it's their responsibility, too. He's not diminishing the role that Whites have played in racism, he's simply explaining that everyone does it, and Blacks are no exception. That really changed the way I thought about the subject, a lot." As I spoke, her eyes brightened, and she nodded in agreement.

"Exactly! Times have definitely changed, but it is still a direct account of why things are so screwed up, even if it's in a different way now. The thing is, a lot of people think racism's not around anymore, but we live in California, one of the most diverse states in the country! Even so, I've seen some really messed up shit, just in the last few years to blow _that _one out of the water." She picked up my book and absently flipped through the last few pages.

"Well, you'll have to tell me about it some time." I regarded her with undiluted intensity, amazed at how passionate and caring she was about people. You would think I would have felt like I was simply repeating myself when I thought about how incredible she was, but I didn't. Bella hadn't looked up at me yet when Rosalie intentionally cleared her throat, and I glanced over to find her smirk and roll her eyes.

Bella and I chatted a little more about the book, and school in general. Alec, Jane showed up at nine, and then Tanya, about fifteen minutes later.

It seemed everyone had at least one difficult class, so we all stayed pretty quiet and focused on reading our corresponding books.

"Thank you for warning me about Engel, Bella." I whispered, attempting to not disturb the silence much.

"Oh no, did he do something horrid?" She whispered back.

"No… I was just able to read between the lines a little better than most. The way he presented the class was pretty innocuous, but from reading the syllabus I can tell that he's going to enjoy springing things on the unsuspecting saps who don't know what the hell is going on." I smirked at her, and she giggled.

"Oh, are you talking about Engel for Sociology?" Tanya interjected a bit louder.

"Yeah." Bella and I both responded at the same time, when we both looked at each other and snickered. When I turned back around to glance at Tanya, I almost missed the eyebrow she had raised in response to us before replacing the blank mask.

"That man is, by far, the biggest self-righteous jerk on campus." Tanya commented again. "I mean, it's an Intro class. There's no reason for him to make it so difficult."

Bella and I had returned to our studying when Rosalie stood up from the recliner.

"Hey, Bella, are you ready to go yet? If I go over any more of the same material, I just might gouge my eyes out."

"Um… let's see…" Bella looked down at her books, and then back up at Rosalie. "Well, I could stand to do a bit more reading. Edward, would you be able to give me a ride back to my apartment?" My eyes snapped to hers, and I held back a wide grin and simply nodded. Bella smiled. "Alright, then, Rosalie, I left my purse in your car, so I'll walk down with you."

Bella had closed the door behind them. A few minutes later, I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"So Edward… I was thinking… are you busy Wednesday night? After study group, of course." Tanya then moved closer to my side and rested her chin where her hand had been.

"Well, Tanya," I shrugged out from under her. "I usually stay pretty late, as you can see. And then I have school the next morning, so…" I just trailed off. I didn't want to play this game anymore.

"That's too bad… Well, we'll just have to work something out, then." She shifted back to her original position. _That's_ the Tanya I knew all too well, and I was thankful that I had kept my guard up, due to Rosalie's warning. No wonder Bella had been weirded-out by her behavior before.

Once Bella came back in we all settled back into a study-silence, but then all too soon it was time for Tyler to kick us out.

"Sorry, guys, I have to be outta here in nine hours." He said apologetically.

We gathered our things and Bella let out a big yawn as she followed me to my car. After driving for a while, I heard her exhale loudly.

"I think I'm gonna have to buy an espresso machine." Bella said.

"Why?" I couldn't imagine she would be telling me this if she had been trying to avoid me, so I figured I'd ask her directly.

"Because Jessica works on Tuesdays. And she never listens." She rolled her eyes, and my mind flashed back to when I had seen Bella taking off the mass of foam from the top of her coffee.

"Yeah… Jessica can be irritating, but she's good at her job. I can't imagine why she'd forget something so simple as 'no foam'."

"I think she just _really _doesn't like me." Bella smirked, which made me curious.

"Why? Did something happen?"

"Oh, um… no… nothing…" She shook her head, and her smile only increased, so I knew she was lying, but I didn't ask. She'd tell me when she felt comfortable.

I pulled into my normal parking spot across from our apartments, and walked Bella to her gate.

"Well… thank you very much for giving me a ride home, Edward…" She gave me a small smile, and then unlocked her gate. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Bella."

**The next chapter is in the works and will be out soon!**

**Questions? Concerns? Threats? Suggestions for what I should make for my office Christmas party? ;)**


	15. Chapter 15

**I hope everyone enjoyed a happy holiday! I know mine was surprisingly NOT horrible! Yay for families getting along! Hah!**

**To those of you who just started and are already caught up, welcome to the party! We have fun yelling at me for making Edward a pansy-ass whiny bitch (his words, not mine), but he's definitely coming around. Bella's been throwing him a lot of mixed signals (well, mixed to him 'cause he doesn't know what to do with himself), but he's finally coming to realize that it's okay to be himself. If you remember, he couldn't say more than 5 words to her for a while. That's totally his fault, btw. ;) I have regular customers that I've come to know pretty well, and it's all in how you present yourself.**

**Oh, and for those of you who are aware that I totally flipped out when I initially thought I did something horribly, horribly wrong for earning absolutely NO comments on chapter 13: ff[.]net is trying to kill me. First, I accidentally posted chapter 9 as chapter 13, because the files available to me are listed in numerical order (e.g. 1, 10, 11, 12, 13, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9). So rather than paying attention, I simply picked the last chapter in the list. That's for that. Then with the reviews, it simply decided to stop sending notifications for chapter updates and story reviews. So it wasn't until I posted chapter 14 and didn't get an E-mail notification that I knew what was going on. *whew* Well, I'm getting them all now! LOL.**

**For everyone who hasn't noticed, I have a new avatar that says what I think you should do when life throws you lemons. ;)

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I walked into my apartment and decided to check my school E-mail before I went to bed. Among addresses from professors and the student union notifying everyone what fun games they would be having that semester, there was a letter from the Anthropology department. The body was a list of events that qualified as acceptable subjects to report on for any given class. One bullet particularly caught my attention.

_Location: Getty Villa. Malibu, 90272_  
_Exhibit: Mummy of Herakleides. Romano-Egyptian, Egypt, about AD 150._  
_On Display: Permanent exhibit_  
_Applicable classes: ANTH 100, 105, 210, 310; AFST 280. To be used as reference only._

I wondered if Bella had ever seen it. She probably had, since it said that it was there permanently, but there was no harm in asking.

The one good thing about either Getty location is that entrance is free, so I immediately went to the website and made a reservation for two, at 2 p.m., so I could be prepared if she could go. If she couldn't—or didn't want to—then the only thing I'd be out was my pride.

vvv

Bella didn't come into the store on Wednesday. I didn't worry because I knew there were too many factors that could be the cause of that: petitioning classes, meetings with professors, working out carpooling with Rosalie or Tyler, or even just waking up too late to have any spare time.

After school, I spent the rest of the afternoon reading for classes, grocery shopping, and doing laundry. I caught myself glancing in the direction of her apartment building more than once during my laundry run. I knew full well she was at school—she had told me that Wednesday was her longest day of the week—but I still uselessly hoped to catch her walking in or out of her building.

_If you keep this up, you're going to start hallucinating. Snap out of it, Crazy!_

When I got back to my apartment I took notes on Post-Its and stuck them in my copy of Black Like Me. Despite the content of the book, I couldn't help but smile at the way it diverted a more awkward reunion between Bella and me. That occupied the rest of the time I had before heading over to Tyler's.

vvv

Tyler opened the door for me, and I sat on the floor next to Bella so that she was in between me and Tanya. I really hoped that Tanya had enough sense to back off entirely, if I used Bella as a buffer. Alec and Jane sat in their usual spots to the side of the room, and when Rosalie and Emmett finally arrived, Rosalie took her spot on the recliner, and Emmett on the floor in front of her, his papers spread out so that he could see everything at once.

I knew that some time during the evening I'd have to ask her if she wanted to go with me on Saturday, and decided to just wait for the right moment. At the very least, I could pull her aside before she left.

No one really carried on conversation. We all took a break to eat once the food was delivered, but then fell back into a comfortable silence. It was around ten-thirty when Emmett violently gathered all of his notes, stuffed them in his bag, and yanked Rosalie to stand up with him.

"Okay guys have fun Eddie you can give Bella a ride home here can't you thanks adios!" He said, all in one breath.

Bella just snickered as Emmett nearly flew out the door with Rosalie in tow. I shot her a confused look. She leaned over to whisper in my ear.

"Rosalie has been tormenting Emmett all night. I think he finally had enough." She giggled. "Sorry about that… do you mind driving me home? If not, I can ask Tyler." Her breath hit my neck and sent a shiver down my spine, and I tried to control my excitement to such an insignificant thing as taking her home.

"Of course not… Why would I mind?" I said breathily as I backed up to look at her. She simply shrugged in response and went back to her work.

A half hour later, Bella put her things away and sat back as she began to read the Post-Its inside of my book. I had been finished with my work for a while and was just trying to look busy and didn't rush her, so it looked like a good time to pack up.

"Are you ready to leave?"

"Yep."

Once we were out on the road, I remembered that I had to ask Bella about Saturday. I took a deep breath that only minutely calmed me, and decided to just get it over with.

"Bella, have you ever been to the Getty Villa?" _This will do no good if you have a heart attack and you both die now. Calm the hell down._

"Um… no, I haven't. I've been meaning to, since it reopened, though. I guess I just haven't made the time for it. What brought that up?"

"How would you like to go with me, this Saturday?" I stole a glance at her, and her eyes were wide. I felt the need to explain myself. "Um… well, see, I got an E-mail from the Anthro department, and—"

"Yes."

I sighed in relief, and grinned widely.

"Okay, then… the reservations are for 2 p.m., so we should probably leave here by eleven, just to be safe. Is that alright?"

"Yeah… that's alright."

"Okay." I said lamely. I couldn't think of anything more coherent to say. My inner monologue was doing a happy dance, because he was really ready to ream me if she had turned me down. I didn't want to psyche myself up for no reason, though, if this whole thing turned out to be a flop.

vvv

The time until Saturday was surprisingly slow. I say "surprisingly" because although each moment ticked by excruciatingly, I couldn't even begin to tell you what I did to fill those two days. I went to work and school, but none of it stuck. All I could think about was my day with Bella.

By eight on Saturday morning, I couldn't go back to sleep. I had three hours before I could go wait for Bella at her gate, so I took a run, made myself some espresso on the machine that I desperately needed to replace, and then looked up some of the exhibits that we'd be seeing that day, online.

From the limited number of photos on the front page, I could tell that the renovation was absolutely beautiful, and was annoyed that I hadn't made an effort to visit until then.

It was twelve minutes to eleven, and I couldn't wait. I walked across the street to the gate, and Bella was out and heading to meet me before I got there. I briefly mused at the fact that she and I always had similar timing. I was sure it was a coincidence. It's not as if she waited at the window to see me coming.

_Brilliant. It may not be, but now you've got the idea in your head. Good job! How about a thumbs-up?_

I wouldn't survive the day if I kept having thoughts like that the whole time. I did my best to push it to the side, and waited for Bella to lock the gate. She turned around and smiled at me. She was wearing a pair of dark jeans with a deep blue long-sleeve top that was snug but comfortable-looking, and made her look soft.

I crooked my arm for her to latch on to. "Shall we?" I tried to curb my enthusiasm, but it wasn't working very well.

"We shall." She played along by taking my right arm and walked with me to my car.

Once inside, I plugged my mp3 player into the cassette adapter, and I held it out to Bella.

"Here you go, DJ. We've got a few hours ahead of us, so have fun."

She took the device from my hands and smiled as she scrolled through its contents.

"You know what? I think I'm just gonna put it on 'shuffle'. That way we can get some entertainment value along with it." She smiled at me conspiratorially.

"That's what I do." I returned her expression and pulled away from the curb. The first selection was Chopin's Nocturne No. 19 in Ebm. My favorite piece of classical music.

"This is beautiful." She sighed and rested her head against the seat. The next selection made her laugh. "Wow. Chopin to Jimi Hendrix. This thing is definitely good at shuffling. You know, Hendrix is greatly under-appreciated by our generation."

A few more songs passed, and then one played that she wasn't familiar with.

"This is really interesting."

"It's the second of five movements on a CD by a band called Ludo." I informed her. "It's kinda funky, but do you want to hear the whole thing?"

"Sure. They sound really interesting."

I told her which playlist to go to, and then explained what it was basically about.

"Like I said, it's kinda weird and nerdy. This guy's wife has died in a car crash…" Bella turned to me with a shocked look on her face. I laughed. "…and he's created a time machine to go back and save her. Something goes wrong, and he ends up somewhere when the dinosaurs were still around, so you're going to hear him singing about pterodactyls." She snorted, but continued to listen. "The second track is set way in the future when the Apocalypse is beginning. The third track is him making his way back to his time machine, and then the fourth describes him landing in the Apocalypse that's described in the second track, and the fifth is self-explanatory. Anyway… I wish I had the lyrics on me, but if you listen really closely, they're pretty easy to understand. If you miss something, you can just pause it, or go back, or whatever. All of it is about a half hour."

We were silent, listening to the dynamic music. At the end of the fourth track she was sniffling, but halfway through the fifth, the tears were free-flowing. It was the same way I reacted when I heard it all the way through for the first time. Yes, I am man enough to admit that I cried like a little baby.

"Oh my gosh…" _Sniff_. "…that was so sad!" _Sniff_. "Where did you even find that?"

"Just browsing. I had a few other songs by them on my computer, and when I found this, I just downloaded it. I had it for a long time before I even listened to it." We were quiet for a minute. "If you want, you can put the music back on… unless you're too distraught." A smile was tugging at the right side of my mouth, and Bella playfully hit my arm before she turned the player back on "shuffle."

We pulled in a little before two and headed up to the main building. The whole way I just hovered over her, ready to either grab her hand or put my arm around her waist, but I didn't. I wanted so badly for her to _not _pull away, and I just didn't have enough confidence that she wouldn't.

The first gallery we entered consisted of paintings. Bella went to the right, and I headed to the left. I looked at the collection, but I didn't really see them. I kept glancing around to look at Bella. She would stop and analyze every piece. We slowly made our way through various rooms holding bowls, goblets, statues, coins, jewelry, and other random things.

Bella skipped one gallery and made a bee-line for the room it was adjacent to, that held the mummy exhibit. I chuckled and leaned on the door frame and watched her as she was all but pressed up against the glass case in the center of the small room. She looked over and saw me, then motioned for me to join her. She started talking about the different techniques she recognized that the Romans used, and where they tried to more closely copy the Egyptians. She backed up and stood only millimeters away from me, and I could feel the warmth of her body. I ignored my increasing heart rate and breathed in deeply, smelling her hair.

"_…blending of these two traditions was characteristic of the ethnically and culturally diverse population of the Roman province of Egypt._" Coming back to earth, I realized that she had been reading from the description below the case. Just then, a large group of school children, probably around 7th grade, came through and looked at the displays. The one boy who seemed to be the leader of this particular group was laughing.

"It's not real, that's dumb!" He said with authority regarding the contents of the glass case, and the rest of the kids laughed along with him. They kept making jokes at the smaller displays along the wall, and finally left with their clipboards and notebooks in hand.

I turned back around, and noticed that one girl hadn't left yet. She was staring, wide-eyed at the mummy, and I could tell that she didn't share the same disbelief as her classmates. I looked down to see the profile of a grinning Bella, absolutely thrilled about the awe that the girl held for the artifact that had been around for almost two millennia. A noise came from a small video installed in the wall behind me, describing the mummification process.

"Hey." I whispered to Bella, and pointed at the video. As we walked over, I turned around and motioned to the girl to get her attention. "Do you want to see how they did it?"

The girl nodded, and followed me over. Bella pressed the screen to start, and we watched the video in silence.

"Wow." The girl said, after it was finished. "But why do they use salt? Wouldn't it get sticky?"

"Well," Bella explained, "have you ever swallowed water while you were at the beach, and your throat was sore after?"

"Yeah…?"

"Well the reason for that is because salt sucks the water out of things. So the reason your throat gets scratchy and sore, is because the salt that's in ocean water sucks out little bits of the water in your throat." The girl's eyes widened, but she remained silent. "And have you ever left wet clothes somewhere, and they smell funky after a while?" The girl nodded again. "Well, that's called mildew, and it's because the water starts growing things in it. So if you leave a mummy in salt long enough, it sucks all the water out so that nasty things can't grow in the body once you wrap it up." I smirked at the comparison Bella had made. The girl's head snapped up when she heard someone calling for her and quietly said "bye" before running into the hallway.

"You would make a wonderful teacher." I smiled at Bella, and she just blushed and looked away. "No, really. Your enthusiasm rubs off. You got me excited about the mummification process."

She smirked at me, and then I walked with her down to the gallery at the end of the hallway.

Smack in the center of the room was a bronze… thing. From an indirect view it may have looked like a lion, but it also had the head of a goat, and a snake as a tail. Bella and I looked at the displays around the room first, and then stood to contemplate what this horrendous creature was.

"It says it's_ The Chimaera of Arezzo_." She said with humor in her voice. I went to stand behind her.

"And it's female." I whispered in her ear and pointed to the description below. She hit me lightly with the back of her hand. She backed up and put her mouth closer to my ear.

"Can you explain to me why the snake-tail is biting the goat's horn? Considering it's a part of the same body, isn't that a little counter-productive?" She giggled and then turned her face back to the statue.

"Your guess would probably be better than mine. But I might be a bit upset if I was on the ass of a lion, too." That provoked her giggling more, and I moved a little closer. My hand involuntarily ghosted her hip. When I got too close and brushed her upper thigh, I heard her breath catch, and I yanked it away and put it in my back pocket. "Ready?"

She nodded and we walked out to the long pool in front of the main building. I followed her to the end of the courtyard and down the steps to the balcony, and she gasped at the view. The sky was scattered with clouds but you could see clearly for miles. Visible beyond the trees and between the hillsides, we saw right where the sky hit the water in the horizon. The sun was directly behind the hills to the right, and its position made the ocean glisten and the clouds look like cotton candy.

"It's beautiful." She said, barely above a whisper. She stood there with her hands at her sides, and I moved to be beside her. My hand brushed hers, but she didn't flinch away. I prayed fervently that I wasn't incorrectly interpreting that as an open invitation, and wrapped my hand around hers.

We just stood there for a moment… or a half hour, I didn't really notice. But then Bella whispered again.

"What time is it?"

I looked at my phone and saw it was almost five. "Time for us to leave. They're closing up here soon."

"Alright." She sighed.

We started to head down to my car hand-in-hand, but then my stomach rumbled.

"Oh, I'm hungry, too. What do you want for dinner, I'm buying! I'm kind of in the mood for burgers. What do you think?" Bella rambled, but I just stopped and turned to look at her quizzically.

"Um… who made this decision?"

"Well, we don't have to have burgers, it was just an idea." She actually looked a little hurt.

"No, about who was going to pay." I chuckled, and realization dawned on her.

"Um… I did?" She raised her eyebrow at me. "You drove, I get to buy dinner."

_Like hell you are._

"Uh, no. That's not how this day works. I invited you to come with me today. I get to pay." She started to argue, but I reached up with my free hand to put my fingers to hold her lips closed and whispered, "I will win this debate. So please do yourself a favor and save your breath for something else."

I was mortified, but as soon as the last unintentionally-laced-with-innuendo sentence left my mouth, there was no going back. I just stayed still and watched the blush creep into her cheeks. When she nodded I released her lips from my fingers, and we continued walking.

"So you said burgers? How does In-N-Out sound? There's one about 10 min away from home, unless you need to eat sooner."

"No, that sounds fine." She said quietly.

I continued to hold her hand until I opened the passenger door to let her in. By the time I started the car, Bella already had the mp3 player in her hand, ready to attack the "play" button. We listened to music about half of the way back, but then she turned it down a little bit and said something that caught me off guard.

"I'm sorry I didn't call you back last week."

"Oh! Uh… That's okay… really." I felt badly that she had apparently been worrying about that. I hadn't been particularly thrilled that she'd opted to just see me in person, but I gave her the choice.

"'Kay." And then after a moment, she returned the volume to its previous level.

And that was it. It occurred to me that some people may have been offended at the truncated apology, but it didn't bother me. I was surprised she mentioned it at all, and it was becoming more apparent that Alice's theory had been correct. Well, that, or I was very good at deluding myself.

We didn't really carry on a conversation on the way to the restaurant. We listened to the music, and every once in a while discussed a song that had played. Arriving around eight in the evening, the temperature had dropped drastically, and Bella's thin shirt wasn't helping battle her shivers. I offered her my jacket, and she took it with a small "thank you."

Once we were inside, there was even less discussion, because I was stuffing food in my face like I was in a contest. After only a frozen burrito for breakfast and no lunch—I didn't even remember because of nerves, and Bella never said anything—I was starving. I would have been embarrassed, if Bella hadn't been doing the same thing.

About halfway through eating I heard my phone vibrate, and realized it was in my jacket pocket that I had loaned to her. She reached in and handed it to me, but I just put it to the side. There was nothing anyone could possibly need from me that would be worth interrupting my time with Bella.

Back at the apartments, I parked in front of Bella's truck. I opened her door for her, and she took my hand when she got out. We stood in front her gate, and she stared into my eyes as I lifted and kissed the back of her hand without a second's hesitation. Right on cue, she blushed and looked away.

"Goodnight, Bella." I let her hand go so she could find her key.

She pushed the gate open, looked back at me and breathed, "Goodnight, Edward." And I watched her as she walked away from me to her door.

I couldn't suppress the shit-eating grin on my face all the way back to my apartment. No words could adequately express the feeling I had at that moment, and I didn't even care to try. Once I was inside, something came to me, and I decided to push my luck a bit further.

**Hello, Neighbor.**

I texted Bella, and only seconds later I received one back.

**B: Hello!**

**E: I had fun today. Those kids were a little annoying, but their reactions were funny.**

**B: That one little girl made me smile. She reminded me of when –I- first realized there was an actual person under all that wrapping.**

**E: I'd bet you were a cute kid.**

**B: Better rec-o-nize! ;)**

**E: So I was wondering if you would like a lift to study group on Monday.**

I waited about a minute with no response, and started to mentally berate myself for assuming that this would be okay. But before I could panic too much, I heard my phone buzz and quickly looked at the message.

**Sure. :)

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**Awww… Yaaay! Edward is manning-up and making an effort!**

**Hokay, so… depending on how I finish chapter 16 (it's still in the works, I haven't sent it to my betas yet), we may or may not have a chapter 17 (but it's lookin' like we will). I'll definitely let you know, though. It may even be after the New Year, just because there's a lot of stuff going on, and I'm sure it is for you, too. In any case, if you don't get it when I first post it, it'll be here when you come back, so no worries! :)**

**How did everyone like their trip to the Getty? Jana and I just had this trip mid-November (minus the romantic factor and hand-holding), and there really was a girl who was fascinated by the Mummy of Herakleides, although we didn't talk to her. It is a permanent fixture there, and the video is super cool to watch, so if you ever get the opportunity to get down there, absolutely do it. And the Chimera of Arezzo (Kim-air-uh of Ar-etz-o) is there until February, I think. It's pretty funny looking, in my opinion. No matter what exhibits are there, it's just a damn cool place in general, and it's absolutely beautiful scenery and architecture. Plus, all of the employees are really nice.**

**And Jana, I'm so sorry! I totally forgot that In-N-Out is something we wanted/forgot to do! Well, we'll fix that when you come back out here. Hah!**

**Woohoo! Now go and review! Kthxbai. Haha.**


	16. Chapter 16

**It has been brought to my attention by an unnamed individual—coughSYLVIAcough—that I talk a lot about putting sticky things on Edward and then trying to lick them off. The only thing I have to say in my defense is that I have none. I certainly do not apologize for myself. I can have fantasies about an underage vampire. The laws don't apply to him. I mean, he was going to stay with Bella the rest of her life if she had let him… gross, but true.**

**Back to business. This chapter was f-ing difficult. There's one more chapter after this, and I had to write half of it before I felt comfortable with this one. Then we've got Bella's POV and then the sequel. To make it easier, you can put me on Author Alert, because I don't know when I'm going to get those out. I'm planning to pretty much finish them before I post anything, because I understand how difficult it is when RL gets in the way of an author posting a story. You can't blame the author, cause RL always comes first, but I know it's still frustrating. Especially those twats who start a story and don't know where they're going to go with it, and then quit. If you don't know where a story is going then fine, but at least commit, man. Okay, enough of my rant. *smile***

**For those of you who are relatively new to ff[.]net, you don't have to be a writer to have a profile here. When you log in to your account you can send private messages (PMs) to other users, put stories and authors on your Favorites list, and ff[.]net can send you alerts for when authors post chapters, or new stories (see previous paragraph context).**

**I'll yap at you more after. On to the chapter!

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This may sound completely off-the-wall, but I had learned something monumental from my date with Bella: I was not afraid of intimacy. Please don't misunderstand, it still scared the shit out of me, but it was fear of rejection, not anything deeper than that. It was an interesting revelation, to say the least. Given that I didn't have any experience at all, it wasn't exactly something I could gauge. But I knew, from the moment she let me hold her hand, that I could confidently execute every single thing I wanted to do to her. My imagination had more recently become better than cable.

All of this new information gave me a lot more confidence with myself. It wasn't perfect, and I was far from cocky, but at least I knew I wasn't a dork to the point that I was disabled. Just temporarily impaired.

The text message I received while I was out with Bella was from Alice, wondering how everything was going. I waited to call her the next day around eleven in the morning.

"Spill." She commanded as her greeting. I just laughed.

I proceeded to explain the previous day while she "ooh'd" and "aah'd", and literally shrieked into my ear when I told her that I held Bella's hand and offered to give her a ride on Monday.

"Alright, I've got a lot of work to catch up on, so I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay, fine, Mr. Party Pooper. I'll talk to you later."

"Bye, Alice." I quickly ended the call before she could think of anything else to ask. I actually did have work to do, but it was more of an excuse. Really, the longer I stayed on the phone describing my date, the more I felt like I should be doing it over a tub of ice cream and shaving my legs in a pink bath robe.

Monday morning while I opened with Angela, she asked me about Saturday.

"Wow, word gets around." I instantly felt badly about how that sounded, but she responded before I could explain myself.

"I'm sorry, Alice did tell me. I won't pry."

"I'm sorry, Angela, I really don't mind. I didn't mean it to come out that way. I don't think my verbal filter is really working yet. Perhaps it's the lack of caffeine. You'd better ask me really embarrassing questions now, before I can defend myself."

She just laughed. I quickly recounted the key points that I had relayed the day before, and I could tell that she was trying to hold in her excitement for my benefit.

"You're pretty quiet. Alice almost perforated my eardrum over the phone yesterday when I told her all this." I said with a smirk. She giggled, let out a dramatic squeak, and just grinned at me.

"Well, I'm glad it's working out for you, Edward. You deserve it." She said so sincerely, I didn't argue with her. I didn't know about deserving anything, but I was happy with how much progress was being made, even if it was slow.

We opened the store a few minutes early when we saw one of our regular customers standing outside.

"Good morning, Lydia!" I unlocked the door for her, and then made my way back around the counter to ring up her Purple-Eye. Now, I liked coffee, but three extra shots of espresso in a cup of already-strong coffee was way more than I could handle. The woman had some serious stomach lining, that's for sure.

"Good morning, Edward. You know, you look so handsome. You've let your hair grow out, you've got new glasses, and you just look… happy."

"Well, thank you. You look pretty awake for being up so early. Why _are _you here so early?" She usually came in around 6:30-6:45 a.m., but it was only five-'til-five.

"Ah… yeah… well, this is going to be my new schedule this semester. It works out better this way, so that I can pick up my kids from school on my way home. Getting my paperwork finished before I go to my classes makes me a little more disciplined in how long I take to do it. And, that way, I can give things to my TA earlier. Just speeds up the whole cycle."

I made her three shots while she was talking, and nodded in response.

"Well, I hope it works out for you, then. I know we're not all morning people. I'm beginning to realize I'm not really one, either, it's just that up until now I haven't had anything better to do than go to sleep early." I rolled my eyes, and she laughed while I handed her drink to her.

"Thank you very much, Edward, and I'm glad that you have better things to do now than go to sleep early." She winked at me, and made her way out the door.

Angela turned around from stocking the reach-in and smiled at me.

"You know who that is, right?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Sure, it's Lydia. She comes in all the time." I furrowed my brow in response to hers.

"Yeah… Lydia Ramirez." She explained, but I just stood there blankly. "Mrs. Ramirez? That's the professor that Bella TA's for."

I was stunned at the connection, and decided to ask Bella about it later. I wondered if she knew that they just barely missed each other almost every day the previous semester.

A few minutes later we had a line out the door, and it didn't end until 7:45. Fortunately, Angela had amply stocked the front, so I only had to make one product run toward the end of the rush.

When I came back out toting two jugs of soymilk, I noticed Bella had taken a seat at the table by the door. I wondered briefly if I would ever get over the effect she had on me. Despite the cold containers I was holding, I distinctly felt my palms starting to sweat, and my heartbeat picked up.

_Work. You're working. There's a line waiting._

When it finally died down, Bella placed her book face down on the table and walked up to the counter with a quiet smile.

"Good morning. Busy?" She giggled and her lips turned up into a wide grin.

"Marginally." I tried to keep a straight face, but it didn't really work. "What can I get you this morning?"

As she stood there for a split second, her grin faded into a pout-slash-smirk, nose-flare and eyebrow-raise that I assumed meant, "When was the last time you had to ask me that, Genius?" So I just said a lame "yeah" and went back to ringing up her order. She snorted and then giggled. Apparently she couldn't do "deadpan" today, either.

Rather than saying something interesting and witty, I just stared at her while I handed back her change. She thanked me and headed back to her seat, and I went to go help Angela with the line of drinks waiting to be made.

I was so focused on brewing espresso and the house decaf that I didn't even notice Alice had come in. So when she tapped me on the shoulder and said "Get out of here," I almost spilled a blended iced coffee all over Angela.

"Sorry, Edward." She chuckled. "We've got this, so you can leave. Bella's waiting for you." She gave me a knowing smirk as I went to remove my apron and gather my belongings from the back.

I met Bella at the door, and we walked slowly to the parking lot.

"So Lydia Ramirez is the professor you TA for? Are you aware that you both came in almost every day last semester only about a half hour apart?" I questioned.

"Oh, yes." She looked surprised, but answered anyway. "She's actually the reason I started coming here. She would taunt me every morning with her ridiculously strong coffee that smelled absolutely divine, and raved about the customer service here." With her last comment, she grinned at me, so I grinned back. "Anyway… so the first day I came in, I had no idea what I wanted. Alice actually suggested the combination that I get now. It's the perfect mix between regular coffee and a latte."

I smirked at her analysis as we reached her truck. I would have to thank Lydia profusely some day.

"So what class do you have right now?" We had only basically discussed our units for the semester, but nothing specific.

"Oh…" Her face began to flush. "I don't have a class right now, they start at noon all week." My smile faltered. Not because of any negative impact, on the contrary, I was elated. But I was shocked as hell that she had possibly only come in to see me, and then she seemed to read my mind. "I um… I came in around ten-thirty on Wednesday last week, but Alice said you get off at eight… So I thought I'd come by early to say 'hi.'" Her eyes bored into mine and the same electricity that I felt when I held her hand before was crackling in the space between us. "So… Hi."

"Hi." I took a deep breath. The fact that I could smell her made me aware that I had unconsciously moved toward her while she was talking.

"Hi." She breathed again. My heart was crashing in my chest and I stole a glance at her lips.

_Maybe…—_

Bella and I both gasped when my phone alarm went off, indicating that I had to leave for school (my "warning bell" that tells me "If you don't leave right now, you're going to be late, Asshole!").

"I'm sorry, I've got to go." There was no way to cover up my disappointed expression if I had wanted to. "Meet you at ten-to-eight?" _Damn classes. _She just nodded, and I waited for her to get in her truck.

As I was walking to my car I glanced behind me, and she looked up at the same time. She grinned, and then went back to pulling away from her parking spot.

Driving to school, I wondered how I could possibly get so lucky. I dared to believe now that Bella actually had feelings for me. _Wow, that's weird to think about._ I had never done the dating thing before, so I really hoped I wouldn't screw it up. I always assumed that if I was ever put in a situation like this, my insides would shrivel up and I'd die of panic. As it was, I think I had reached my panic-threshold a while ago, and gave up on it all together. Not that I wasn't nervous at all, but I had realized it was pointless to kill myself with it. I was finally beginning to understand the practical upshot of laughing at yourself. There was still room for drunken moshing butterflies, but there was no reason to let them tear-up your stomach with their machetes.

vvv

My day proved to be quite boring until I was heading back to my car after my Applied Statistics class.

_Don't care that it's your major. Three hours of Stats in one sitting every week? You will die before the semester is over._

Tanya caught me outside of the Sciences building.

"Hey there, Sexy." She put on her I'm-trying-to-be-seductive-now voice. I smirked. The one woman who actually made an unrelenting effort to get in my pants, didn't interest me in the slightest. "So are you going to be at the study group tonight?"

"Yes." I may not have appreciated the way she looked at me like a piece of meat, but I wasn't going to be rude, no matter how much I just wanted to laugh at her.

"Well then…" She cocked her head to the side and put her hand on my chest. I just raised my eyebrow and remained silent. "…I'll uh… see you tonight."

"Goodbye, Tanya." There was humor in my voice, but I believe she misinterpreted it, because she winked and blew me a kiss before walking to the building behind me.

I just laughed to myself and shook my head as I walked to my car.

I got home around 5:45 p.m., which gave me two hours to study as much as possible. I did realize that I was heading to a "study group," but I didn't want to have to focus so hard if I was going to be there with Bella.

When the time to go pick her up rolled around—well, "crawled at a snail's pace" was more like it—I gathered my things and headed across the street, only to see Bella locking her door before I reached the gate. I thought back to when I mused about her waiting at the window, but actually put some stock in it this time.

_Screw being timid. If you're going to give in to the idea that she likes you, might as well put yourself on the line to thoroughly be trampled if it all comes to naught._

"How was your day?" I asked as she closed the gate behind her.

"Uh… fine, I guess." She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes, and a stray piece of hair fell into her face. My hand reached up on its own accord to tuck it back behind her ear, and I heard her breathing falter.

"Are you okay?" I was starting to pick up on when something was wrong. She didn't usually tell me what it was, but that didn't mean I didn't notice. Her shoulders relaxed a little bit, and then her fake smile melted into a genuine one.

"Yeah, I'm okay."

We walked to my car, and I held open her door. When we reached Tyler's apartment, I didn't know how awkward it would be for me to try to hold Bella's hand. It was only about fifteen feet to the building, five steps to the elevator, and then just around the corner of the hallway to the door. Also, nothing was official, so I didn't want either of us to be put in a situation where we were uncomfortable not knowing what to do once we got there.

Another issue I had was that I really wanted to ask Bella out on another date, but I had nothing planned. Perhaps I would have a stroke of genius, and ask her on the way home.

The elevator ride was an interesting experience. It couldn't have been more than ten seconds from the time the doors closed and then reopened, but it was instantly awkward. The smooth-finished walls of the cabin made an echo, which made me acutely aware of everything: our shifting bodies and heightened breathing, and I was pretty positive she could hear my heart beating wildly if she listened close enough. Once the doors were wide enough, Bella almost bolted from her spot and waited for me at the corner of the hallway. I was sure she had felt the same intensity pass between us, and she couldn't hide the amusement in her eyes when I caught up with her and we went to knock.

vvv

The night was, for the most part, like any other. I used Bella as a buffer again between Tanya and me, and it worked.

After about fifteen minutes, I got a text message from Esme.

**Esme: Hey, Honey! Just seeing how you're liking your classes. Call me!**

**Edward: They're fine. Applied Stats is going to kill me. I'll call you tomorrow, though, I'm at study group.**

I didn't get a response back, and just returned my phone to my jacket pocket that I laid on the floor next to me. A while later pizza finally arrived, and I thanked the gods that Tyler had taken over the food responsibility. It made it easier to pay him than everyone texting back and forth over who was going to be the runner that day. I had evaded the job, not because I minded doing it, but because of the fact that I was horrible at trying to make decisions that would affect other people.

Once everyone had settled back in the living room, my phone vibrated again. I reached for my jacket, but it wasn't where I left it. Confused, I tried the other pocket.

_Oh. _I was sure I had put it in the first one. _Oh well._

**Esme: Oh! Arf you wiuh Bella? I wont interupt, thdn. ;) Jtst call when you cn.**

A grin spread across my face when I pictured how my mom was probably jumping up and down and having a hard time typing that. That's probably why it took her so long to respond: she just couldn't get her fingers to punch the right buttons.

**Edward: Sure thing, Nosey. :-P**

Bella leaned over and whispered, "Who was that?"

"My mom." I responded. "She's just being funny." A strange smile came across her face, like she had just made a connection of some kind, but then went back to her notes.

A while later Bella got up to use the bathroom, and Tanya moved in. How had I guessed that that would happen? Oh… right.

"So what are you doing after this, Edward?" She purred in my ear. I looked around and noticed Tyler's nose flaring and mouth twitching. She had an audience, and I wondered if she noticed, or even cared.

"I'm taking Bella home, why do you ask?" I figured I might as well make it obvious to her that I wasn't interested, so I looked her straight in the eye with an annoyed face. Surely she must have noticed the way Bella and I interacted, and how we had arrived together tonight. It took everything in me to not tell her to go screw herself. She might have taken that as me inviting myself to come watch her. Plus, it wouldn't be very gentlemanly. It's not like she had done anything to me, physically, and I was clearly in control of the situation.

"Well, I was just wondering if you wanted to do something… together." She put her hand on my shoulder like the last time, and again, I shrugged out of under it. "Maybe you're free on Friday."

"Actually, I'm closing on Friday." _Thank God for Eric's prickiness._ On the way back from school I had received a text from him asking if we could trade shifts so he could go to the event of another far-reaching "family member." It made it a lot easier for me to tell the truth than having to turn her down cold or make something up.

"Ah… Well, then I might just have to come and see your customer service skills." She pulled herself back to her notes just as I heard the water running from the bathroom. Neither innuendo was lost on me, and I looked over to Tyler to see his shoulders bouncing, barely containing his silent laughter. Bella sat back down in her seat between me and the Jezebel across the floor.

I tried to look like I was studying while actually watching Bella. She had the cutest furrowed eyebrows when she was concentrating really hard on something, and then roll her eyes when she finally got it, like she should have understood all along. She would cross her legs when she was just trying to memorize the material, but she'd pull her right knee up and wrap her arm around it when she read something that was really interesting to her.

I had almost decided to completely give up the "I'm studying" façade when Bella looked up and asked if I was ready to leave. I gathered my things and we headed to my car.

Once we were in the hallway, we both noticed that the temperature had dropped. Bella had left her jacket, so I gave her mine that was draped over my arm.

"Thanks." She shivered, and I took her book bag from her while she bundled up.

Her teeth were chattering by the time we got to my car, so I immediately turned the heat on full blast before we left anywhere. We had only been there a couple hours, so it hadn't completely cooled down, and we were both warm fairly quickly.

"So how do you like your classes so far?" Bella said once her tremors had subsided.

"They're okay. I think I can handle Engel, but I swear my Applied Stats class is going to be the end of me. How about you?"

"Well…" She sighed heavily. "…I am taking Stats over again. I'm a little discouraged by that. I got a C-minus. She actually gave me a 'minus'. I was so frustrated, but I'm getting used to the fact that I just can't understand that class to save my life. And I'm taking Intro to Biology, and guess what: She grades our notes." I laughed out loud at that, and she looked over at me like I was crazy.

"I'm sorry… but I had Stilton last semester. I had the same reaction. Her note-grading was the reason I got a B rather than an A in that class, but I wouldn't retake it even if I got a C. I wanted to die about a third of the way in. Tough break." I tried to stifle my laughter when she looked like she wanted to kick me out of my car and drive off.

"Hmmm… maybe I can transfer professors. I wonder if there is anyone else who teaches it at the same time. My whole schedule is smushed together. I'm only glad my days start later so that I have time to eat beforehand. I have classes for seven straight hours on Wednesdays. I think I'm gonna have to start buying more granola bars to keep in my truck so I don't shrivel up and die."

We pulled up to park way too soon. I got out of the car and Bella gasped as the cold air wafted into the cabin. When I went to open her door for her, she locked it and shook her head violently. I laughed at her.

"Come on, it's not that bad!" I said loud enough so she could hear me.

"No, it's cold. You can go inside, just leave your keys, and I'll stay warm right here!" She nodded and grinned at me, and then let go of the lock. When I opened her door she got out and dramatically shook to prove her point. Then a thought crossed my mind.

Before I could convince myself it was a bad idea, I wrapped my arms around her and held her close. Instantly, all teasing was gone, replaced by our electricity. It felt so good to have her against me, and both of our breathing increased significantly.

"Still cold?" I knew I wasn't. She slowly shook her head, and swallowed. I was trying to steel my resolve to finally kiss her, when she sneezed.

And sneezed again. It would have been cute, if it hadn't been so ill-timed. Okay, so it was adorable.

I just smiled, and took a deep breath. I mentally smacked myself for waiting so long. "Maybe we should get you inside." She gave me an embarrassed smile and blushed, then nodded.

I walked her to the gate with my right arm around her waist. I gave back her school bag and we said 'goodnight' as she put her key in the lock, and again, I watched her walk to her door.

I realized I hadn't come up with anything to ask her out again, and figured I could just call her the next day before her class if I came up with anything. But with that thought, I realized that I had left my phone in my jacket, that Bella still had. Well, I'd get it back from her soon. I'd go in to work and get a hold of Alice so she could call her for me, if Bella didn't notice right away.

By the time I got back to my apartment, I was exhausted. I had no homework, and I couldn't call anyone if I wanted to, so I just turned in.

vvv

The next morning I went into the store around ten.

"Hey, Edward, Bella was just here dropping off your jacket. It's in the back."

_Oh. That was fast._

I went and grabbed it from the desk, and took my phone out of the pocket, but the folder screen didn't look right. I flipped it up and found a text message still open on the screen.

_Oh shit._

**Sender: Tanya Markov**

**Body: Hey, Sexy. Sorry we couldn't work anything out sooner, but I can't wait to see you on Friday. Sleep well, Hot Stuff. ;-***

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**Uh oh… did you catch that? Yup… Bella saw the text from her on his phone and read it. Ouch… Not brilliant, Bella. Please don't be too mad at her, though! *pouts***

**Tell you what you guys… I'm hiring you all to pimp-out my story. As payment you get… my gratitude. Isn't that awesome? Yessssssss!**

**Alright… time to review… Woohoo! Hey, that rhymes... yikes. Bikes! *looks around red-faced* *runs off to work on chapter 17***


	17. Chapter 17

**Well, this is the last chapter, guys! Go ahead and read, and I'll talk to you at the end. (READ the new author's note at the bottom, please!)  


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I was absolutely mortified-Bella had obviously read the text message. And although she shouldn't have put any stock into what Tanya had said, my gut feeling was that she did. I immediately called her, but it went straight to voicemail. I sent her a text message for her to call me. At the very least I would be able to gauge the damage when I talked to her.

I knew that I should have been upset that Bella had invaded my privacy, but I just couldn't muster the right attitude. She had been wary about Tanya from the beginning, and my phone lists the sender of a new text on the top screen. If I were Bella, I would wonder why I even had Tanya's number in my phone, and… it occurred to me that I didn't.

Then it all came together. When I went to grab my phone to read the second text from Esme, I wasn't crazy: it really WAS in the wrong pocket. That must have been when Tanya got a hold of it. I went through my Call Log and noticed a dial-out to her number at 8:43 p.m.. That woman was seriously diabolical, and I then had no problem letting her know what I thought about her the next time she caught up with me.

Bella didn't contact me at all on Tuesday. I waited out in front of her apartment all evening, but didn't catch her coming in or out. I may have looked like an idiot, but I didn't care. Something as stupid as a misunderstood text message was not going to come between me and the best thing that had ever happened to me.

Despite everything, I smiled at the thought of that. Bella really was the best thing that had ever happened to me. She was what made me want to get up in the morning, and not want to go to bed at night. She put me on more of a high than any amount of caffeine ever would, but she could calm me better than anything, too. Her goals and ambitions made me excited about mine, and her convictions made me question my assumptions about everything.

I was jolted from my reverie when someone needed to unlock the gate. I quickly moved out of the way, but then just decided to go knock on her door. I felt a little weird walking in where I had never been invited, but I needed to talk to Bella.

Waiting a couple minutes after I knocked on the door I figured she was either not home, or not coming to the door. I knocked one more time just in case, but no one answered.

My stomach growled at me. I realized I hadn't eaten since breakfast, and it was already six. I went and had a slice of some kind of pizza and a Sprite, but didn't really taste it. I imagined worst-case scenarios until I went to bed that night.

Bella never wanting to talk to me again.

Bella slapping me in the face and calling me an asshole.

Bella laughing at the fact that I ever had feelings for her.

Bella saying that the only time she had ever wanted to kiss me was when she was drunk.

Bella walking away and not saying anything.

Bella coming in to get coffee and pretending like nothing ever happened between us.

I fell into a fitful sleep and vividly dreamt of scenes that my conscious mind wasn't creative enough to come up with.

"Oh my gosh, Edward, are you okay?" Alice said as she unlocked the door when I walked up.

"I didn't sleep very well last night. And my head really hurts. I took a few ibuprofen this morning, so I'd really appreciate if we kept the loud noises or music to a minimum until it kicks in." I felt like I had been hit by a four-by-four. I had circles under my eyes, my muscles were sore, and my head pounded and felt like it weighed a ton.

"Is that it? I get the distinct feeling like something happened."

We walked into the back room, and I just pulled out my phone and showed Alice the text.

"Who is Tanya, and why is she being such a whore?" She said with a scowl on her face.

I laughed, and it hurt, so I held my head. This is the kind of response that Bella should have had, rather than ignoring me. When it didn't feel like my head was going to fall off my neck, I responded.

"A girl who hit on me relentlessly a year ago, and she's in our study group. For some reason she thinks me ignoring her and paying attention to Bella is code for, 'I want you, let's go now.'"

Alice's scowl turned into an incredulous gasping jaw-drop.

"Lemme at her. I'll kill her. Where does she live?" She actually started to stomp out of the room, but I just grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"Thank you for your fervor, but I think this would be a situation better handled on my own. However, if Bella never talks to me again, I will absolutely let you hunt down Tanya and rip her to shreds." That seemed to calm her a little bit.

"Do you want me to talk to Bella?"

I shook my head.

"No, I'd much rather just do it myself. I'm tired of not being man enough to just do things on my own. Thank you anyway, though, Alice."

We made quick work of opening, and Alice would randomly spout threats on Tanya's life here and there. It made me feel a bit better, knowing that I wasn't absolutely crazy for wishing that a house would drop on her. I had had enough of her games, and it only strengthened my intent to make sure that this wouldn't kill my relationship with Bella.

She didn't come in. I had expected as much, but it still stung. I really wasn't feeling well, and I knew I wouldn't be able to concentrate in school. We were beginning to discuss Black Like Me in Intro to Sociology, and Robert Frost in Intro to English. Man, you really should have spread out your Intro classes. This blows. So I decided to just go home after I left work. I needed real sleep if I was going to meet Bella before Study Group and be simultaneously coherent.

Once Jessica got there, I stayed an hour and a half later to help out with a random rush before I left.

"Thanks for staying, Edward. Good luck tonight. Call me if you need anything, okay?" Alice said when we were both in the back room. Jessica was not the kind of person I wanted to have informed on my life, and I wasn't the only one who felt that way.

I walked into my apartment, and headed straight to my bed to see if I could fall asleep. After lying there for about forty-five minutes, I decided self-medication wouldn't hurt me too badly. It had already been seven hours since I had taken the ibuprofen, so I grabbed a beer from my refrigerator and downed it. I wasn't planning on making alcohol a part of my sleep-routine, but it worked pretty well. I didn't drink often, and only really kept beer for guests, so I conveniently remained a lightweight. It relaxed me just enough to finally doze-off.

I woke up around 6:30 p.m., and felt infinitely better. My head was still a little heavy, but no longer made me want to gouge my eyes out to distract from the pounding, and my body was tired, but no longer achy. I looked at my phone to see no new texts or missed calls.

Wow. Surprise there.

I decided to take a shower and eat. Once I was finished fulfilling two of my basic needs, it was 7:15, and I drove to Tyler's early. I waited in my car until it was almost eight, as Rosalie and Emmett arrived, then Tanya, then Alec and Jane.

Perfect. Only Bella's left.

A few minutes after Alec and Jane were inside, I took the elevator up and waited around the corner. After ten minutes I started to worry that she would go to the extreme of trying to avoid me completely, but then I heard the elevator move as it was being called to the lobby.

My heart was pounding in my chest. I needed her to listen to me. And, if I was being honest with myself, I didn't know what she thought about this. Maybe I had only been deluding myself this entire time that she was interested in me, and she would laugh in my face. Maybe this text message was just the excuse she needed to… No.

I heard the elevator "ding" as it reached the fourth floor, and Bella walked out of the cabin muttering to herself. She grasped at her chest and suppressed a scream when she came around the corner and saw me standing against the wall.

"Edward?" She looked guilty, and hurt.

"Um… Thank you for dropping off my jacket and phone." I guess I hadn't planned what I was going to say when I finally saw her. Good job.

"Yeah, well… I wouldn't want you to miss any important calls… or texts." She looked down at her hands and made a face. Any doubt I had about what she may have thought regarding the situation before was gone.

"Bella…" I pushed away from the wall, but she backed up in response. "…that text from Tanya isn't what it looked like."

"I wanted to apologize…"

I hadn't intended this to become a confession. I didn't care about that.

"Bella, don't—"

She continued as if she hadn't heard me.

"For invading your privacy. I was wrong. It won't happen again."

"Bella—" I started, but she ignored me and started to walk toward Tyler's apartment. "Bella." I tried again, and grabbed for her shoulder. She stopped, but closed her eyes. "Bella." I whispered, and she closed her eyes tighter, so I tried a different tactic. I took the bag off of her shoulder and turned her around to face me. She didn't put up a fight. Her name crossed my lips again, but I didn't have a breath to make it audible when I cupped her cheek with my hand.

Her eyes shot open and her breath was heavy. I just stared into her eyes while I brushed her soft cheek with my thumb. I tried to convey the truth of everything I needed to tell her before I said it.

"You have to understand something. Tanya means nothing to me. She did ask me out again. I said that I was working on Friday, and she told me that she would come in to see me. She implied other things…" I rolled my eyes, only briefly breaking contact with hers. "…but I couldn't very well call her out on it in front of other people. And what should I have said, 'No, don't come in to my store and purchase anything'?"

"Yes!" Bella said with surprising forcefulness, but I hadn't realized it was just what I needed to hear. I smirked.

"Why, Bella?" I moved closer as I prompted her quietly. She swallowed as she backed up again to my advances.

"Because…"

I just waited silently, not breaking our eye contact.

"Because what, Bella?" I needed her to tell me.

"Because…" She swallowed before she continued. "…Tanya's only ever after one thing."

My smirk became more prominent, and I shook my head. I took another step toward her, and she had backed up to the wall.

"Nope. Already used that one."

Her eyes widened again, and she tried to look away. I took my left hand that was still on her shoulder and moved it to hold the other side of her face. I turned her head back to look at me.

Something flashed in her eyes, and she closed the distance between us, her body pressed against mine. She didn't look away when her cheeks flushed.

"Because…" She reached up slowly and took my left hand from her cheek. She closed her eyes and turned slightly to press her lips to my palm.

Both of our hearts were beating like bongos. I would have heard hers if it wasn't drowned out by mine, but I could feel it in the pulse at her neck.

"Hey, are you two coming or not?" We jumped as we heard Emmett yelling from Tyler's door, grinning, and Bella quickly backed away from me. I swore at that point if I ever knew Emmett long enough, I would enthusiastically pay him back. Preferably something painful and-or embarrassing.

"Yeah… um… we are." Bella cleared her throat and went to go grab her bag as Emmett took his stupid ass back to the living room. I would have laughed if it wasn't so fucking NOT funny. I had been a pansy, and wasted time, and done everything in the Book of Things NOT To Do If You Really, Really Want To Be With Someone, and I was NOT leaving this hallway without kissing Bella.

I took the bag from her shoulder and put on the floor, probably with a little more force than was necessary. I pulled her by the waist around the corner by the elevator and held her against the wall by her shoulders. I really hoped I wasn't scaring her, but from the look on her face I knew I didn't need to worry. Her pupils had dilated, making her irises look darker. She was looking up at me from beneath her lashes and her breathing was ragged. She raised her head slightly as I leaned down and whispered in her ear.

"You never answered my question." I felt her shudder at my accusation. But before she could answer, I crashed my lips to hers. It only took a split second for her to move her arms from beneath my grasp and wrap them around my neck as she frantically moved her mouth with mine. Since my hands were no longer occupied in making sure she didn't leave, my right hand moved up behind her neck, and my left traced down her shoulder, along her right side and rested at the small of her back, before adding more pressure to hold her closer along the length of our bodies.

She turned her head to the side which gave us both better access, and her right hand moved up into my hair. I felt her tug at it, ever so slightly, and made me moan into her mouth at the sensation.

And… THIS is why we don't buzz the hair.

She wasn't hitting my glasses anymore with the new position, but it wasn't like I could see out of them all fogged up even if I needed to, so I just tossed them on the floor. I went to put my hand back behind her head. Softer this time, and I ran my fingers from the base of her neck, up into her hair, and then back down to stroke her neck. She shivered and smiled against my lips, and then backed up.

"Does that answer your question?" Her voice was rough, and I could hear the smile in it. I opened my eyes to see her grinning at me. Her eyes were shining, cheeks were red, and lips were swollen. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. And I did it to her. I grinned to mirror hers.

"Hmmm… It wasn't horribly clear." I teased. I saw her lick her lips and then she pulled me back down to her level with the hand that was still in my hair. It was slow this time, quietly driving me insane.

Ah, but what a way to go.

We remembered, at the same time, that we were in an apartment complex, and people were wondering where we were. We broke away, and I leaned my forehead against hers as we caught our breath for a couple minutes in silence. She was the first to speak.

"Ready to go in?" She raised her eyebrow at me with a smirk on her face.

"Sure."

THE END...

* * *

**...Of _One's Company_, anyway. From now on will be the BPOV to various chapters, and then I'll be starting a sequel with these two crazy kids. **

**Thank you to all three of my betas: Cora, Sparks and Jana. You all provide a different perspective and purpose, especially going into this next fic that I kind of roped you into doing without really asking (hehehe).**

**Thanks for reading! Woot, woot!**

**Update (11/22/10): After much deliberation, and almost a year of fussing with this stupid thing, I have decided to put you all out of your misery. I will not be writing a full BPOV story. I will merely be posting outtakes (mind you, I hate that word-an "outtake" implies that it was IN the story originally) from Bella's POV, although it will be for quite a few chapters. The fact was that, to put it plainly, it was boring. Nothing happens in the first 7 chapters, and you don't care how Bella gets her apartment or how Rosalie makes fun of Tyler at lunch. (I'm REALLY sorry, Luz. I'm totally not using your translation.)**

**I should have something posted in a week.  
**


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